Winter's Shadow
by dankmemewhore
Summary: After being taken by HYDRA as a young teenager, you are finally able to make your escape thanks to your long time partner, the Winter Soldier. Reader Insert. Follows Reader from Captain America: The Winter Soldier through Avengers: Endgame.
1. Chapter 1

You snap your wrist and the metallic scent of blood fills your nostrils. The target gurgles helplessly for a moment, blood pouring from the deep wound of his neck before he slumps forward, his head landing on his desk with a dull thud. You wipe your blade on the back of his white dress shirt, leaving reddish brown stains on the expensive looking fabric. You kick the chair and it rolls out of the way allowing you access to the desk the man previously sat at. You plug in your flash drive and then use the blood splattered keyboard to bring up the command line.

"That was messy," You glance up, The Soldier sits crouched in the window, cold blue eyes looking out from curtains of dark hair.

"Even silenced gunshots are still gunshots," You reply quietly, knowing he could hear you despite the distance. Your eyes drop back to what you were doing; the file transfer was at 57%. "Unless you feel like taking out his private security army downstairs?"

"We could."

"Yeah, well we don't need to," You pull the drive out, putting it into the hidden pocket just above your breast, "The one outside? Three kids. It's not his fault his boss pissed someone off."

"That shouldn't matter," The Soldier says, his eyes dropping from yours as you approach to his hands; one flesh, the other metal, "Neither of us should care. We're not supposed to care." You place one hand on his shoulder feeling the tension in the muscle beneath the kevlar.

"Come on," You tell him, "Let's get out of here." He lifts his eyes to yours for a moment, and then lets himself fall backwards out the window. You give him a moment and then you climb out, letting your body fall. You enjoy the sensation of the wind on your face for a second or two before you grab the rope with one gloved hand, stopping yourself. Your feet brace against the wall of the building for a half a second before you repel yourself off, letting the rope run freely through your hand until you catch yourself a few feet before the ground. You drop the last few feet, landing on the sidewalk beside the Soldier.

You start to pull down the rope, but the Soldier shakes his head, "Leave it. We'll be long gone before anyone notices it." He climbs onto the black motorcycle parked in front of the building and you settle onto the seat behind him. He's silent as you ride out to the cornfield where the two of you had stashed the jet, so you keep your mouth shut as your body presses into his while he leads you through the two fast and tight turns. You look up from where your face was tucked into the back of his shoulder as the bike slows, confused.

"The jet is still six miles east," You tell him as he comes to a complete stop, "Something knock your sense of direction out of whack Soldier?" He climbs off the bike, still not looking at you or saying anything. You follow suit, a sense of unease settling over you as he stands there motionless. "What's going on?"

Finally he turns around, his combat knife clutched in his flesh hand. Your gun is drawn in a flash, jaw clenched as you level the sights at his head. Your finger ready to pull at the slightest movement. Time seems to slow around you, and after a handful of heartbeats the corners of his lips quirk up ever so slightly. He lifts his hands, palms out so you can see the now loose grip he keeps on the knife. "Relax doll. If I was gonna take you on I sure as hell wouldn't do it with this," he tilts his head towards the weapon in his hand without taking his eyes off of you. You keep him in your crosshairs for another breath before you lower your gun. "Thought we had _some_ semblance of trust."

The amusement you can hear in his voice puts you somewhat at ease and you holster your weapon, "Yeah, well you're not _always_ you," You remind him, "Not will you tell me what the hell is going on?"

"It's time. Something is going on, something big," Your eyes widen at the implication behind his words, "Let me see your arm." You lift your left arm and he grabs your wrist. He gently pushes your sleeve out of the way before running his fingers down the exposed flesh. "I'm going to cut out your tracker. Try not to shoot me." Your eye roll quickly turns into a grimace as he digs the blade into your arm. Hot blood runs down your arm in rivets and you grit your teeth as he jimmies the small tracking chip out of your arm.

"Worst surgeon ever," You say through gritted teeth as he pulls out the knife; you rip a piece of fabric from your sleeve and tie it around the incision as he tosses the tracking chip up into the air and sends one well placed bullet into the device. "Alright," You take a deep breath as you tighten your makeshift bandage, "Your turn." You reach for your own knife when he stops you from grabbing it.

"No," The Soldier shakes his head, "This is your chance. You have to go?"

"What?" You snap, "What the hell are you talking about? I'm not going without you. Don't be stupid."

"I can't," All the years you had worked with the Soldier you had seen shadows of emotion behind his carefully cultivated mask; a glimmer of amusement here, a hint of anger there, but you had never seen the mask completely break like it did right then. He grabs your shoulders, and you look at him with wide eyes, "They're inside my head (Y/n)," He almost pleads, "I can't. I can't go with you. But you can. You can get away."

"No," You clench your jaw, "Both of us or none of us. I won't go without you."

"(Y/n)," The Soldier shakes his head as a soft chuckle escapes his full lips, startling you. His grip on your shoulder tightens and then he pulls you forward towards him and those lips are on yours. Your mind goes completely blank as his mouth moves against yours in unfamiliar but delicious patterns and before you can completely register what is happening his mismatched hands shove you backwards and in your shock you don't even move to catch yourself. You land hard on your ass in the dirt; in the time it took you to reach the ground he's already on the bike, and you only have time to scramble to your feet before the bike takes off, tires kicking up dust in his wake.

You stand there dumbfounded as you stare off in the direction he disappeared. Disappeared to the jet. Where he would return to HYDRA without you. The two of you had infrequently discussed running when missions took you far from prying ears but you had never dared to hope that you would actually do it. And even when you had laid awake late at night and imagined it you had always imagined the two of you escaping together. Never on your own.

You didn't know what to do. With no plan and no ideas you started walking west until dirt turned to pavement and begin following the road without much thought. You were sure there were plenty of jobs for someone with your skill set, but you weren't sure how you were going to find them in Cornfield, Wisconsin. You make it almost a week and you're walking down a country road somewhere in Minnesota when warning bells start to go off in your head.

At first you're not sure where the gut reaction is coming from, and then you recognise the low hum of an engine in the distance. You force yourself to keep walking; this was a road after all there was bound to be at least a handful of travellers passing through. You turn your head slightly to the side to concentrate harder on the sound. Not just one car then… Three? Maybe four? After miles of empty road the sudden new additions had you on edge. But there was no way HYDRA could have found you this quickly. Could they?

You look behind you as the cars come within sight distance, and your hand drops to your gun as you take in the formation of black SUVs headed your way. Not four, six, and picking up speed. You start running in earnest, your heartbeat increasing in time with your footsteps.

You risk a glance over your shoulder; they're gaining on you. Of course they were, you were fast but not quite outrun a car fast. Another glance shows that you're out of time. You turn around, snapping a fresh clip into your gun before you open fire. You take out the tires of each truck with deadly accuracy and they come to squealing stops thirty feet from where you stand. The doors open and men come swarming out. You show no mercy, aiming for vital areas as they approach. Shit, you think as you drop out the empty clip and snap a fresh one in its place, there's too many of them. You glance at the bloodsoaked fabric covering your wrist, the exertion had reopened the wound and ribbons of blood flowed down your skin. Could they be tracking you a different way? This was as pretty an ambush as you had ever seen and you had been part of plenty.

Out of ammo you bring the butt of your gun savagely on the head of the first person to read you, blood splattering across your face like grisly freckles as his head caves in. You kick another one hard in the best, sending him flying backwards into his friends behind him. You let out a low growl as someone hits you across the back with some kind of rod that sends a sharp burst of electricity through your body. You spin, punching the one who hit you. You feel the bones in his face give beneath the force of your hit and then you grab the wrist of another of the men who swing another rod at you. You twist his wrist, and he drops the rod as the bone breaks.

You duck as one of the rods crackles over your head and then another rods hits the back of your legs, knocking your feet out from under you. You manage to half catch yourself but before you can get to your feet a dark haired man slams the butt of his rifle down into your face and everything goes dark.


	2. Chapter 2

The first thing you're consciously aware of is that you're walking. You're not 100% sure how you're walking as every part of your body feels numb but there's no mistaking the somewhat steady forward movement. The second thing is the dull ache in your head. You open your eyes, confused at the colored blobs that surround you. What the hell was going on? Something was holding on to your arm, the tight grip practically dragging you forward. You blink several times, trying to focus on the hand around your upper arm. Fighting through the haze that threatens to overwhelm you you manage to focus and a man's face swims into view. A familiar face. The face of the man who had knocked you unconscious.

With that knowledge, things start to become much clearer. You let your eyes fall closed again, and start a mental inventory of your body. Now that you had some idea what was going on, you could feel the sedative they must have given you coursing through your veins. Lucky for you they hadn't given you nearly enough if they wanted you to be docile. Even now you could feel your enhanced body quickly metabolising and things were growing sharper each second. You definitely had a concussion. Your face felt swollen to hell, and your nose felt like it was probably broken. Your weapons had naturally been removed, you could no longer feel the weight of your holsters.

The next question you had was who exactly had picked you up. You didn't recognize the man leading you, and if HYDRA had been the one to grab you they would've known to up the sedation significantly. You peek out from beneath your lashes, and your eyes catch on a SHIELD logo. You let your eyes open completely, keeping a glazed expression on your face; you were surrounded by the agents who were all armed. You were drugged and cuffed. You really weren't sure how you were going to get out of this one.

"Sir, are you sure you want to do this with the prisoner present?" One of the men asks the man holding you.

"She doesn't even know where she is," The man responds, to demonstrate he spins you around towards him before slapping you hard across the face. It takes everything you have not to rip his fucking head off, and keep the blank look in your eyes. When you got out of this, he was now at the top of your list. Blood flows over your lips but you don't move to wipe it. It was a waiting game now and you definitely weren't going to play your cards just yet. When you turn the corner and see the elevator doors they were marching you towards you almost breathe a sigh of relief. Now this you could work with. In such an enclosed area the guards would be more hesitant to fire their weapons and if you could get your hands on just one gun...

"Keep all STRIKE personnel on site," The man holding you says as the elevator doors slide open and he shoves you inside. "Cap." Your eyes widen as you take in the tall blonde man standing in the elevator. Here you were less than three feet away from one of HYDRA's top targets, and you had absolutely no need or desire to kill him. Funny how life turns out.

"Rumlow," Rogers says as the elevator doors close. He eyes you curiously and you meet his gaze with an impassive one of your own, "Who is she?"

"A HYDRA assassin," Rumlow says, his grip never wavering on your arm, "I'm headed down to interrogate her now." Rumlow, you muse, the name sounded vaguely familiar but it wouldn't matter long-if you had your way he wouldn't be alive much longer.

"Right," Rogers replies, lips pursed in what looks like disapproval, but he's no longer looking at you. The elevator stops again and more agents climb in. You find yourself pushed back against the glass wall, Rumlow's hand still vice-like around your arm. You eye the drop and decide that enhanced or not there was no way you were surviving the drop from this height. Not to mention knowing SHIELD the glass was probably missile proof or something. And Roger's presence seriously lowered the odds of you fighting your way out of the elevator. You were pretty positive that no matter how good you were you weren't fighting Captain Stars and Stripes handcuffed and coming out of it on top.

On the other hand, once they got you where they were taking you the chances of you escaping dropped exponentially; this could be your only shot.

"I'm sorry about what happened with Fury," Rumlow says, "Messed up, what happened to him."

"Thank you," Rogers responds, but he seems preoccupied as he looks around the elevator. You follow his gaze from an agent gripping his gun to the bead of sweat that runs down another man's temple as he grips a briefcase. The elevator opens once more and another three men step in. The Captain looks around as the doors close and then a look of resignation crosses his features. Everything is silent for a few beats, and then Rogers asks, "Before we get started, does anyone want to get out?"

You consider telling him that you would very much like to get out, but you figured he wasn't exactly talking to you. As if his words were a signal, the last man to get on extends one of the electric rods they had used to ambush you with. Rumlow's still got you and you watch confused as they attack Rogers, pinning him to the wall. Just when you think he's done, Rogers manages to kick one of his attackers, gaining the upper hand. He sends an elbow into the one holding him from behind before throwing him over his head. One of them manages to pin Rogers to the wall with some kind of magnetic cuff and then Rumlow releases you, launching his own attack on Rogers with an electric rod of his own. You watch, still in shock for a moment as the electricity courses through Rogers body and then you attack, bringing your cuffed hands down on the head of the man closest to you before kicking Rumlow hard in the side, sending him across the elevator. You throw your elbow back into the face of another agent and then grab the metal cuff holding Rogers to the wall of the elevator, ripping it off and throwing it to the floor. Free once again Rogers punches one of the two agents still on their feet while you kick the other one hard in the chest.

Rumlow's back on his feet,a rod in each hand as his eyes shift from you to the Captain. "I just want you to know Cap," he says, "This isn't personal-" On the last word he leaps forward, hitting Rogers in the stomach with one of the rods. You grab his wrist, twisting it and driving the rod into Rumlow's leg. He drops to the ground and you slam your knee into his face. He hits the glass wall behind him and spider web like cracks spread across the surface.

"It kind of feels personal," You hear Rogers say, but you barely register it as you walk forward towards Rumlow who looks up at you, face coated in blood from where you had broken his nose. You draw your knee back and slam it into his face a second time, this time his head lolls forward as he slips away into unconsciousness. Undeterred you pull back for a third hit when a hand claps onto your shoulder. You had almost forgotten the superhero you were currently sharing an elevaor with.

"He's not getting up anytime soon," The Good Captain tells you, " And we've got bigger fish to fry. Are you HYDRA?"

You take a moment, wetting your lips with your tongue before you answer, "It's a long story," You answer honestly, "But not anymore."

You hold your cuffed hands out as his eyes search your face. Finally he brings his shield down, breaking the chain. You bend down, grabbing the pistol of one of the agents before searching the others for extra ammo. Rogers strides forward, opening the elevator. Outside a team of agents stand waiting, weapons trained on the both of you.

"Drop your weapons! Put your hands in the air!" Someone yells, and Rogers twirls in the air, cutting one of the wires of the elevator. You put a hand out, steadying yourself as the elevator drops rapidly, sending you into freefall. After a handful of seconds the breaking mechanism kicks in and the elevator grinds to a halt still a solid six or seven stories above the ground. Rogers goes for the elevator doors again, pulling them open. You're halfway between floors, but you can see the agents running towards the elevator doors.

"Looking for an escape plan?" You lean casually against the fractured glass wall, "Cause there's only one way we're getting out of this." He doesn't hesitate, which you appreciate, he just jumps through the wall of the glass elevator, shield first, and you follow behind him. The wind whips against your swollen face as you fall, stinging the injuries. You cover your face with your arm as you crash through a glass ceiling and then you hit the ground. "Fuck," You breathe shakily, getting one leg beneath you, then the other. As you brush the broken glass from your tactical suit with bleeding hands you look up to see Rogers looking at you with wide eyes.

"Jesus-I would have caught you if you'd given me a chance," He tells you breathlessly, "You shouldn't have been able to survive that."

"We can talk later," You tell him, "We need to move." He nods and starts sprinting off and you follow close behind him as he heads into a garage and climbs aboard a motorcycle. You don't hesitate to climb on behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist. You try not to think about your last motorcycle ride and instead focus on your the steady pulse of blood and adrenaline in your veins. Once again you had managed to escape.

The doors to the garage start to close and Rogers just manages to get between them before they snap shut. In the distance you can see the spike traps rising on the road; overhead a quinjet flies past you before turning to face you in the air, "Stand down Captain Rogers," A voice shouts over a speaker, "Stand down." He leans forward in the seat and you lean with him as the quinjet begins to fire. He evades the bullets and when he's close enough he reaches between you to grab his shield from his back which he frisbees into the propeller of the plane before leaping off the motorcycle and onto the back of the jet.

You slide forward taking the controls and stay as close as you can as he begins hacking at the jet with his retrieved shield. You swerve out of the way as the jet goes down, and he dives off of it, landing on the back of the bike with an impact that almost sends you spiraling out of control but you manage to keep it steady somehow.

"So," You call over the roar of the engine once you're out of the danger zone, "Any reason SHIELD is trying to take out its golden boy?"

You feel the warmth of his breath as he sighs, "Not that I know of. Something's going down. Something big," A shiver runs through you at the familiarity of his words, "I need to get to the hospital, I left something important there."

"Hospital it is," You say with a grimace, "I could probably use one of those about now."


	3. Chapter 3

You stop around the backside of the hospital to change out of your bloody clothes and into the thrift store grabs Rogers had picked up on the way. You use the inside of the flannel to wipe as much of the blood off your face as you can and then pull it on along with a pair of jeans.

"I'm decent," You call quietly, and immediately Rogers rounds the corner, "What do you think? Little less macabre?"

"It's...better. Here," He hands you a pair of sunglasses, and takes your tactical suit and shoves it into his backpack. You slip your pistol into the waistband of your pants and pull the bottom of the flannel over it and then slip on the sunglasses. "That should do it. Ready?"

"Still don't know exactly what we're doing here, but sure. Why not?'

You follow him silently as you walk into the hospital, your eyes subtly watching for the smallest hint that SHIELD and/or HYDRA were already here. After a few minutes Rogers stops, and you watch bemused as he stops at a vending machine.

"Is this really the time?" You ask, and he rolls his eyes before bending down in front of the machine.

"It's gone," He says, standing up with a sigh. "Someone's been here."

Too quiet footsteps have you whirling around, gun in hand. Behind you stands another familiar face from HYDRA's files: Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow. Her posture is that of perfected nonchalance as she blows a bubble with her gum before placing one hand on top of your gun and pushing it towards the floor. "Easy there tiger," She drawls, "I'm not here to fight."

Rogers strides forward, grabbing her and pushing her into an empty room. You follow behind, shutting the door behind you as he questions her. You don't really understand the conversation, but you gather from the context that she has something he wants and he doesn't trust her whatsoever. Understandable, really, as she did have quite the checkered past; not that you were one to talk.

"I know who killed Fury," Romanoff is saying, "Most of the intelligence community doesn't believe he exists. Those who do call him the Winter Soldier," Your head swings around from where you had been watching out the window of the door, "He's credited with over two dozen assassinations in the last fifty years."

"So he's a ghost story," Rogers scoffs, and Romanoff shakes her head.

"Five years ago I was escorting a nuclear engineer out of Iran, somebody shot my tires out near Odessa. We lost control and went straight over a cliff. I pulled us out, but the Winter Soldier was there. I was covering the engineer so he shot him straight through me." She pulls her shirt up to show a scar on the side of her stomach. "Soviet slug, no rifling. Bye-bye bikinis."

"Yeah, I bet you look terrible in them now," Rogers deadpans and Romanoff's lips quirk up.

"Going after him is a dead end," Romanoff says quietly, "I know, I've tried."

"Well you didn't have me before," You push away from the door, "We can find him."

"You know something about this Winter Soldier?" Rogers turns to look at you.

"Yeah," You tell him, "Him and I were partners for a long time."

"Partners?" Romanoff frowns, her eyes shifting to the Captain, "You wanna talk ghost stories look at your new friend. She's probably the biggest specter of them all. If you were the Winter Soldier's partner than that makes you Winter's Shadow."

"I guess it does," You meet her gaze with an impassive one of your own.

"We can talk about that later," Steve says after a deep breath, "For now we should keep moving. We need to find out what's on that drive."

You flip down the sunvisor in the car and look in the small mirror. Besides the bruising under your eyes and the residual dried blood smeared on your face you didn't look too bad. A gentle examination of your nose finds that it wasn't broken after all which was a definite plus. You wipe at the leftover blood and then pop the sunglasses back on. You glance at the entrance of the mall and then back to the glowing green numbers on the dashboard. Almost eight minutes had gone by.

You had been planning on ditching the Good Captain as soon as the opportunity presented itself, but now that the Soldier was involved you knew you needed to stick around, at least for awhile. You snap the sunvisor back into place and lean back in the seat with a sigh. Movement catches your eye and you glance up at the rearview mirror; several back SUVs park behind you, and you recognize Rumlow when he climbs out.

"Shit," You turn your face as they walk by and quickly type a warning message on the phone Romanov had given you. That would have to do. You reach for the gearshift and then hesitate. "Come on," You mutter, wrapping your hand around it, "Time to go." You didn't owe these people anything and certainly not enough to get caught over. You put the car into drive, hesitate again, and then slam it back into park with a curse. You watch out the window and let out a sigh of relief as the two of them burst out of the entrance to the mall, beelining for the car.

"You were right," Romanoff says as they approach the car, "She didn't bolt. Guess I owe you ten bucks." You politely pretend not to have heard that and slide over to the passenger seat. Rogers opens the driver's side door and climbs in.

"Thanks for the heads up in there," Rogers says immediately, pulling away from the curb, "You saved our hides."

You drop your eyes from his face, staring at the ever-increasing speedometer instead, "So what did you find out?"

"The signal is coming from New Jersey." He doesn't say anything else so you turn to look out the window, watching the landscape roll by. As you get on the highway Romanoff leans forward and begins teasing the Captain about his lack of romantic experience while you half listen with growing amusement.

"Believe it or not it's kind of hard to find somebody with shared life experience," Rogers tells her, and you have to hold back a snort. Ain't that the truth.

"Well that's alright," Romanoff tells him, "You just make something up."

"What, like you?" Rogers retorts, and although the remark itself is teasing there's a cool undertone, reminding you of the previous tension between the two of them. You file that away for later consideration.

"I don't know. The truth is a matter of circumstances, it's not all things to all people all the time. And neither am I. Which brings us to the real question," Romanoff says, leaning forward, "What's the Winter Soldier's old partner doing here, with us?" Your jaw clenches; you knew it was only a matter of time before this came up again.

"Rumlow had her," Rogers says, "She helped me break out. Don't think I ever got your name by the way."

"(Y/n)," You say, turning away from the window to look at him.

"Are you sure we should be trusting her?" Romanoff asks, like you're not a foot away from her and he glances at you.

"Can we trust you?"

"I've got no beef with you guys," You tell them, "I had just escaped HYDRA when SHIELD picked me up. I don't know how they found me so quickly."

"Escaped?" Romanoff quirks a brow, "How?"

"It's kind of a long story. I take it you've noticed that I'm… a little more durable than your average person," You say, meeting Roger's blue eyes.

"I noticed," He sounds almost amused, "Some kind of serum, right? We knew HYDRA was experimenting with them back in the day. But we also thought that HYDRA was destroyed." His jaw clenches.

"Not so much, and if I had information to share on the organization, I would gladly hand it over. But they didn't tell us much."

"You and the Winter Soldier," Romanoff says, urging you back on point.

"We were partnered together pretty often. He wasn't the nicest guy you know? Silent, cold. He killed without remorse. But then sometimes after awhile he would...change."

"Change?"

"It was like the Winter Soldier was cracking through and someone else was showing through. Maybe whoever he was before that. I don't know. Sometimes he would remember things about his past. Sometimes he wouldn't. Sometimes when we were out in the field we would talk about running away. Going underground somewhere. Then all of a sudden he would just be the Soldier again. They had him brainwashed, and frequently wiped his memory," You pause, mouth dry, "A week or so ago we were out on a mission. He cut out my tracker and took off, left me in the middle of a field in Wisconsin. He said something was changing and this was my only chance. I tried to get him to come with me but…" You trail off, eyes dropping to your lap as you remembered the heart stopping out of nowhere kiss that the Soldier had left you with.

"So you weren't brainwashed? Why the change of heart then?" Romanoff asks, and you smile.

"I could ask you the same, couldn't I?" Her gaze doesn't waver and you sigh, "I've been with HYDRA since they took me as a young teenager, in what was it….'53?"

"1953?" Rogers cuts in, "There's no way. That would make you what 70? 72?"

"I'm sorry, this coming from you? What are you like a hundred?"

"Close," He smiles, "But there were extenuating circumstances."

"HYDRA freezes it's operatives when they're not in use," You explain, "So that's why I look like I'm in my twenties. Keeps us fresh."

"That's…"

"Awful, yeah. Nothing like being shoved in a freezer and waking up ten years later. Anyways, I'll spare you the gritty details of how I came to be a super assassin, but when it was over...Let's just say I didn't think there was anyway of getting out. So I played nice, because that was my only choice."

"Sorry," Rogers grimaces, and Romanoff falls silent.

After a few hours, Rogers finally breaks the silence, "I don't know what we're getting into here," Outside the window the sign for Jersey flits past, "But it looks pretty serious. If you want to cut and run, we won't stop you." In the mirror you see Romanoff's eyes flicker from your face to his, her expression blank.

You wondered if she would be the one to hunt you down if/when you disappeared. You also wondered if she'd be able to. 50/50. You once again decided that honesty was the best policy when it came to the Good Captain.

"I've been pretty much biding my time until I can find a way to disappear but if the Soldier is involved...Well, I need to stay. He helped me to escape and as poor as my attempt went the least I can do is return the favor."


	4. Chapter 4

"What is this, a military base?" You shut the pick up's door behind you and glance around warily, "It doesn't look like anyone's home."

"The file came from these coordinates," Romanoff holds up her device and looks around

"So did I," Rogers says, and you both look at him curiously. "This camp is where I was trained."

"Changed much?" Romanoff asks.

"A little." Rogers looks up at an empty flagpole before he notices you watching him. He quickly looks away, rubbing at the back of his neck.

You look around for a little while longer before Romanoff sighs, "Well this is a dead end," Romanoff sighs, "Zero heat signatures, zero waves. Not even radio. Whoever wrote the file must have used a router to throw people off."

Rogers starts to nod and then something catches his attention. You follow his eyes to one of the buildings.

"What is it?" Romanoff asks.

"Army regulations forbid storing ammunition within five hundred yards of the barracks," Rogers strides forward and you and Romanoff follow, "This building is in the wrong place."

"Maybe that means it's the right place for us," You say before Rogers strikes the lock with his shield. At the bottom of the staircase Rogers reaches out and hits the light switch; the old fluorescents come on one at a time, illuminating an old SHIELD case. A sense of unease settles over you and a slight shiver runs up your spine as you glance around.

"This is SHIELD," Romanoff states, looking around curiously.

"Maybe where it started," Rogers agrees. You follow behind the two of them as they walk into a second room where framed portraits hang on one wall.

"That's Stark's father."

"Howard," Rogers offers.

"Who's the girl?" Rogers stares at the picture for a second too long before looking away without replying. You follow after him as he walks along a set of shelves before he suddenly pauses, looking around. You watch him, bemused until you notice it; a slight breeze coming from the seam beneath two of the shelves.

"There's something back there," You frown.

"He doesn't reply and turns away, stopping at a bookshelf.

"If you're already working in a secret office…" He pushes the shelf and the old metal reluctantly shudders to the side. You grab the other end and together you easily get it open. Behind the shelf is a door at the end of a short hallway. "Why do you need to hide the elevator?"

You eye the elevator warily before stepping in, Rogers looks at you with something close to amusement and you give him a wry smile, "Still haven't forgotten my last elevator ride."

The three of you step out as the doors open and you internally wince as you hear them shut behind you. You keep moving forward and the lights flicker to life above you automatically. In the center of the room is an old computer.

"This can't be the data-point," Romanoff sounds almost amused, "This technology is ancient."

"Maybe not," You point towards a flash-drive port, and Romanov shoves it in. The computer comes alive around you and the rest of the lights come on, illuminating the vast space around you.

"Initiate system?" A robotic voice asks, as the same words appear on the screen.

Romanov bends down and begins typing. "Y-E-S spells yes," She smiles, "Shall we play a game?-It's from a movie that-"

"Yeah I saw it." Suddenly a voice starts speaking from the speakers as a disjointed green figure appears on the screen.

"Rogers, Steven. Born 1918. Romanoff, Natalia Alianovna. Born 1984. (Y/l/n), (Y/n). Born 1955." You look up to see a camera moving above you.

"Creepy."

"Must be some kind of recording…" Romanoff frowns.

"I am not a recording, Fräulein. I may not be the man I was when the Captain took me prisoner in 1945, but I am-" The screen to the right shows a photograph of a man.

"Do you know this thing?" Romanoff asks, crossing her arms.

"Arnim Zola was a German scientist who worked for the Red Skull. He's been dead for years," Rogers slowly walks around the computer, looking behind it.

"First correction, I am Swiss. Second, look around you. I have never been more alive. In 1972 I received a terminal diagnosis. Science could not save my body. My mind, however, that was worth saving on two hundred thousand feet of data banks. You are standing in my brain."

"Kind of gross," You send Rogers a wink and he gives you an odd look before turning back to the computer.

"How did you get here?"

"Invited." Zola responds.

"It was Operation Paperclip after World War Two. SHIELD recruited German scientists with strategic value." Romanoff tells Steve quietly.

"They thought I could help their cause. I also helped my own."

"We thought HYDRA died with the Red Skull, but," He glances at you, "I guess that's not true."

"Cut off one head, two more shall take its place," You say quietly, as Zola laughs.

"HYDRA was founded on the belief that humanity could not be trusted with its own freedom," Other screens come to life, flashing images of the war, "What we did not realize, was that if you try to take that freedom, they resist. The war taught us much. Humanity needed to surrender its freedom willingly. After the war, SHIELD was founded and I was recruited. The new HYDRA grew. A beautiful parasite inside SHIELD. For seventy years HYDRA has been secretly feeding crisis, reaping war. And when history did not cooperate, history was changed."

"That's impossible, SHIELD would have stopped you." Romanoff says and you frown. If what Zola was saying was true, SHIELD couldn't stop anyone because SHIELD was just HYDRA wearing a different hat.

"Accidents will happen." The computer screen shows a video of a couple in a car murdered by the Winter Soldier, followed by footage of Nick Fury's accident. "HYDRA created a world so chaotic that humanity is finally ready to sacrifice its freedom to gain its security. Once the purification process is complete, HYDRA's new world order will arise. We won, Captain. Your death amounts to the same as your Life; a zero sum." Rogers' fist smashes through the screen, but the man's face flickers to life on another screen. "As I was saying…"

"What's on this drive?" Rogers demands.

"Project Insight requires insight. So I wrote an algorithm."

"What kind of algorithm? What does it do?" Romanoff asks, her voice urgent.

"The answer to your question is fascinating. Unfortunately, you shall be too dead to hear it." You whirl around as metal doors begin to close over the elevator, Rogers tosses his shield but it just clangs loudly against the doors before he catches it back on his arm.

"Steve, we got a bogey," Romanoff breaths. "Short range ballistic. 30 seconds tops."

"Who fired it?"

"S.H.I.E.L.D."

"I am afraid I have been stalling," Romanoff grabs the drive as Rogers looks around frantically, "Captain. Admit it, it's better this way. We're both of us...out of time."

"Rogers!" You drop down, ripping one of the metal grates off the ground. You slide in and just as the explosion erupts around you the other two drop in beside you. You curl into Rogers' side as he holds his shield above his head while debris tumbles down around you. He lets out a cry of effort and you shift, bracing your arm against the underside of his shield taking some of the weight onto your own muscles.

Once everything seems to settle you start pushing on the rubble around you. Together you and Rogers manage to push away the wall directly in front of you. Romanoff lulls to the side, unconscious. Rogers says something but you can't hear him over the ringing in your ears. He repeats it, and you manage to read his lips, "Are you okay?" You nod. He scoops Romanoff up into his arms and steps forward into the wreckage around you.

"Incoming!" You yell as lights appear in the sky overhead, you grab Rogers' arm and pull him in the other direction. You leap over chunks of burning rubble, your ears ringing loudly but you can see Rogers in your peripheral.

Once you're out of range you stop, crouching down out of sight. Rogers leans Romanoff against the tree behind you and crouches down next to you.

You press your lips against his ear, "We need somewhere to lay low. No one connected to SHIELD."

Rogers turns his head to breathe his next words into your ear, "I think I know a place."


	5. Chapter 5

"You're sure we can trust him?" You ask Rogers for what feels like the hundredth time. He just smiles.

"I'm not even sure we can trust you," Romanoff huffs, as the door swings open.

"Hey man." A handsome dark skinned man answers the door.

"I'm sorry about this. We need a place to lay low."

"Everyone we know is trying to kill us." Romanoff chimes in, and you try to give the man a disarming look; at least as well as you can manage while being coated in soot.

He pauses for a moment before replying, "Not everyone," and opens the door fully, letting the three of you pile in. "Bathroom's that way." He offers, "You guys get cleaned up."

You can't help but take your time in the shower, letting the hot water relax your sore muscles and lift the dirt and soot from your skin. You step out when the water running off your body finally runs clear and quickly dry off and get dressed. Your hand stops above the door handle, you can hear Rogers and Romanoff talking quietly on the other side. You wait until their conversation lulls and open the door.

"Well, you look better," Rogers says and you chuckle.

"You should see me on a day where I don't almost die eighty times," You tell him dryly, "I'm just happy to know how SHIELD found me so fast. They were on me the moment the Soldier reported back to HYDRA without me."

A quiet knocking interrupts you, and you all turn to see the stranger standing in the doorway, "I made breakfast," He announces, "If you guys eat that sort of thing. Sam Wilson by the way."

"(Y/n)," You tell him.

"Vague," Sam grins, "Mysterious. I like."

"She's ex-HYDRA. A super-soldier, like me," Rogers says.

"Strong and sexy," Sam's grin grows even wider, while your roll your eyes.

"Didn't you say something about breakfast, Romeo?" You ask pointedly.

You eagerly tear into the food, and when you finally glance up your three companions are looking at you with slightly alarmed looks. "Sorry," You say through a mouthful of bacon, "Literally cannot remember the last time I had hot food."

Romanoff looks at you for a few more seconds before she slides the remainder of her food over to you. Her gaze leaves you and falls on Rogers. "Anyways, the question is who in SHIELD could launch a domestic missile strike."

"Pierce." Rogers says without hesitation. You start on Romanoff's plate, half listening to the two of them talk until Sam drops a file on the table in front of Rogers. You lean over, curiously to look. "What's this?"

"Call it a resume."

Romanoff picks up a photo of Sam with his para-rescue team and eyes it curiously, "Is this Bakhmala? The Khalid Khandil mission, that was you. You didn't say he was a para-rescue," She tells Rogers, her tone accusatory.

"Is that Riley?" Steve asks, and your eyes narrow in confusion.

"Yeah."

"I heard they couldn't bring in the choppers because of the RPGs. What did you use, a stealth chute?" Romanoff presses.

"No. These." Sam flips to another photo and you let out a low whistle.

"Cool wings, bird boy."

"I thought you said you were a pilot," Rogers says, turning to look at Sam.

"I never said pilot."

"I can't ask you to do this Sam. You got out for a good reason."

"Dude, Captain America needs my help. There's no better reason to get back in. Plus we don't see ladies like this down at the VFW." Rogers chuckles and shakes his head.

"So where can we get one of those?"

"The last one is at Fort Meade, behind three guarded gates and a twelve-inch steel wall." Rogers glances over at Romanoff who shrugs.

"Shouldn't be a problem."

You curl up in an armchair with a hot cup of tea while Rogers and Romanoff start coming up with a plan. You watch the clouds move across the rapidly darkening sky and for the first time, it really hits you. You escaped. You escaped, and not only that but you were working with the _good_ guys to do _good_. You raise one hand slightly to look at it, your lips drawn into a thin line. You knew there was too much blood on your hands to ever even begin to wash it off, and you didn't even have the excuse of being brainwashed to try and rationalize it, but maybe… Maybe you could atone for some of it.

"There's nothing you can't come back from," You glance up as Sam sits down across from you, "That's what you were thinking about right? The things you've done? I know the look."

"I wonder if you really believe that," You murmur, setting down your tea, "The wars your veterans fought in? I've started them. I've slit men's throats in front of their children. Slaughtered whole families. No hesitation. And if tomorrow I was recaptured? I'd do it all over again. That makes me a monster."

If he's surprised by your words he doesn't give any indication as your eyes search his face. After a moment he just gives you a small smile, "It doesn't. But your guilt does make you human." You're on your feet before he can even register your movement, your gun in your hand and pointed at his head. Sam doesn't flinch, but Rogers and Romanoff are on their feet half a second later, wearing matching expressions of surprise. You click the safety back on with a small smile, lowering the weapon.

"Just a little test," You say mostly to the two Avenger's ready to strike, "You've got some balls Sam, I'll give you that." His lips quirk up, behind him the other's relief is almost palpable.

"(Y/n)," Rogers says with a slight grimace, "Please uh...don't do that."

"Aye aye Captain," You holster your gun with a smile, "Wake me up when it's go time."

As you leave the room you hear Romanoff murmur, "I don't know Steve, she's kinda growing on me."


	6. Chapter 6

"Okay, you know what you're doing?" Rogers asks you and you roll your eyes.

"Yeah, I think I've got it Captain." You lean against the wall of the high rise, "I'll be waiting on the roof."

"And?"

"Jesus, I won't shoot him," You huff, "I mean, unless he tries to run. And then like only in the leg-or the stomach. Stomach would give you time to question...him…" You trail off, "Right, yeah, okay, no shooting. Only threatening. Got it."

You set up on the roof bracing the rifle against the concrete barrier around the edge of the perimeter. You test the scope, first finding Sam sitting at a table in a small outdoor cafe and then you swing over to the restaurant where the mark-Sitwell-was eating lunch according to Roger's intel.

The door to the restaurant opens and you immediately locate the man you're looking for, keeping him locked in your sights as he descends the stairs, talking to an older man.

"(Y/n), you got eyes?" Romanoff's voice crackles in your earpiece.

"Got him."

The older man whispers something in Sitwell's ear before walking away. "Making the call," Sam says quietly. Sitwell waves away the men still standing around him and then picks up the phone; you can hear Sam's side of the conversation through your earpiece. "Agent Sitwell, how was lunch? I hear the crab cakes here are delicious… The good looking guy in the sunglasses, your ten o'clock." You hold back a snort, "Your other ten o'clock. There you go. You're gonna go around the corner to your right, there's a grey car, two spaces down. You and I are gonna take a ride."

At that you flip a switch near the trigger, and a red dot appears centered on Sitwell's tie, his eyes drop to his chest and then he looks around nervously.

You take a seat on the concrete barrier, resting your gun in your lap and wait. A few minutes later the doors fly open and Sitwell comes bursting through, rolling across the pavement. Rogers doesn't give him a second, as the man scrambles to his feet Roger's strides towards him, Romanoff close on his heels, "Tell me about Zola's algorithm," Rogers says, forcing the man backwards.

"Never heard of it."

"What were you doing on the Lemurian Star?" Rogers demands.

"I was throwing up-" Sitwells legs hit the concrete barrier next to where you sit, he shoots you a nervous glance, "I get seasick." Rogers grabs his jacket, forcing him almost over the edge and then a nasty little smile comes onto Sitwell's face. "Is this little display meant to insinuate that you're gonna throw me off the roof? Because that's not really your style Rogers."

"You're right," Rogers steps back, "It's not. It's hers." He looks at Romanoff and without missing a beat she kicks the man hard in the chest, sending him flying off the rooftop. You lean over, watching as he falls.

"Oh, wait," Romanoff says casually, "What about that girl from accounting? Laura…?"

"Lillian," Rogers corrects her, "Lip piercing right?"

"Yeah," Romanoff smiles, "She's cute."

"Yeah, I'm not ready for that."

Behind you you feel a sudden rush of air and then Sam soars overhead, dropping a screaming Sitwell onto the pavement before landing neatly a few feet from him, wings retracting. You follow Rogers and Romanoff as they approach the shaking man as he tries to get to his feet.

"Zola's algorithm is a program," Sitwell burst out, still on his hands and knees with one hand held out in front of him, "For choosing Insight's targets!"

"What targets?" Rogers asks. You frown, the name 'Insight' resonated with you for some reason. You felt like you had heard it before. Then again if SHIELD and HYDRA were practically the same organization then it made sense that you might have heard something about it. Unfortunately nothing more than a faint sense of recognition came to mind.

"You! A TV anchor in Cairo, the Undersecretary of Defense, a high school valedictorian in Iowa City. Bruce Banner, Stephen Strange, anyone who's a threat to HYDRA. Now, or in the future."

"The future?" Steve repeats, confused, "How could it know?"

Sitwell chuckles, rising to his feet, "How could it not? The 21st century is a digital book. Zola taught HYDRA how to read it," Rogers and Romanoff share a look, while Sitwell continues, "Your bank records. Medical histories. Voting patterns, emails, phone calls, your damn SAT scores. Zola's algorithm evaluates people's pasts to predict their futures."

"And what then?" Rogers demands.

"Oh my god," Sitwell breathes suddenly, "Pierce is going to kill me."

"I think you should be more worried about us at the moment," You swing the barrel of your rifle around, leveling it at his head, "Answer the damn question."

"Then the Insight Helicarriers scratch people off the list. A few million at a time."

It's a little cramped with three of you in the backseat; your gun rests across your lap as Sam drives to the Triskelion and you watch as Sitwell's eyes keep drifting to it. "HYDRA doesn't like leaks," Sitwell starts again and you roll your eyes.

"So why don't you try sticking a cork in it," Sam offers; you can see his scowl in the rear-view mirror.

Romanoff leans forward, "Insight's launching in sixteen hours, we're cutting it a little close here."

"I know," Rogers sighs, "We'll use him to bypass the DNA scans and access the Helicarriers directly." Beside you Sitwell stiffens.

"What? Are you crazy? That's a terrible, terrible idea-" Your hand tightens around your gun as something hits the roof with a loud thud; a fraction of a second later a familiar metal arm crashes through the window next to you and grabs Sitwell, yanking him over you through the window and tossing him into oncoming traffic. A bullet whizzes through the roof of the car and Romanoff scrambles into the passenger seat while you flatten yourself against the door.

"Brake!" You shout before Steve throws the car into park and the car skids to a sudden stop, throwing the Soldier off the car. You watch as he slows himself with his arm and then stands upright, face covered with a black mask. Something hits the car from behind-another car-pushing the car forward. Before you the Soldier he leaps into the air, landing back on top of your car.

Sam slams on the brakes, "Shit!" He yells as the Soldier reaches through the broken windshield and rips out the steering wheel. Romanoff fires through the roof and you reach forward, grabbing her wrist.

"Don't shoot him," You tell her, as he leaps onto the car behind you, "I got this!"

"(Y/n), no-" Rogers starts, but you're already out the window, climbing onto the roof of the car. The Soldier stands on the hood of the black SUV behind you, and when it makes contact with the bumper of Sam's car you leap forward, tackling the Soldier into the road.

You both roll several feet before you manage to get to your feet, "Do you recognize me?" You ask as the two of you face off.

"You're (Y/n)," He says, and you're almost glad you can't see his face because his voice is completely emotionless, "You were my partner. You attacked me to get away and betrayed HYDRA."

You blink, surprised. You had expected them to wipe his memory, not feed him some bullshit story, "You helped me get away," You tell him stubbornly, "You cut out my tracker and told me to run. Please. Let me help you now. Let me help you get away."

Another SUV cuts across the road, and several men get out, one of the throws the Soldier a grenade launcher.

"Oh fuck-" You dive over the edge of the overpass as he fires. You fall over the side, and almost make it down before a truck just barely knicks you, sending you tumbling towards the side of the road, arm screaming in protest. "Shit," You breathe. You brace yourself against one of the concrete support pillars and pop your shoulder back into its socket.

Immediately three men converge on your position and you duck behind the pillar, pulling your rifle. You count to three in your head and then roll out, ducking behind a nearby car and open fire, hitting all three of the men with deadly accuracy. You can hear gunfire nearby and you sprint in that direction, sliding over cars as you pass them.

"Out of the way," You hear Romanoff call, "Get out of the way!" You come around the corner in time to see the Soldier shoot Romanoff. You run past her, leaping over the car she's ducking behind and tackle the Soldier away from her.

"I did not betray you," You tell him as you dodge the punch he throws in your direction, "Just listen to me Soldier, I can explain everything if you'll just come with me," For a split second he pauses, and then he grabs you by the neck, slamming you into the wall of a nearby building. "I really don't want to hurt you," You force out with your remaining air. You grab his metal arm with both of yours, straining as you push it away enough to give yourself some room, "But I will." You slam your head forward into his, catching your breath as he stumbles backwards, the mask tumbling from his face.

"Bucky?" Rogers who had been coming to assist you freezes, staring at the Soldier.

The Soldier looks from you to Rogers, confused, "Who the hell is Bucky?" He raises his gun and you shove Rogers out of the way, the bullet flying so close to your ear you feel the air displacement. You duck behind Roger's shield as the Soldier empties his clip and then Sam swoops in, kicking the Soldier off his feet. Sam lands behind you and you ready your rifle; if you have to put one in his leg to put him down so be it.

"Duck!" You hear Romanoff shout, and then a grenade flies over your head towards the soldier.

"No!" You cover your face as a wave of debris flies over you, "Where did he go?" You demand, stepping forward into the smoke.

Sirens erupt around you as SHIELD agents surround the area, guns at the ready.

"Drop the shield Cap! Weapons on the ground-all of you," Rumlow says, "On your knees! Get down!" He kicks out Steve's leg and Steve falls to his knees. Someone grabs the back of your neck roughly and shoves you to the ground before kicking your gun away from you.

"Get your hand off me," You growl, "And I might consider letting your family live."

"Hey-" Rumlow stomps over to you, "Do yourself a favor, and shut the fuck up." He swings his gun back and then slams it into your mouth. You smile up at him as blood streams from your split lip.

"I can't wait to kill you Rumlow," You tell him quietly, "I'm going to-" He swings the gun again, this time smashing into your cheekbone.

"Get them in the van," He says, walking away, "Now!"


	7. Chapter 7

"That was smart," Sam deadpans, "That make you feel better?"

"A little," You snap, bringing your handcuffed hands up to wipe the blood away from your mouth. Rogers sits next to you staring at his cuffed hands with slumped shoulders. You glance at the guard warily before leaning closer to him, your shoulder bumping his. "Talk to me Rogers," You say as gently as you can, "You recognized him. The Soldier."

He doesn't respond at first, just keeps staring at his lap. Finally, when you're about to give up he lifts his head, meeting your curious gaze. "I knew him. His name is Bucky Barnes. We grew up together. We served together. But he looked at me like he didn't even know me."

"How's that even possible?" Sam demands, "It was like seventy years ago."

"Zola. Bucky's whole unit was captured in '43. Zolar experimented on him. Whatever he did must have helped Bucky survive the fall. They must have found him and…"

"None of that's your fault, Steve," Romanoff assures him, but he shakes his head.

"Even when I had nothing I had Bucky."

"They wiped his memory and brainwashed him. It makes sense that he wouldn't recognize you," You remind Rogers.

"Yeah, speaking of, didn't really seem like your boyfriend was happy to see you," Romanoff says archly, but you can hear a tremor in her voice. You look at her pale ashen face and the blood leaking from her shoulder with concern.

"We need to get a doctor here," Sam looks at the guards, "We don't put pressure on that wound and she's gonna bleed out here in the truck."

One of the guards pulls out an electric rod and you tense, ready for the oncoming attack. To your surprise the guard attacks the second guard and pulls the helmet from their head, revealing themselves to be a young woman. "Ahh," She sighs in relief, "That thing was squeezing my brain. I see you've made some new friends Cap. You're all coming with me."

You lean against the wall outside the hospital room as Romanoff and Rogers approach Nick Fury's bedside. You expected the director of SHIELD to be good but not survive an assassination from the Winter Soldier and fake his own death good.

"So you were pretty good out there," Sam says as he moves to stand next to you, "Not bad at all."

"Thanks for the review," You tell him, your lips curling up at the corners, "You seemed pretty rusty yourself. But I mean, you were retired for awhile right? I'm sure you don't see a lot of _action_ these days."

"Damn girl, you're ice cold, you know that?" Sam shakes his head in mock offense before his expression sobers, "You okay though?"

"Sorry, I'm confused here. Are you trying to be my therapist or are you trying to fuck me?" You cock your head, "It's coming off a little weird that you want to do both."

Sam seems unfazed, "I just know that couldn't have been easy for you. Him thinking you were the enemy."

"Sam," You say gently, "Let me tell you something." You lean in closer, your voice dropping so only he could hear you, "Remember earlier when I pulled that gun on you? You didn't flinch because you thought you _knew_ I wouldn't pull the trigger. You were wrong. Don't get me wrong, I'd prefer not to kill you. But that's all that is. A preference," You can hear Rogers coming down the hallway and drop your voice even lower, "So next time you feel like trying to psychoanalyze me ask yourself, 'would I prefer to stay alive?' and if the answer is yes, shut your fucking mouth." You clap him on the shoulder and turn away as Rogers enters.

"So what's going on?"

"Nothing good," Rogers runs a hand through his hair wearily, "Come on. Fury's got some information for us."

"This man declined the Nobel Peace Prize. He said, 'Peace wasn't an achievement, it was a responsibility.'" Nick Fury tells you all, looking at a photo of Pierce, "See it's stuff like this that gives me trust issues."

"We have to stop the launch," Romanoff says, ignoring his anecdote.

"I don't think the Council's accepting my calls anymore," Fury turns and opens a case containing three chips.

"What's that?" Sam asks.

"Once the Helicarriers reach three thousand feet, they'll triangulate with Insight satellites before becoming fully weaponized. We need to breach those carriers and replace their targeting blades with our own." Fury says.

"But one or two won't cut it. We need to link all three carriers for this to work, because if even one of those ships remains operational a whole lot of people are going to die," The agent-Hill continues.

"We have to assume everyone aboard those carriers is HYDRA," Fury says, "We need to get past them, insert the server blades, and maybe, just maybe, we can salvage what's left…"

"We aren't salvaging anything," Rogers cuts in, "We're not just taking down the carriers Nick, we're taking down SHIELD."

"SHIELD had nothing to do with it," Fury states, but Rogers is not having it.

"You gave me this mission, this is how it ends. SHIELD has been compromised, you said so yourself. HYDRA grew right under your nose and nobody noticed."

"Why do you think we're meeting in this cave?" Fury demands, "I noticed."

"And how many paid the price before you did?" Rogers' fists clench, and Fury sighs.

"Look, I didn't know about Barnes."

"Even if you had would you have told me? Or would you have compartmentalized that too? SHIELD, HYDRA, it all goes."

"He's right." Hill tells Fury gravely. Fury looks from Romanoff to Sam to you, and Sam shrugs.

"Don't look at me, I do what he does, just slower." Sam quips.

"Do we really have time for this?" You interrupt and Fury sighs.

"Well...Looks like you're giving the orders now, Captain."

"(Y/n)," Rogers holds you back before you head off. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

"What's up?"

"I know I said this before but now…" Rogers frowns, "Look, I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. If you want to take off, I understand. I'm sure you walking into a HYDRA stronghold isn't your idea of a good time, and if we survive this, I'll help you to start over, if you want."

"I appreciate the sentiment," You tell him, "But Sitwell was right, HYDRA doesn't like leaks. I've been seen with you. There's a pretty solid chance that they've put my name in the Project Insight algorithm. I might as well go down swinging. So I'm with you, till the end of the line Steve." You turn to walk away and he grabs your shoulder bruisingly hard, spinning you back towards him, "Rogers, what the hell-"

"What did you just say?" He demands, still gripping your shoulder.

"I said I would fucking help you," You snap, slapping his hand off of you, "What's your problem?

"Right. Yes. Sorry," Steve shakes his head and takes a deep breath, "Till the end of the line. It's something Buck and I used to say to each other."

You freeze for a moment and then the words rush out of your mouth,"The Soldier used to say it sometimes too," A smile spreads across your face, "The same thing. That's where I picked it up Steve, from _him_."

"He's still in there," Rogers says weak with relief, a smile on his own lips.


	8. Chapter 8

You freeze as Steve is almost thrown off the side of the Helicarrier by the Soldier. The Soldier grabs Sam by one of his wings and throws him to the ground.

"Sam!" You call into the headset, "Do not engage! Repeat, do not engage! Get me up there!" It's silent for a moment and you shift nervously before Sam dives off the edge, avoiding fire from the Soldier. Sam grabs you around the waist before soaring upwards, towards the Helicarrier. A wire shoots past you and hits one of Sam's wings, yanking him to the ground with you trapped beneath him. You hear a metallic groan as one of his wings are ripped off and then he's off of you, flying off the edge of the carrier. You grab the Soldier's leg, yanking him to the ground and roll on top of him, pinning him down with your weight.

"Will you just listen for a second?" You growl as he struggles, "I'm not your-" The Soldier slams his head forward his eyes meeting yours before his forehead hits your nose with a sickening crunch. You weren't aware of releasing his arm until the metal one comes up and hits your jaw, sending you skidding back on to the pavement with dark spots blooming in front of your eyes.

Dimly you can hear Sam and Steve talking through your headset. They were both okay. That was good. You try and blink away the spots in your vision, and you succeed in time to see the Soldier hovering above you, gun in hand. You roll to the side as he fires two shots where your head had been just moments before and scramble to your feet. You grab his wrist as he fires another shot, aiming it down while you swing your elbow around to catch his jaw.

The soldier swings his leg and catches yours, but you use your momentum as you go down to knock his feet out from under him as well. You grab his metal arm and twist it behind his back, pinning him down once again. "Come on," You tell him, "You know me. We're partners-" Wiggling his free arm loose he flips himself over, landing on top of you and knocking the wind out of you. He slams his head backwards, nailing you again, and then he's on his feet, gun pointed in your direction. His eyes watch you warily as you look up at him, panting.

"I know you're probably confused-" You cut off with a sharp cry as he pulls the trigger. Your tactical suit had been due for repair before you had taken your leave of HYDRA, and at this point was looking threadbare at best. His bullet went right through the material and into the meat of your thigh, leaving a trail of white hot pain in its wake.

"Stay down."

You let your head fall back onto the hard pavement beneath you as he turns and walks away, your leg burning with agonizing pain. In your earpiece you can hear the sound of Steve engaging the Soldier down below and you wince as you push yourself up into a sitting position. You slip your combat knife from the holster on your thigh and cut a strip of fabric from the arm of the top layer of your tactical suit. You steel yourself against the pain as you methodologically tie it around the bullet wound, pulling it taught as to slow the flood of blood.

You take a deep breath before you slowly climb to your feet, testing your injured limb. Putting weight on it was agonizing; but you force the sensation to the back of your mind. You would have plenty of time to lick your wounds later if you survived this, if not, well it wouldn't bother you for much longer anyway.

You spot the pair of soldiers on the lower level, just in time to see the Solder heave Steve's shield at him, sending him tumbling backwards. You take a deep breath and let it out before you throw yourself over the edge to the bottom of the carrier. Your leg collapses the moment you land and you hit the ground, pain shooting up your hip as it hits a metal rivet in the flooring.

You hear bullets ringing off of Steve's shield and you force yourself up again. As you approach you see that Steve's gained the upper hand as he has the Soldier pinned to the ground. Once the Soldier drops the chip Steve rises to his feet, and sees you.

"Go!" You shout to him, "I've got him." You drop down to your knees next to him, rolling him over onto his back. You push back his hair, pressing two fingers against the flesh of his neck. A steady throb meets your gently probing and you let out a sigh of relief.

His fist hits your jaw like a freight truck and sends you tumbling to the side. You start to get up and he puts another bullet, this one in your abdomen, just above your hip bone. You fumble for your gun and he kicks it away from you, leaving two of your fingers broken. Satisfied, he turns away from you and begins firing at Steve. From the sound he makes, at least some of them hit their mark.

"Soldier," You call, your hand pressed to your hip. He glances back at you and you give him a shaky smile, "I know you know I'm not your enemy. Otherwise you would have killed me topside."

"You belong to HYDRA. You'll be taken back in."

You snort weakly at that, "Bullshit. You have orders to kill me on sight. I know how HYDRA operates. But you didn't. You know me. Now let us save you."

The Soldier stares at you for a moment before he turns away and fires another shot; this time Steve collapses, a red stain blooming on the fabric of his suit. You're out of time; before the Soldier can take another shot you pull your tactical knife and bury it into the meat of his calf. He lets out a cry of surprise and falls to one knee next to you. Steve struggles to his feet and shoves the chip into place, immediately you hear Hill in your ear, "Okay guys, get out of there."

Steve looks down at you on the ground, and his face looks white against the blood flowing from the corner of his mouth. You nod at your injury and shake your head.

"Fire now," Steve responds, his voice breathless.

"But Steve-"

"Do it!" Steve snaps, "Do it now!" As the first shot rings out the Soldier launches into action once again. He pulls the knife from his leg and tosses it away from you before grabbing you by your throat and lifting you to your feet. The helicarrier shudders as it's hit and metal starts falling around you. You manage to twist out of the Soldier's grip and throw yourself backwards. The pain when you hit the ground threatens to overwhelm you but you keep moving, rolling out of the way as a twisted car sized piece of metal hits the ground just inches away from where you had landed a few seconds earlier.

You start to get to your feet and something hits you in the back, pinning you onto your stomach. You can see the Soldier several feet away, struggling under a large piece of fallen rubble; he meets your eyes and you can see the first vestiges of fear in his own. Steve stumbles to your level and starts in your direction.

"Get him," You shout, waving him away with the arm not trapped at your side, "I'm fine!"

He looks at you once doubtfully before heading in the direction of his old friend. You try to stand up but can't lift the metal that had you pinned. Instead you twist your body, testing your range of movement. You manage to get one foot cocked under you and you slowly push your way forward. The wounds on your hip and thigh scream in protest as your drag them across the ground and your fingers are white hot as you push them into the ground to give yourself the leverage you need to escape.

"You know me," You hear Steve say and you look over to see the Soldier freed from the rubble.

"No I don't!" The Soldier screams in response, lunging forward and hitting Steve hard. Steve stumbles but stays on his feet.

"Bucky," He tries again, "You've known me your whole life." The Soldier swings again and you resume your efforts to free yourself.

"Your name is James Buchanan Barnes," Steve pants.

"Shut up!" The hits him a third time, and for the third time Steve climbs to his feet.

"Steve!" You shout, halfway out now, "Just go!"

He ignores you, "I'm not going to fight you," You watch in horror as he drops his shield and it falls through a hole in the bottom of the carrier, "You're my friend."

With a cry the Soldier rushes him, tackling him to the ground, "You're my mission!" He says, before pounding his fist into Steve's jaw repeatedly, "You're. My. Mission!"

"Then finish it," Steve says quietly and you watch surprised as the Soldier hesitates, arm cocked back, "Cause I'm with you to the end of the line."

You finally slip out and you cross the space between you in them in two short strides, tackling the Soldier away from Steve before he could decide whether he was going to finish it after all. When the two of you hit the ground the floor beneath you gives way, sending you three of you tumbling from the carrier.

The water feels like cement when you hit it and you flail uselessly as your try to right yourself. The force of your tackle had knocked the wind out of you and you hadn't had time to catch your breath and you pay for that now as you inadvertently take a breath, breathing down water. Lungs and throat burning you make a last ditch effort and propel yourself in a random direction, praying it was the surface. You hit something in the water, probably a piece of the ship and know you hadn't been heading in the right direction; black butterflies bloom in front of your eyelids and you let your body go slack. This was okay. You were dying, but you could accept that.

It was disorienting to say the least when your head breaches the surface. You let out a sputtering cough, water pouring from your mouth as you empty your lungs of the cool liquid. It took a second to realize that you were being dragged to shore. You peel open your burning eyes and see the blue of the Captain's uniform. He was okay. You were okay.

The Soldier drops you onto the sand and you can't help the whimpering sigh that escapes your lips as your injuries are once again jostled.

"You know we're not your enemies," You tell him, your voice coming out soft and raspy, "You wouldn't have pulled us out otherwise. Please. Let us help you," Your voice breaks, "Let me help you. Soldier. Please."

He just stares at you with the slightly broken expression of your Soldier before he turns away. "No!" You try and climb to your feet but your leg won't hold you and you tumble back down, "Do not leave me here!" You let out an angry scream that feels like it rips open your throat, but he doesn't turn back.

You let out something between a scream and a sob before you turn your attention back to Steve. You pull yourself over to him and to your relief you can see he's still breathing. You pull him half into your lap, pressing your hands over the injuries you can see. "It's okay Steve, you're okay," You tell his unconscious body, not sure if you were trying to comfort him or yourself, "Somebody's gonna get here soon to help you, I promise."

While Steve was shipped off to a hospital, Natasha patches you up in a nearby motel. "I'm not a doctor you know," She reminds you as she finishes the stitches in your hip.

"I'm not big on doctors anyway," You sit up as she rolls backwards in the office chair to toss her bloodied gloves into the trash can. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it," She turns towards the door, "I'm going to advise Rogers not to go after him," She pauses, "And I like you, so I'm going to advise you to do the same."

"He's not going to listen to you," You tell her.

"And neither are you," She turns to smile at you, "I'm sure we'll see each other soon."

""We've been data-mining HYDRA's files. Looks like a lot of rats didn't go down with the ship. I'm headed to Europe tonight, wanted to ask if you'd come." Why Fury wanted to meet you guys at his own grave, you'd never understand.

"There's something I gotta do first." Steve says, and Fury nods.

"How about you Wilson? Could use a man with your abilities."

"I'm more of a soldier than a spy."

"(Y/n)?"

"I've had enough HYDRA for a lifetime." You tell him, "I think I'm just going to lay low for awhile."

"Alright then," Fury says, and shakes each of your hands, "Anybody asks for me, tell them they can find me right here." As he walks away, Romanoff walks over.

"You should be honored," She tells Steve, "That's about as close as he gets to saying thank you."

"You're not going with him?"

"No." She smiles.

"Not staying here?"

"I blew all my covers. I gotta go figure out a new one."

"That might take awhile."

Natasha smiles, "I'm counting on it. That thing you asked for, I called in a few favors from Kiev," She hands Steve a file, "Will you do me a favor? Call that nurse."

"She's not a nurse."

"And you're not a SHIELD agent," Romanoff counters.

"What was her name again?"

"Sharon. She's nice." She leans up and plants a kiss on Steve's cheek. "Be careful Steve. You might not want to pull on that thread." As she walks away Steve opens the file, and you catch a glimpse of the Soldier's face.

"You're going after him?" Sam asks, and Steve looks up.

"You don't have to come with me."

"I know. When do we start?" Sam grins and you feel your own lips rise in a smile.

"I think now is a pretty good time," You say, and Steve looks at you in surprise, "Don't look at me like that. We're both looking for him. Might as well look together." Steve claps the hand not in a sling onto your shoulder, giving it a light squeeze.

"Thank you."


	9. Chapter 9

"Hey (Y/n)," Steve greets you as you walk up the path towards the towering building, a large 'A' suspended on the side. "Long time no see."

"Don't tell me you're missing me now," You respond with a sarcastic weariness, "I'd come around more but I'm technically a terrorist in the eyes of the United States government."

"Well you're safe here," Steve leads you inside, "Where have you been?"

"Mmm, all over really. Afghanistan, Colombia, Hungary, Syria. Bust on bust on bust," You sigh.

"Looks like you ran into some trouble though," Steve gestures towards the half-healed bruised ring around your left eye, "You getting slow?"

"Ha ha," You laugh humorlessly as you follow Steve into the elevator, "You should see the other guys. Actually you'd probably prefer not to. Turns out I did a hit on some cartel guy last time I was in South America and _apparently_ his son was out for revenge. Nothing I couldn't handle," You assure him.

"I'm sure," Steve says leading you into a living room, "So you really have been all over… Afghanistan? Syria?"

"Not my first choices for vacation spots," You unshoulder your pack and drop it onto the table, "And complete wastes of time. Hungary on the other hand was also a bust, but I did come across something that you might be interested in."

"Excuse me," A voice interrupts you, and you swing around, pistol clenched in your hand as you stare down the sights at a familiar face. You can't place it at first until he continues, "Okay kid, I'm not really a fan of people pointing guns at me in my own place so put it down before I make you put it down."

"Right. Sorry," You drop your weapon back into your thigh holster, giving Stark what you hope is a charming smile, "Force of habit."

It doesn't work. "Rogers, care to explain the armed street urchin?"

"Tony, this is (Y/n)," Steve frowns, "Remember? She helped me with that Insight situation awhile back?"

"Rings a bell," Stark nods, "But I'm still not really getting why you have an ex-HYDRA operative dripping filth onto my floor. Not to mention the fact that she shouldn't even have been able to get in here with the security protocols, Jarvis?"

"Oh, can it Stark," A lilting voice says, pushing past Stark, "I gave her access, per the Captain."

"Romanoff," You smile at the new arrival.

"Word on the street is _someone_ took down a Columbian drug syndicate. And you didn't invite me?"

"Sorry, it was a little last minute. Next time I'll be sure to call."

"Promises, promises," Romanoff's lips quirk up.

A low whistle comes from the doorway and you turn your head to see Sam leaning against the doorframe, "I must have died and gone to heaven," You raise your eyebrows, "Cause you're an angel if I've ever seen one."

"I hate your new friends," Stark tells Steve, "You," He points a finger in your direction, "Don't touch anything."

"Charming," You note as Stark walks out of the room.

"Yeah, sorry about that," Steve runs a hand through his hair, "He can be a little…"

"I get it. I wouldn't trust me either. You guys are insane," You give them a wry smile, "Now, you're sure this room is secure?"

"Stark's probably listening in but otherwise," Steve gestures for you to continue and you nod.

"No word on our frosty friend, but I did hear something in my travels. Rumors on a certain missing scepter."

"Loki's scepter?" Steve asks, eyes widening.

"I mean how many scepters from outer space do you come by on an average day? I couldn't dig too deep cause-you know-gotta fly under the radar, but I heard tell of a handful of HYDRA outposts who may have had the scepter at one point or another."

"Beautiful and brilliant," Sam flashes a smile and you toss him the file.

"I know you said your team's been doing raids so you may have already hit a few. But hopefully that information can narrow down your list."

"This is...great," Steve says, scanning the file after Sam hands it over, "I'll get this info to Stark. Any place in particular you have a good feeling about?"

"Well…" You tap your bottom lip with your index finger, "Take a look at Sokovia. I'd say of any of the places it's got a lot of red flags."

"Thank you for this," Steve says seriously.

"Glad to be of assistance," You tell him, "I'll let you know if I find anything else." You grab the strap of your pack and swing in onto your back.

"You're taking off again?" Natasha asks, a slight frown on her lips.

"You know me, always moving," You smile, "Besides, I have a feeling Stark's hospitality is already growing thin. Not to mention I have dozens of ice cold leads to follow up on."

"We could use an extra set of hands," Steve says, "Let Sam take point on your other leads and you can stay a few weeks. Take some down time. I'll deal with Stark."

"I don't know if I would consider storming HYDRA bases to be downtime," You joke. No one laughs. "Steve," You sigh, "I'm not an 'Avenger'."

"I know, I know," Steve nods his head sheepishly, "I'm not asking you to join up. I'm just asking for your help. Friend to friend."

You look over at Sam, "You think you can handle it?"

"Your ice cold leads?" Sam scoffs, "Yeah, I think I'll manage."

You chew at the inside of your cheek as you consider Steve's offer before sighing, "Fine. I'll stick around for a week or two. Happy?"

"Getting there," Steve grins, "Come on, I'll show you where you'll be staying."


	10. Chapter 10

A scream rips through the air and your eyes snap open as the door to the room slams open and the light is on. Instinctively you grab the gun from beneath your pillow, turning the safety off and cocking it in one smooth motion.

"(Y/n)?!" The voice brings you back to reality and you thumb the safety back on before letting the gun drop from your shaking hands. Between the soft pants escaping your lips and the hammering of your heart in your chest you quickly realize what had happened; the scream had been you.

"Jesus christ Steve," You say weakly, "I almost shot you."

"Are you alright?" He moves the gun to the nightstand and sits on the edge of the bed. You hide your hands under the blanket so he can't see them shake.

"I'm fine, I just-" You pause, trying to think of a reasonable reason you were screaming in the middle of the night.

"Nightmares?" Steve offers, and you slowly nod, "I get them too. I think the first month after I came out of the ice I woke up screaming every night."

"That must have been difficult."

"I never expected to wake up. And to wake up after so long… Everyone I knew was dead, and I was grieving for someone who died sixty-six years before. Well. At least I thought he did." Steve sighs.

"What happened to him?"

"We were in a fire fight on this train, trying to stop HYDRA and he fell. I tried to reach him but I was too late. If I would have thought even for a second he could still be alive I would never have left. Even after the serum I don't know how he could have survived that fall." Steve chuckles suddenly, "I remember after I rescued him from HYDRA we were in this bar, celebrating. This woman I knew, Peggy Carter, shot him down. Don't think it had ever happened to him before, he said he was turning into me."

Your lips curl into a smile, "Yeah?" You nod, "He was a ladies man? I can see it."

"Do you think he's still the same person in there?" His jaw clenches as if he's trying to retroactively take back the words.

You lower your gaze, taking a moment to find the right words. "No. How could he be? Are you the same person you were before going into the ice?" Steve's lips press together, "But… That doesn't mean he's not still your Bucky. He was quiet. Reserved. Charming at times," You smile, "Sometimes I would even go as far as to say he kept a sense of humor. A bad one, but, you know." Steve smiles at that, "He was often torn between morality and the mission. If it wasn't for him I wouldn't be here right now. I probably wouldn't even be alive. He was the only thing I had." You bite your lip and avoid Steve's gaze, silently blaming your nightmare; if you hadn't of been so shaken you never would've shared that information.

"Were you two…" He trails off and you look up at him surprised.

"What? No! No. It wasn't like that," You shake your head firmly, "I don't think in a situation like the one we were in you could even think like that. You have to understand, when he walked into a room I never knew who it was going to be." You look away, "You should get back to bed."

"Yeah," Steve nods, "Right. Good night (Y/n)."

You hit the button on the remote repeatedly, catching seconds of one infomercial before the next appeared before your eyes. God TV was awful at night. You let your eyes drift over to the clock on the wall and let out a sigh. 4:09. You might as well just stay up at this point. Maybe join Steve on his run. The T.V. flips to some cartoon and you heave the remote onto the sofa, grabbing the bottle of whiskey next to you instead.

You chug half the bottle in one go, relishing the heat that burns in the pit of your stomach. You watch the colors move across the screen without really seeing the animation as you sip from the bottle. You turn at the sound of footsteps, looking over the back of your chair. Stark walks in, blinking in surprise as he sees you.

"Oh, it's you," He pushes the remote out of the way and falls onto the sofa, holding a glass of amber liquid up so it doesn't spill. He glances at the bottle of liquor in your own hand and raises his eyebrows, "Thought you super soldiers couldn't get drunk. Fast metabolisms or something."

"Nothing's impossible," You tell him sagely, "If your metabolism is four times as fast, you just have to drink four times as much."

"Modern problems require modern solutions," Stark stares at the T.V., lapsing into silence. You watch the colored light flicker on his face instead of at the screen. "You know, I've almost died twice now," He says conversationally, taking a sip of his drink. "I don't mean close calls, I mean kiss your ass and say goodbye almost died." You stare at his face in the flickering light of the television, his eyes don't leave the screen. "You ever experienced anything like that?"

You lick your lips, "Couple times."

"Yeah? What happened?"

You hesitate a moment and then gently set the bottle down on the table next to you. You pull the collar of your t-shirt down, exposing a round scar on your chest, "Less than an inch from my heart. Still almost didn't make it." The Soldier had fished the bullet out himself.

You pull up the bottom of your shirt now, showing him a nasty slash across your stomach. "This guy pretty much gutted me in the middle of nowhere in Ukraine. I laid in the snow for hours just waiting. Wondering if blood loss or hypothermia would take me first." The Soldier had found you on the brink of death, applying pressure on the wound until an extraction team had come.

You let your shirt fall into place, biting your lip. "But the worst was the serum. I watched the first seven people before me die from the injection," You stare straight forward as you speak, unable to stop once you had started, "Just sitting there. Counting them down as I waited for my turn. I knew I was going to die. There wasn't even a glimmer of hope, I knew I wouldn't survive. I didn't want to. But I did."

A commercial comes on, unexpectedly loud and you both jolt slightly.

"How do you deal with it?" You realize finally why he had asked. He was looking for guidance. Or reassurance that his fear didn't make him weak.

You meet his gaze and give him a small smile, "Stark, I'm sitting here at four in the morning watching Bob and Squarepants, most of the way through a bottle of liquor. Maybe I'm not the best person to ask."

"It's _Spongebob Squarepants_," Stark huffs, before giving you a reluctant smile, "Alright. Maybe you're not so bad. Maybe."

"Honestly? Coming from you-nicest thing anyone has ever said to me."

"Funny. Cap says you're sticking around here for awhile. Going to help us hunt down this scepter?"

"That's the plan."

"And you have no ulterior motive?"

You arch a brow, "Besides the free room and board? A chance to meet an actual demi-god? Or maybe this fine whiskey I stole from your liquor cabinet?"

"Thought that bottle looked familiar," Stark rises to his feet and heads towards the door, plucking the bottle out of your hand as he goes by, "No point in wasting it if you can't even get drunk."

"Stark!" You call after him, exasperated.

"Goodnight!" He calls over his shoulder without stopping. You sit there for a moment, dumbfounded, before a smile creeps over your lips.


	11. Chapter 11

"Report to your stations immediately. This is not a drill. We are under attack. We are under attack." You wince as the sirens go off, bleating incessantly. Overhead Stark soars over you before crashing into some kind of invisible barrier.

Stark yells an expletive you barely register, and suddenly Steve's voice calls "Language!" over the comms, causing you to snort. "JARVIS, what's the view from upstairs?"

"The central building is protected by some kind of energy shield. Strucker's technology is well beyond any other HYDRA bases we've taken," the AI responds politely in your ear.

"Loki's scepter must be here," Thor-the actual Norse God of Thunder says-maybe someday you'll actually get used to that-from beside you, "Strucker couldn't have mounted this defence without it. At long last."

"I heard about the attack on New York," You tell him, "I was uh...frozen at the time. But Steve said this scepter-and your brother were behind the whole thing?"

"Adopted brother," Thor says promptly, and you chuckle before you're forced into action as your enemies launch their attack. As Thor soars into the sky you start taking down anything that moves from your vantage point.

"At long last is lasting a little long here boys," Natasha deadpans over the comm.

"Yeah, I think we lost the element of surprise," Clint adds over the twang of his bow.

"Wait a second. No one else is going to deal with the fact that Cap just said "language?" Stark asks, sounding positively elated. Steve tosses his shield over your head as you pause to reload and lets out a groan.

"I know," A truck starts down the path and he grabs his bike before throwing it at the vehicle, "It just slipped out."

"Oh Steve," You tell him, "The world doesn't deserve you."

"Clint's hit," Natasha calls over the radio and Steve sends you a worried glance before something whips by sending you backwards. Steve hits the ground next to you a fraction of a second later, bemused.

"What the hell was that?" You exclaim while Steve radios to the group: "We have an enhanced in the field-Stark we really need to get inside."

Thor crashes to the ground next to you, hammer clenched in his hand and not a scratch on him. "The enhanced?"

"He's a blur," Steve says, "All the new players we've faced-I've never seen this. In fact, I still haven't"

"Whoever he is he wasn't around when I was," You tell them, "Pretty sure I would remember whatever that is."

"Clint's hit pretty bad guys," Natasha interrupts over the comm, "We're gonna need evac."

"I can get Barton to the jet. The sooner we're gone the better. You and Stark can secure the scepter," Thor offers.

"Hold up, we've got incoming," You brush your hair out of your face, "You guys wanna take care of those tanks?"

"Looks like they're lining up," Thor says, voice full of humor.

"Well, they're excited," Steve responds, a ghost of a smile on his own lips. You duck down as Thor hits Steve's shield with Mjolnir, and the resulting force takes down the soldiers.

"Find the scepter," Thor repeats as he spins his hammer before flying off.

"And for gosh sake, watch your language!" Stark adds, and you can't help but grin.

"I think you're stuck with that one Cap," You tell him, nudging his shoulder with yours.

"I'm in," Stark announces and you frown, looking at Steve.

"Don't go in by yourself-" You start but he cuts in, "-Too late." You can hear gunfire through the comm, "Guys, stop, we gotta talk about this-"

By the time you catch up to Stark he's stepping out of his suit and over to the computers. "Okay JARVIS, you know I want it all. Make sure you copy in Hill at HQ."

"We're locked down out here," Natasha says into your ear.

"Then get to Banner. Time for a lullaby," Steve tells her before turning his attention to you, "I'm going to find Strucker. Stay with Tony?"

"Be careful," You tell him, before turning your eyes back to Stark.

"I know you're hiding more than files…" He mutters to himself, "Hey, J, give me an IR scan of the room real quick."

"The wall to your left, I'm reading steel reinforcement and an air current."

"Secret door?" Stark murmurs, "Please be a secret door…"

"It's definitely a secret door," You say before kicking the wall sending the hidden door off its hinges. Stark frowns at you. "What?"

"You have no finesse. It's really unbecoming for a lady."

"Eat me Stark," You call over your shoulder as you step through the hole, "What the-"

"-We have a second enhanced. Female. Do not engage," Steve interrupts, "Guys, I got Strucker."

"Yeah...We've got something...bigger."

"Holy fuck. Is this all from New York?" You look around the room in awe. You approach the scepter and pick it up, weighing it in your hand for a moment before you turn back to Stark. Your eyes narrow in confusion as you take in his dazed expression. "Tony?" You approach him; "You okay?" He jolts as you grab his arm before his eyes come back into focus, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah. Fine," He says too quickly, "Let's get out of here."

You glance up at Natasha and Bruce talking quietly, he was frowning and you knew he was worried about what he had done when he was the Hulk.

"Thor, report on the Hulk?" Natasha calls, and you look over at the large demi-god.

"The gates of Hell are filled with the screams of his victims," Thor exclaims jovially and you choke on your spit. Something in Natasha's glare sends him backtracking; "Uh, but not the screams of the dead of course, no no, uh...wounded screams, mainly whimpering, a great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids, and...uh...gout." Bruce groans before Tony interrupts.

"It feels good, yeah?" Tony says, looking at the scepter in Thor's lap. "I mean you've been after this thing since SHIELD collapsed. Not that I haven't enjoyed our little raiding parties, but…"

"No, but this...brings it to a close."

"As soon as we find out what else this thing has been used for. I don't just mean weapons. Since when is Strucker capable of human enhancement?" Steve asks.

"You think he used the scepter to give those enhanced their powers?" You ask Steve, and he gives you a 'could be anything' shrug.

"Banner and I'll give it a once over before it goes back to Asgard. Is that cool with you?" Thor nods and Tony leans back in his seat, "I mean, just a few days until the farewell party. You're staying right?"

"Yes, yes, of course. A victory should be honored with revels."

"Yeah. Who doesn't love revels. Captain?"

"Hopefully this puts an end to the Chitauri and HYDRA, so, yes, revels." Steve can't help but smile at the victory.

"You sticking around?" Steve asks as you start to land.

"For a couple days at least, unless something comes up." You drop your voice to just above a whisper, "I've got a couple leads I want to follow up soon though."

"Anything solid?" He responds in the same tone.

"Not yet. If it looks to be anything more solid than vapers I'll let you know."


	12. Chapter 12

You dab a bit of lip gloss onto your lips before you check your reflection. Satisfied you smack your lips together once before turning away. You slip on your new ballgown, courtesy of Stark. You don't recognize the name on the tag but the fabric gives away it's designer origins. You lift the fabric so it doesn't drag on the ground and shuffle over to the bed where your holster, gun, and shoes sit. You strap the holster around your calf; not an ideal location but the only place on the dress loose enough that you could keep a gun without it being obvious. Not that you needed a gun, you reminded yourself, but habits are habits. You slip on the shoes and then rise to your feet. You take a few small hops to ensure everything is secure and then you head to the door.

You take a deep breath as you take the elevator down, and remind yourself that you are a highly trained assassin with superhuman abilities and you shouldn't be nervous about a _party_. You had been to enough; whereas you and the Soldier typically killed from the shadows HYDRA would sometimes put you on solo infiltration missions. You knew the ins and outs of the social interactions of every type of party. You could locate your target and get him away from a crowd with a handful of soft spoken words and gentle touches. But this was different. You _probably_ weren't going to kill anyone tonight, and to your surprise you actually kind of _liked_ these people.

The elevator dings, signaling your arrival and the door slides open. Your confidence immediately evaporates and you make a beeline for the bar, ignoring the faces of all the well dressed people milling around the open space. "Bourbon, neat. Make it a double." You tell the bartender, your eyes wandering around the room.

"Well well well," Stark leans on the bar next to you, "You do wear clothing not made of Kevlar."

"On occasion," You tell him with a small smile, "Thanks for the dress Stark." The bartender slides your drink over with one for Stark as well which he takes and holds up to you.

"To...new beginnings," He says, gently clinking his glass against yours, "I gotta mingle kid, but enjoy yourself. Have some hors d'oeuvres and drink to your heart's content."

"You're a hell of a host," You raise your empty glass solemnly before gesturing to the bartender to refill it.

"Sounds like a hell of a fight," Your ears perk up at the sound of Sam's voice and you turn on your stool to see him and Steve walking towards you, both looking handsome in their formal wear. Sam lets out a whistle as he sees you, "Wait, wait. Don't move. I need to commit this to memory."

"And I'm sure I don't want to know what you're going to use that memory for," You grimace, "So how did it go? Find anything?"

"Just you breaking my heart," Sam mocks, "But no. Everything's cold. Feels like we're searching for a damn ghost. Steve said you're planning on leaving tomorrow."

"That's the plan as long as no world ending disasters come our way," You joke, "I'll be back before you even start to miss me, bird-boy."

"That's it," Sam says suddenly, "I was going to spend the whole night wooing you, but now? You see that blonde over there?" He points and you nod with a smile, "I'm asking _her _to dance."

You smile at Steve as Sam saunters in that direction, "Poor girl, she has no idea what she's in for. Speaking of which, I spy a lovely brunette looking in your direction Captain."

"Not you too," Steve groans.

"Hey," You hold up your hands defensively, "I said nothing about dating, but there's nothing wrong with a quick fu-"

"(Y/n)!" Thor claps his hand on your shoulder interrupting you, "Captain Rogers. It feels good to close this chapter, does it not?"

"I'm just glad my intel panned out," You tell him, "Are you excited to return to Asgard?"

"Ah, it is bittersweet," Thor replies, "I do miss my home, however I will also miss my friends here. Will you share a drink with me?" As he speaks, he pulls out a flask of amber liquid and pours a generous helping into two glasses from the bar. "To our shared victories, may our tales be remembered for years to come!" You take a healthy sip and almost choke.

"What the hell is that?" You sputter, nodding towards the flask and Thor laughs.

"Liquor!" Thor exclaims jubilantly, "Aged for a thousand years in the barrels built from the wreck of Brunhilde's fleet. It's not meant for mortal men, but you two are no mortal men."

"Right," You raise your eyebrows at Steve and you both take another sip, "Thanks Thor." As the large man approaches an uncomfortable looking Banner, you turn to Steve.

"You do look nice by the way," Steve tells you, "Very elegant."

"Thanks, Stark sent the dress," You look him over, "I do think I prefer you out of the stars and stripes."

"You don't say," Steve raises an eyebrow and gives you a small smile, "And here I thought they were the height of fashion."

"Well you were frozen for a long time, so I suppose your fashion faux pas are understandable," You finish your drink, "I think Sam's trying to get your attention. Looks like the blonde is friends with the aforementioned brunette."

Steve casts a look over his shoulder and lets out a groan, "Save me? Dance with me."

"Sorry Captain," You slide your empty glass to the bartender to fill, "I'm gonna go find that Norse God to top this off. Go on, have some fun." You slide off the bar stool and playfully shove him towards Sam.

"You sure you want to do this?" You ask Clint doubtfully as he anchors his elbow onto the bar and holds his hand out to you, biceps flexing.

"Psh, come on. You're tiny. How strong can you really be? Even if you are _enhanced_." He says this last part sarcastically and you smile in response.

"Okay," You down the rest of your drink and take his hand. You feel him start to push against your hand and you adjust your output proportionally, just keeping him from moving your arm backwards. His eyes flicker up to yours and a small frown appears on his lips as he increases the pressure. You let him gain a little ground and the moment his eyes alight with triumph you slam his hand down onto the bar.

"Shit!" Clint laughs, "I thought I had you for a second."

"I know," You give him a rueful smile. The bartender had left for the night and Natasha stood behind the bar. As Bruce approaches the bar you subtly signal to Clint to buzz off. You reach over the bar, grab a bottle of tequila, give Natasha a wink and head over to an abandoned tray of appetizers. You lean against a pillar and pop some kind of fancy quiche into your mouth. You're pleasantly surprised to feel the buzz of alcohol in your veins and it felt _good_. You couldn't remember the last time you felt this carefree and relaxed. You'd have to see if you could get Thor to bring back some of the Asgardian liquor next time he came down to Earth.

You see Steve say something to Bruce and then he wanders over to you, popping one of the quiches from the tray you held into his mouth.

"I'm not sure Bruce knows what he's in for," You nod toward Romanoff across the room.

"She's something alright," Steve responds with a chuckle.

"Where'd Sam get off to?"

"Things went well with the blonde," Steve says pointedly.

"Poor girl," You shake your head, "Now there's someone who doesn't know what they're in for. And the brunette?"

"Lindsey. She wasn't my type."

"Poor Lindsey.

"I let her down easy."

"I'm sure you did," You sigh, "I suppose it's honorable though. You have the potential to be a lady killer but you choose the path of celibacy."

"Oh is that how it is?" Steve laughs, "I don't see anyone on your arm this evening."

"Oof. Yeah, thanks for bringing that up. It was a swing and a miss with that Norse God over there," You take a swig from your bottle, "He seems pretty hung up on that girlfriend of his. Too bad."

Steve stares at you for a moment and then he smiles, "You're joking. It's hard to tell sometimes."

"I am," You confirm with a smile of your own.

"But it's a trick!" Clint exclaims suddenly, grabbing your attention. You nod towards where the Avengers had gathered on the other side of the room and you and Steve head in that direction. In the center of the table sits Mjlonir, which you see Clint is gesturing to as you approach.

"Oh no," Thor laughs, "It's much more than that."

"Uh 'whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power!" Clint quotes sarcastically, "Whatever man! It's a trick."

"Well please, be my guest," Thor waves his hand towards the handle of the hammer.

"Come on," Stark grins.

Clint pauses, "Really?"

"Yeah!" Thor says, and Clint gets to his feet.

"Oh, this is gonna be beautiful." Rhodie says, leaning forward to watch. You exchange a smile with Steve and shake your head.

"Clint, you've had a tough week. We won't hold it against you if you can't get it up," Stark says, and you snort.

"You know I've seen this before, right?" Clint grabs the handle and strains to lift it. After a few seconds he looks at Thor, releasing his grip. "I still don't know how you do it."

"Smell the silent judgement?" Stark asks and Clint smiles.

"Please, Stark, by all means." You hide your smile behind your hand as Stark gets to his feet.

"Oh, here we go," Natasha grins.

"Never one to shrink from an honest challenge." Stark says. "It's physics."

"Physics!" Banner laughs as Stark grabs the hammer.

"Right. So if I lift it, then I rule Asgard right?"

"Yes, of course," Thor says casually.

"I will be reinstating Prima Nocta," You let out a laugh as he strains to lift it to no avail. "Okay. I'll be right back."

"Men," Natasha mouths to you with a shake of her head before Stark returns, wearing the hand from one of his suits. Stark tries again and fails before both him and Rhodie give it a try, bickering the entire time.

Steve leans over to you while Banner pretends to turn into the Hulk while lifting the hammer, "You could stay you know."

"Huh?" You turn to look at him surprised at his quiet words.

"Everyone really likes having you around. Maybe you could stay for awhile. Be part of the team." Your mouth works soundlessly for a moment as his blue eyes watch you intently.

"Let's go Steve," Tony says, saving you from a response, "No pressure."

Giving you an exasperated look Steve grabs the hammer, and you watch surprised as it shifts slightly, but he's still unable to lift it. Thor lets out a booming laugh.

"Nothing."

"And?" Stark asks, looking around.

"Widow?" Banner asks and Natasha laughs.

"Oh, no no. That is not a question that I need answered."

"(Y/n)?" Thor gives you a smile.

"Not a chance," You reply.

"All deference to the man who wouldn't be king, but it's rigged," Stark announces.

"You bet your ass!" Clint exclaims in agreement.

"Steve, he said a bad language word!" Maria says, and you almost spit out your drink.

Steve glares at Stark, "Did you tell everyone about that?"

Ignoring him, Stark goes on, "The handle's imprinted right? Like a security code. 'Whosoever is carrying Thor's fingerprints' is, I think, the literal translation?"

"Yes, well that's uh, a very interesting theory," Thor says, rising to his feet, "I have a simpler one." He reaches out and grabs the hammer before flipping it easily in the air, "You're all not worthy." A chorus of groans goes up from the group and you laugh at Thor's obvious jubilation.

You feel the sensation of your skin crawling before you even register the loud screech that fills the room and you feel your buzz dissipate the moment the falling apart robot appears in the room, it's cold voice washing over you. "Worthy...No...How could you be worthy? You're all killers."

"Stark." Steve says, his eyes trained on the robot. It's not until he speaks that you realize you're both already on your feet.

"JARVIS." Tony calls.

"I'm sorry. I was asleep. Or...I was a dream?" The robot continues.

"Tony?" You slowly kneel down and slide your hand up your leg until you reach your gun under the layers of silk.

"Reboot, Legionnaire OS," Tony says, tapping at his tablet, "We got a buggy suit."

"There was a terrible noise...and I was tangled...in...in...strings. I had to kill the other guy. He was a good guy."

"You killed someone?" Steve asks, and your fingers unsnap the holster almost without thought.

"Wouldn't have been my first call," The robot responds, "But, down in the real world we're faced with the ugly choices."

"Who sent you?" Thor demands, hammer clenched in his hand.

"I see a suit of armor around the world," You glance at Tony, as his voice is played from the robot.

"Ultron!" Banner exclaims and your eyes shift to him, confused.

"In the flesh. Or no, not yet. Not this...chrysalis. But I'm ready. I'm on a mission."

"What mission?" Natasha asks, and you wrap your fingers around the grip.

"Peace in our time." The wall goes flying out, and Tony's Iron Legion bots come flying through. You snap to your feet, gun in hand and open fire as the chaos erupts around you. You hear Natasha shouting to Bruce not to turn green after he flies past you and you glance behind you to make sure the Hulk wasn't on your ass.

"Steve, he's got the scept-" You're cut off as one of the Legion fires at you and you're forced to dive behind a sofa.

"Stark!" Steve shouts, while Stark tries to shut down one of the Iron Legion who keeps repeating "We're here to help." Irony.

"Cap!" Clint throws Steve his shield, and he uses it to destroy the last of the Legion while you climb to your feet, your dress ripped up the side and your hair falling around your face.

"That was dramatic! I'm sorry. I know you mean well. You just didn't think it through. You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to evolve?" Ultron picks up one of the pieces of an Iron Legion bot. "With these? These puppets? There's only one path to peace. The Avenger's extinction." Thors hammer flies past you, hitting Ultron. As he crumples, a phantom voice sings out, "I had strings, but now I'm free. There are no strings on me, no strings on me."


	13. Chapter 13

"I'm sorry, what the hell was that?" You demand as you stand in the lab, "Stark what did you _do_?"

"All our work is gone. Ultron cleared out, used the internet as an escape hatch." Banner sighs, running his hand through his hair.

"Ultron." Steve repeats, jaw clenched.

"He's been in everything. Files, surveillance. Probably knows more about us than we know about each other," Natasha says leaning over a terminal.

"He's in your files, he's in the internet. What if he decides to access something a little more exciting?" You turn to look at Rhodie, eyes wide.

"Nuclear codes." Hill says slowly.

"Nuclear codes. Look, we need to make some calls. Assuming we still can." Rhodie says firmly.

"Nukes? He said he wanted _us_ dead," Natasha refutes.

"He didn't say dead. He said extinct." Steve shakes his head.

"He also said he killed somebody," Clint crosses his arms and you frown.

"But there wasn't anyone else in the building," Hill protests.

"Yes there was." Your head cocks as Tony brings up the destroyed 3D image of JARVIS' consciousness.

"JARVIS," You state blankly, while Banner cuts in, "This is insane."

"JARVIS was the first line of defense. He would've shut Ultron down, it makes sense." Steve says.

"No, Ultron could've assimilated Jarvis. This isn't strategy. This is...rage." Banner frowns. Suddenly Thor grabs Tony by his throat, lifting him off the ground.

"Woah, woah, woah!" Clint exclaims, "It's going around!"

"Hey!" You lock your fingers tightly around Thor's wrist, increasing the pressure and downward force until he lets go, letting Stark fall back to the ground.

"Come on. Use your words, buddy," Stark says, rubbing at his throat while you stay close in case Thor decides to try and kill him again.

"I have more than enough words to describe you, Stark," Thor snarls.

"Thor! The Legionnaire?" Steve says, drawing the god's attention back to the issue at hand.

"Trail went cold about a hundred miles out, but it's headed north. And it has the scepter. Now we have to retrieve it, again."

"The genie's out of that bottle. Clear and present threat is Ultron." Natasha says.

"I don't understand," Dr. Cho says slowly, "You built this program. Why is it trying to kill us?" You grimace as Tony starts to laugh.

"You think this is funny?" Thor roars, and you shift slightly so you're standing between him and Tony.

"No. It's probably not, right? Is this very terrible? It is so...is it so...it is. It's so terrible."

"Tony…" You frown, "What-"

"This could've been avoided if you hadn't played with something you don't understand."

"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It is funny," Tony's all attitude now, "It's a hoot that you don't get why we need this."

"Tony, maybe this might not be the time to…" Bruce tries, but Tony cuts him off.

"Really?! That's it?! You just roll over, show your belly, every time somebody snarls?"

"Stark!" You snap, and he looks at you guiltily.

"Only when I've created a murder bot." Bruce sighs.

"We didn't!" Tony exclaims, "We weren't even close. Were we close to an interface?"

Steve doesn't give Bruce time to answer, "Well you did something right. And you did it right here. The Avengers were supposed to be different than SHIELD."

"Anybody remember when I carried a nuke through a wormhole?" Tony asks.

"No, it's never come up," Rhodie says with a roll of his eyes.

"Saved New York?"

"Never heard that."

"Recall that? A hostile alien army came charging through a hole in space. We're standing three hundred feet below it. We're the Avengers. We can bust arms dealers all the livelong day, but that? Up there? That's the end game. How were you guys planning on beating that?"

"Together," Steve says firmly.

"We'll lose," Tony counters.

"Then we'll do that together too," Stark stares at Steve for a long moment before turning away. "But Thor's right. Ultron's calling us out. And I'd like to find him before he's ready for us. The world's a big place. Let's start making it smaller."


	14. Chapter 14

"Ooh, I'm sure that's going to be okay," Ultron says as the now armless man stumbles away from him, blood spurting from the injury, "I'm sorry. It's just I don't understand. Don't compare me with Stark!" You watch impassively as he kicks the man down the steps, "It's a thing with me. Stark is, he's a sickness!" You step up with Steve and Thor as Tony lands in his Iron Man suit.

"Ahh, Junior," He says, "You're gonna break your old man's heart."

"If I have to," Ultron responds simply.

"We don't have to break anything!" Thor exclaims.

"Clearly you've never made an omelet."

"He beat me by one second!" Stark exclaims, and you roll your eyes.

"Ah, this is funny, Mr. Stark. It's what, comfortable? Like old times?" A young platinum blonde man asks, a short red haired woman by his side.

"This was never my life," Stark responds, and you can hear a touch of defensiveness in his voice.

"You two can still walk away from this," Steve says gently to the newcomers, and the red haired woman smiles.

"Oh, we will."

"I know you've suffered…" Steve tries again, but Ultron cuts him off.

"Ugh! Captain America. God's righteous man, pretending you could live without a war. I can't physically throw up in my mouth, but…"

"Then shut it," You snap. Ultron turns his head in your direction.

"And you, you're the worst of all of them. You play nice with the heroes but deep down you know you're a monster. And you willingly became a monster just because it was easier than fighting," Ice floods your veins at his words, each one stabbing at you, "You have no concept of what peace entails; you are chaos, pure and simple." Your lips curl into a politely disinterested smile while a bead of cold sweat cuts down your spine.

"If you believe in peace, then let us keep it." Thor cuts in, crossing his massive arms against his chest.

"I think you're confusing peace with quiet." Ulton counters.

"Yeah, uh-huh, what's the Vibranium for?" Stark demands.

"I'm glad that you asked that, because I wanted to take this time to explain my evil plan!"

At his words the Iron Legion appear, opening fire on you. You jump into action on instinct, throwing yourself onto the back of the one firing at Steve. You wrap your legs around it to hang on; it attempts to reach around and grab you off as it flies into the air. You grab it's head between your hands and twist as hard as you can, snapping the metal head from it's shoulders. You kick away from the robot as it plummets, managing to catch the edge of the metal walkway and lob yourself back into the action.

While your body goes to work, your mind is spiraling. While Ultron was obviously a psychopath that needed to be taken out, he wasn't wrong about you. What were you playing at by hanging out with the Avengers? Pretending you were one of them. Pretending you _could_ be one of them.

As you grab a metal leg and pull one of the Legion out of the air Steve's words echo in your mind. _Maybe you could stay for awhile. Be a part of the team._ You feel embarrassed to have even briefly considered the idea. He was wrong to have let you into his life.

You feel a gust of wind and then something hits you in the mouth, splitting your lip. A microsecond later there's an unseen kick to the gut. You stagger backwards and catch a brief glimpse of the blonde man from earlier before he's gone. "Steve," You gasp into the comm, "Someone needs to take out the Tasmanian Devil."

"On it!" He responds leaping up to your level. All you can hear is gunfire from down below, Klaue's men must have joined the fray down below.

"Steve, there!" A flash of white movies past you, and Steve knocks him down.

"Stay down kid!" He commands, and the two of you hop down into the action down below.

"Guys, is this a Code Green?" Bruce's voice crackles over the comm, but before you can respond one of the Iron Legion fires and hits a wall, sending rubble cascading down upon you.

A few feet away from you you see the red haired woman come up behind Thor, pressing her fingertips to his head before flitting away.

"Thor! Status?" Steve demands, coming to the two of you.

"The girl tried to warp my mind. Take special care. I doubt a human could keep her at bay. Fortunately I am mighty." Suddenly Thor's eyes go out of focus, and you feel a gentle caress against your temple.

The room around you dissolves and your eyes widen as you take in your new surroundings. There was no doubt in your mind as to where you were as you sagged against the unadorned white wall, the concrete cold against your back even through the layer of kevlar you wore. Your head was swimming and you fought against the confused fog. Images of a party flit through your mind, a woman mouths the word 'men' to you with a shake of her head, arm wrestling a muscled man and savoring the feeling of slamming his hand against the tabletop, laughing with a handsome blonde man-Steve-your head snaps back with the force of the thought. This wasn't real. You were free-fighting with the Avengers-you blink, that can't be right, can it?

Your fingers trail against the cold wall behind you. It feels solid. Real. You try to conjure up more memories of the party but nothing surfaces. The door across from you, almost invisible to the naked eye opens and he strides in, face blank as he shuts the door behind him.

"Soldier," Your chest tightens, "I don't-" A tall man, hammer clenched in his fist, "I don't understand what's going on," An older man with a goatee sits on a sofa across from you while cartoons drift across the screen of a television. Your head pounds harder with each memory.

"What's going on?" The Soldier asks blankly, taking another step towards you. You want to reach out and touch him, see if he feels as real as he looks but you can't tear your fingers from the wall.

"I-" You cut yourself off as you notice what you should have noticed immediately. The coldness in the eyes that are now fixed on yours. The stiffness of the posture. This was not your Soldier. Not right now.

"What's going on," He repeats, as a flash of a handsome dark haired man shoots through your mind with another wave of pain. Your hand finally leaves the wall, and it's halfway up to grab your head when your vision blurs and you stagger forward. You don't have time to react when the Soldier crosses the room in two large strides, but instead of catching you he grabs you by your throat, lifting you and crushing you against the wall. "What's going on is you left me here," His fingers tighten, "Left me here to get wiped again-left me here to rot," The Soldier barks in your face, jaw clenched, you pry at the solid unrelenting metal of his fingers, trying to draw a breath as spots dance in front of your eyes. "You had a choice! Everything you did was of your own free will and yet you're the one who got their freedom? And they call me a monster. You don't deserve freedom. You don't deserve to live." He drops you and you hit the floor, your knees crying out in protest. You drag a handful of rapid breaths down your burning throat before he speaks again, "But you're back now, and you won't get away again." He opens the door and you see the armed guard just outside, "Prep her for the machine," He says without turning around, "We want her wiped and on ice within the hour."

"No," The cry rips itself from your throat but all that comes out is a pathetic rasp as the guard approaches you, "Please. I'll do whatever you want," You tell him in a desperate whisper, "You don't need to wipe me. I'll do whatever you want. I'll kill whoever you want."

"You will," The guard responds, his German accent thick in your ears, "After you're wiped and reprogrammed you will do exactly what we want."


	15. Chapter 15

Pressure on your shoulder. It's the first thing you're aware of and the first thing you respond to; you tear your eyes open and launch yourself to the side before scrambling to your feet, you knees slightly bent and your hands curled into fists as you assess the situation. Four tired drawn faces stare back at you; Natasha, Bruce and Thor sprawled out across the seats of the quinjet while Steve half kneels at the seats where you had been a half second ago, hand still reached forward from where he must have gripped your shoulder to wake you. To _wake_ you. Because what you had seen hadn't been real. But it could be.

"Sorry," Your voice comes out a broken whisper and you relax your stance, falling into the nearest seat. "What happened?"

"The girl...She did something to our heads, some kind of illusion," Steve says quietly. Your eyes drop to your shaking hands and you shove them between your thighs before you nod.

"Makes sense," You mumble. You pause, trying to put some strength back into your voice. "Is everyone…"

"Okay," Steve nods, "Shaken."

You nibble at your lip as the jet descends and you all climb out; you're parked on the lawn of a large farmhouse. You look around at the unfamiliar landscape confused.

"What is this place?" Thor asks as you walk towards the house.

"A safe house?" Tony offers, glancing at Barton.

"Let's hope," He pushes the door open, "Honey, I'm home." You blink as a heavily pregnant woman walks in from another room and up to Barton. "Hi. Company. Sorry I didn't call ahead."

"Hey," She presses a kiss to his lips. You didn't know that Barton was in a relationship, and as you glance at the faces around you, they didn't either.

"This is an agent of some kind," Stark whispers loudly to Thor.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is Laura," Barton smiles, and Laura adds, "I know all your names."

"Ooh! Incoming!" Barton calls out as two kids run in and he scoops up the little girl. Now stark looks dumbfounded.

"These are...smaller agents…"

"Did you bring Auntie Nat?" The little girl asks, and Natasha steps forward with a smile.

"Why don't you hug her and find out?" You watch with a small smile of your own as Natasha scoops her up into her arms.

"Sorry for barging in on you," Steve says politely to Laura.

"Yeah we would have called ahead but we were too busy having no idea that you existed," You nudge Tony's ribs with your elbow, maybe a little too hard as he lets out a little pained gasp and shoots you a dirty look.

"Yeah, well Fury helped me set this up when I joined. He kept it off SHIELD's files," Barton explains, "I'd like to keep it that way. I figure it's a good place to lay low." As Natasha starts to talk to Laura, you see Thor walk out of the house. You exchange a look with Steve and both slip out after him.

"Hey, you alright?" You ask, laying your hand on his thick forearm, "I don't know what you saw but I'm still a little shaken myself."

"I saw...something in that dream. I need answers. I won't find them here."

"Thor-wait!" You are forced back as he uses his hammer to fly away, "Damn it. We're not even at the boss fight yet and we're already one down."

"Yeah," Steve sighs, sitting down on the porch steps. You sit next to him pulling your knees up to your chest. "This is bad (Y/n). We've faced impossible odds before but...we're responsible for this one. And with the Hulk and Stark practically destroying that city…"

"I know." You look away, eyes trailing over the lush landscape.

"What did you see? When the girl did her mind tricks on you?" Steve asks after a moment and you sigh.

"I was back at the HYDRA base where they kept us. They were going to wipe my memories." You play with a loose thread on your suit. You'd have to patch it soon. "I know I said it was a waste of time looking for him, but I honestly thought I would be able to find him. We worked together so often, I thought I knew him like I knew myself. I've been thinking…"

"What?"

"Every trail I get is completely cold. Maybe he's back on ice… Or maybe he's not with HYDRA anymore," At Steve's heavy gaze you continue, "What he did back there on the helicarrier, pulling us out like that? He broke through the conditioning and disobeyed. Maybe he didn't go back."

Steve looks stunned at your words, but before he can respond Stark walks out the door. "Help me chop some wood Cap."

You're sitting alone on the porch with a cup of tea when Laura slips quietly out the door. "The team is meeting in the kitchen. Nick Fury is here."

"Seriously?" You groan. You weren't a huge fan of the ex-head of SHIELD or the head of any government like organization really, "Thanks for letting me know."

"Ultron took you folks out of play to buy himself time. My contacts all say he's building something. The amount of Vibranium he made off with...I don't think it's just one thing." Fury is saying as you walk in. You lean against the wall, your steady gaze on the one-eyed man.

"What about Ultron himself?" Steve asks.

"Ah, he's easy to track. He's everywhere. Guy's multiplying faster than a Catholic rabbit. Still doesn't help us get an angle on any of his plans though."

"He still going after launch codes?" Tony enquiries, and Fury nods.

"Yes, he is. But he's not making any headway."

"I cracked the Pentagon's firewall in high school on a dare," Tony scoffs.

"Yeah, well, I contacted our friends at the NEXUS about that."

"NEXUS?" Steve asks.

"It's the world internet hub in Oslo. Every byte of data flows through there, fastest access on Earth," Bruce explains.

"So what'd they say?" Clint asks.

"He's fixated on the missiles, but the codes are constantly being changed."

"By who? Tony asks, confused.

"Parties unknown." You roll your eyes at that.

"Do we have an ally?" Natasha asks, and Fury turns his gaze to her.

"Ultron's got an enemy, that's not the same thing. Still I'd pay folding money to know who it is."

"I might need to visit Oslo. Find out unknown," Stark says, rising to his feet.

"Well this is good times, boss, but I was kind of hoping when I saw you, you'd have more than that." Natasha says, understatement of the year. All Fury had given you was more questions.

"I do. I have you. Back in the day I had eyes everywhere, ears everywhere else. Here we all are, back on Earth, with nothing but our wit and our will to save the world. So stand. Outwit the platinum bastard."

"Steve doesn't like that kind of talk," Natasha says, and you crack a smile.

"You know what, Romanoff?"

"So what does he want?" Fury asks.

"To become better. Better than us. He keeps building bodies."

"Person bodies," Tony cuts in, "The human form is inefficient, biologically speaking, we're outdated. But he keeps coming back to it."

"You know, when you two programmed him to protect the human race, you amazingly failed." Natasha deadpans, but Banner shakes his head.

"They don't need to be protected, they need to evolve. Ultron's going to evolve."

"How?" Fury asks, and suddenly the answer was right in front of you. Hadn't she just used her new technology to grow Clint new skin?

"Has anyone been in contact with Helen Cho?"

As the rest of the team files out to gear up, Fury turns his gaze on you.

"You again?" He asks, gathering up his things, "Thought you were laying low."

"Nothing more relaxing than a psychotic AI," You respond.

"So you're one of them now? An Avenger?"

"Just helping out," You brush past him to rinse out your coffee cup.

"And searching for the Winter Soldier, if my sources are correct. You sure that's a good idea?"

"Thought you were retired, old man," You turn off the water and head towards the door, "Your regime has fallen. Move on."

"Alright, what's the plan?" You ask as you rejoin the team outside.

"The four of us are going to find Cho," Steve says.

"Strictly recon," Stark says, "I'll hit the NEXUS. I'll join you as soon as I can."

"If Ultron really is building a body…"

"He'll be more powerful than any of us. Maybe all of us. An android designed by a robot."

"You know," Steve nudges you with his elbow, "I really miss the days when the weirdest thing science ever created was us."

"I'll drop Banner off at the tower. Do you mind if I borrow Ms. Hill?" Fury cuts in.

"She's all yours apparently," Tony tells Fury dryly, "What are you gonna do?"

"I don't know. Something dramatic I hope."


	16. Chapter 16

You drum your fingers on your thigh as you wait in the Quinjet for word from Steve. You listen in to his conversation with Cho with growing horror.

"A body implanted with a gem with uncontainable power," You mutter, "Great."

"Did you guys copy that?" Steve asks over the comms.

"We did," Barton responds while Natasha looks over some specs on a tablet.

"I got a private jet taking off across town. No manifest. That could be him."

"There!" Clint says, and you turn to look at the truck leaving the lab, "It's the truck from the lab. Right above you Cap. On the loop by the bridge. It's them. I got three with the Cradle, one in the cab. I could take out the driver."

"Negative! If that truck crashes the gem could level the city. We need to draw out Ultron." Steve leaps onto the roof of the truck.

"Well he's definitely unhappy! I'm gonna try and keep him that way." You tense as you watch Steve trying to enter the truck.

"You're not a match for him, Cap."

"Thanks, Barton." Ultron hits Steve and you're on your feet, but to your relief he manages to climb back onto the truck's roof.

"We got a window," Clint says, and you climb onto the back of a bike with Natasha, "Four, three….give 'em hell guys." There's a moment of free fall, and then the bike's tires hit the ground. Natasha scoops up Steve's shield as you pass it.

"Always picking up after you boys," Natasha says.

"They're heading under the overpass, I've got no shot."

"Which way?"

"Hard right… Now." You lean into the abrupt turn with her, and she throws Steve back his shield which he uses to knock Ultron away from him.

"Watch out," You call to Natasha as you come into a pedestrian filled area.

"Out of the way! Coming through! Sorry, coming through!-Clint, can you draw out the guards?"

"Let's find out." The sentries leave the truck and go after Barton, leaving your way to the truck clear.

"Cap, can you keep him occupied?"

"What do you think I've been doing?" Steve asks, and you roll your eyes.

"I'm going in," Natasha tells you, "Go help Cap." You hop off the back of the bike, landing next to Steve on the train.

"Heard you were having trouble, thought I'd come get myself a piece," You tell him, facing off against Ultron.

"Wait-" Steve says, as Wanda and Pietro show up on the train.

"Please. Don't do this," Ultron tells them, and Wanda's eyes narrow.

"What choice do we have?" After a moment's hesitation Ultron flies off and you and Steve both let out a breath.

"Nat! Cap, you see Nat?" Clint's slightly panicked voice sounds in your ear.

"If you have the package, get it to Stark! Go!"

"Do you have eyes on Nat?" Barton repeats. Steve looks at you and you shake your head.

"Go!" You watch as the Quinjet takes off.

"Civilians in our path." Steve warns, and you watch somewhat dumbfounded as Pietro speeds away, moving civilians out of the way of the train as Wanda uses her powers to slow and then stop the train.

"I'm fine. I just need a minute," Pietro pants in response to his sister's concern. You level your gun at the red haired woman, your finger itching to pull the trigger.

"And I'm very tempted not to give you one," Steve frowns and meets your eyes, giving his head a small shake before turning back to the newcomers. Your lip twitches slightly as you lower the gun, thumbing the safety back on.

"The Cradle, did you get it?"

"Stark will take care of it."

"No, he won't." Wanda argues.

"You don't know what you're talking about. Stark's not crazy."

"He will do anything to make things right."

You bite your lip, "Steve…"

Turning away, Steve calls out into the comm, "Stark, come in. Stark? Anyone on comms?"

"Ultron can't tell the difference between saving the world and destroying it. Where do you think he gets that?"

"We need to get back," You tell Steve. You don't believe Tony will do anything to make this worse but…

"The genetic coding tower's at ninety-seven percent. You have got to upload that schematic in the next three minutes," You hear Bruce's voice, and Steve pushes past you to get into the lab.

"I'm gonna say this once."

"How about nonce?" Tony suggests.

"Shut it down!"

"Steve-" Bruce tries.

"Nope, not gonna happen."

"You don't know what you're doing."

"And you do?" Banner asks, "She's not in your head?"

"I know you're angry," Wanda tries.

"Oh, we're way past that. I could choke the life out of you and never change a shade." Banner growls.

"Banner, after everything that's happened…" Steve says, but Tony cuts him off, "That's nothing compared to what's coming!"

"You don't know what's in there!" Wanda cries.

"This isn't a game…"

"The creature!" A sudden breeze whips across your face and suddenly pieces of the lab equipment are flying.

"No, no. Go on. You were saying?" Pietro says, coming to a stop. Barton draws his gun and fires at the floor beneath his feet, sending him downwards.

"Pietro!" His sister cries.

"What? You didn't see that coming?" Barton mocks.

"Go ahead, piss me off." Banner growls at Wanda.

"Guys-" You call out, but Thor's already on the Cradle, and he slams his hammer down, sending bolts of lightning throughout the machine. You watch with wide eyes as the body inside grabs Thor, flying backwards and throwing him before he stops suddenly.

"I'm sorry, that was...odd." He looks at Thor, "Thank you."

"Thor, you helped create this?" Steve asks dubiously.

"I've had a vision. A whirlpool that sucks in all hope of life and at its center is that," He points to the glowing gemstone in the center of the android's head.

"What, the gem?" Banner asks.

"It's the Mind Stone," Thor clarifies, "It's one of the six Infinity Stones, the greatest power in the universe, unparalleled in its destructive capabilities."

"Then why would you bring it to…" Steve starts.

"Because Stark is right."

"Oh, it's definitely the end times," Banner says.

"The Avengers cannot defeat Ultron." Thor says simply.

"Not alone," Vision states.

"Why does your Vision sound like JARVIS?" Steve asks Tony.

"We reconfigured JARVIS' matrix to create something new."

"I think I've had my fill of new," Steve states.

"You think I'm a child of Ultron?" Vision asks.

"You're not?" Steve counters.

"I'm not Ultron...I'm not JARVIS...I am...I am…"

"I looked in your head and saw annihilation," Wanda says darkly.

"Look again."

"Yeah, her seal of approval means jack to me," Clint cuts in.

"Their powers, the horrors in our heads, Ultron himself. They all came from the Mind Stone, and they're nothing compared to what it can unleash. But with it on our side…"

"Is it? Are you? On our side?"

"I don't think it's that simple," Vision says.

"Well it better get real simple real soon." Barton growls.

"I am on the side of life. Ultron isn't. He will end it all."

"What's he waiting for?" Tony demands.

"You."

"Where?" Banner asks.

"Sokovia," Clint answers, "He's got Nat there too."

"If we're wrong about you...If you're the monster that Ultron made you to be…" Bruce starts, and Vision steps forward.

"What will you do?" He looks around and all of your faces, and after a long pause continues. "I don't want to kill Ultron. He's unique, and he's in pain. But that pain will roll over the Earth, so he must be destroyed. Every form he's built, every trace of his presence on the net. We have to act now. And not one of us can do it without the others. Maybe I am a monster. I don't think I'd know if I were one. I'm not what you are, and not what you intended. So there may be no way to make you trust me. But we need to go." Your gaze falls to Thor's hammer clenched in his fist, and Thor's face splits into a grin as Vision hands it to him.

"Right," Thor says, patting Stark on the shoulder, "Well done."

"Three minutes. Get what you need." Steve says with a sigh. Tony climbs into the suit and flips up the mask to look at Steve.

"No way we all get through this. If even one tin soldier is left standing, we've lost. It's gonna be blood on the floor."

"I got no plans tomorrow night," Steve says.

"I get first crack at the big guy. Iron Man's the one he's waiting for."

"That's true," Vision says walking past, "He hates you the most."

Steve turns to look at you as the others head toward the jet, and you sigh.

"Skip the, 'I know this isn't what you signed up for' speech Steve," You tell him, "In for an inch, in for a mile."


	17. Chapter 17

"Ultron knows we're coming. Odds are we'll be riding into heavy fire, and that's what we signed up for," Steve tells you as you stand in the street, "But the people of Sokovia, they didn't. So our priority is getting them out." At his words Pietro speeds off towards the police station, Steve doesn't falter. "All they want is to live their lives in peace, and that's not going to happen today. But we can do our best to protect them. And we can get the job done and find out what Ultron's been building. We find Romanoff, and we clear the field. Keep the fight between us. Ultron thinks we're monsters, and we're what's wrong with the world. This isn't just about beating him. It's about whether or not he's right."

"Here here," You smile despite yourself at the adrenaline you can feel pumping through your veins. You couldn't get enough of it. You weren't sure if it was your enhancement or your past, but either way you never felt as good as you did when you were in action. You break from the group, eager to find either something to kill or something to save, and at this point you didn't really have a preference.

Your eyes land on a group of citizens hovering outside a cafe who turn to look at you with wide eyes as you approach, gun in hand. "Get out," You shout to them, "You need to get out of the city now!"

A man looks at you, his lips curling, "Yeah? Says who?"

"Says me," You fire a round, taking out a juice glass sitting at a nearby table. The man who had spoken looks stunned as orange juice pools at his feet and then they scatter, blindly running in every direction "Out of the city!" You call after them as a reminder. You feel wind and then you see Pietro looking at you with a half amused, half disgusted expression.

"Maybe you try not shooting at them," He offers, and then he's gone again. You stare at the spot where he had stood for another half second before you start moving again.

"He's in the church," Stark's voice says over the comm, "Headed there now."

"Coming your way now," You respond, looking at your surroundings to get your bearings. A low buzz fills the air and then you're surrounded as a dozen robots appear overhead.

"Shit, we've got incoming," You fire at the closest one, effectively drawing them to you instead of towards any citizens. "Shit," You repeat as you're forced to roll out of the way as they open fire on you. You grimace as the wall behind you explodes, sending debris raining down on you.

"They're all over," Steve responds in your ear, "We need to take them out. You alright on your end (Y/n)?" You hear a squeal of metal over the comm and you grimace. You fire two more shots, taking two down before you duck behind the nearest building. "(Y/n), status?" You aim around the corner of the building, taking down three more. "(Y/n), respond!"

"Will you chill?" You snap in a fresh clip, "I'm busy."

"Status?"

"Taking fire," You tell him. A glint of metal catches your eye and you see one flying above the alley you're currently crouched in. You take a deep breath before running up the side of the brick wall a few steps before you launch yourself backwards. You twist in the air and grab it around the neck; you fire one round into its head before landing neatly on the ground, "But other than that things are swell Cap, thanks for asking."

You bend over, resting your hands on your knees as you catch your breath after the last of the robots in your immediate area go down. "What the-" You frown at the slight vibration you feel under your feet and walk out of the alley and to the street. The vibration becomes a brutal shaking and you have to plant your feet to keep your balance. "Uhh… We got an Earthquake over here Cap. What the hell is going on?"

A loud cracking fills the air and you lose your footing, falling backwards. You wince as your tailbone cracks on the ground a few layers of skin are lost from your palms. The pavement in front of you splits and you're forced to scramble backwards as the opening grows wider. "Oh no," You breathe, watching frozen as the ground in front of you rises up past the land on the other side of the crevice.

"Cap, you got incoming," Stark's voice crackles across the comm.

"Incoming already came in," Steve sounds tense, "Stark, you worry about bringing the city back down safely. The rest of us have one job: tear these things apart." You climb to your feet, wiping the blood from your palms onto your pants. "You get hurt, hurt 'em back. You get killed, walk it off."

"Right," You say wearily, "On my way."

You tear through the city streets, taking down the robots as you come across them and directing civilians towards safer areas. Up ahead you can see Steve and Thor fighting a mass of robots. You shoot one coming up behind Steve and then spin around, grabbing two more and slamming their heads together with all your strength.

"I see you started without me boys."

"Plenty left," Steve pants, bashing one with his shield.

"Alright, we're all clear here," Clint calls over the comm.

"We are not clear," Steve radios back as another wave of the robots appear, "We are very not clear!"

"Alright, coming to you."

"Romanoff!" Steve roars suddenly, and you turn to see him throwing his shield to Natasha to protect her from an attacking robot. You turn back just in time to have a robotic fist connect with your face. Your thrown backwards, skidding across the pavement until your back hits an abandoned car, snapping your neck forward and knocking the wind out of you.

"(Y/n)?!" Steve exclaims and you lift a hand to tell him you're alright before wiping the blood from your face and climbing to your feet. You empty your clip into the one that hit you, before holstering your empty gun. You move into position with Steve, back to back and then you start tearing at anything you can reach with your brute strength.

"Think that's the last of them?" You ask Steve as Thor takes down the last robot.

Steve shakes his head, "The next wave's gonna hit any minute. What have you got Stark?"

"Well...nothing great. Maybe a way to blow up the city. That'll keep it from impacting the surface if you guys can get clear."

"I asked for a solution, not an escape plan."

"Impact radius is getting bigger every second. We're going to have to make a choice."

"Cap…" Natasha says, "These people are going nowhere. If Stark finds a way to blow this rock…"

"Not until everybody's safe."

"Everyone up here versus everyone down there? There's no math there."

"She's right Steve," You say gently, "A city versus the world."

"I'm not leaving this rock with one civilian on it." Steve says firmly.

"I didn't say we should leave," You and Steve turn to look at Romanoff, "There's worse ways to go. Where else am I gonna get a view like this?"

"Glad you like the view Romanoff," Nick Fury's voice fills your earpiece, "It's about to get better." At his words a helicarrier rises over the edge of the city. "Nice, right? I pulled her out of mothballs with a couple of old friends. She's dusty, but she'll do."

"Fury, you son of a bitch," Steve says, and your lips quirk up.

"Oooh! You kiss your mother with that mouth?" A bunch of lifeboats start flying towards you.

"This is SHIELD?" Pietro asks in awe.

"This is what SHIELD's supposed to be." Steve responds with a smile.

"This is not so bad."

"Let's load 'em up," Steve says. You head towards the nearest building where you find a group of people hiding beneath tables in a diner.

"Come on guys, your ride's here." You usher them all out the doors and towards the lifeboats. Above you Rhodey is fighting a group of robots in the air. "Just keep moving, stay with me," You tell the scared civilians. As you get them aboard your earpiece crackles to life.

"Avengers, time to work for a living," Tony says and you roll your eyes.

"What have we been doing this whole time?" You mutter to yourself. You gather with the rest of the team.

"You good?" Pietro asks his sister who nods.

"Romanoff?" Tony calls, "You and Banner better not be playing 'hide the zucchini."

"Relax, shell-head," Natasha says, "Not all of us can fly." A few seconds later she arrives, "What's the drill?"

"This is the drill," Tony replies, pointing to the Vibranium core, "If Ultron gets a hand on the core, we lose."

Ultron lands on the ground in front of you, dust kicking up from the impact.

"Is that the best you can do?" Thor mocks, and an army of robots surrounds Ultron.

"You had to ask." Steve sighs.

"This is the best I can do," Ultron says, "This is exactly what I wanted. All of you, against all of me. How could you possibly hope to stop me?"

"Well, like the old man said," Tony states, "Together."

Natasha tosses you a clip and you slam it into your gun, taking out as many approaching robots as you can get in your sights while your friends fight around you.

"You know, with the benefit of hindsight…" You hear a sudden roar, and Hulk leaps into the room, before punching Ultron and sending him flying while the robots retreat.

"They'll try to leave the city," Thor warns.

"We can't let 'em. Not even one. Rhodey!" Tony calls.

"I'm on it," Rhodey responds. You can hear the sounds of fighting then Rhodey's back on the comm, "Okay, what?"

"We gotta move out," Steve says, "Even I can tell the air is getting thin. You guys get to the boats. I'll sweep for any stragglers, be right behind you."

"Not alone you're not," You tell him, fighting to catch your breath; he wasn't wrong about the air. You weren't sure how the others were coping. He gives you a look that says he thinks he's going on a suicide mission, and you give him a small nod.

"What about the core?" Clint asks.

"I'll protect it. It's my job." Wanda says firmly, "Pietro, get the people on the boats."

"I'm not going to leave you here."

"I can handle this," a robot approaches and before you can fire your gun she destroys it, "Come back for me when everyone else is off. Not before."

You help Steve usher the last of the people onto the lifeboats. "Thor," Tony says, "I'm gonna need you back in the church."

"Is this the last of them?" Thor asks you and Steve nods.

"Yeah. Everyone else is on the carrier."

"You know, if this works, we maybe don't walk away." Tony says.

"Maybe not." You hear a jet overhead and then bullets rain down on you. Steve pushes you down, covering you both with his shield until the barrage passes.

"Get on the helicarrier," Steve tells you firmly.

"Fat chance," You reply, "I'll go when you go."

"(Y/n)," Steve sighs, "I _need_ you to get on that helicarrier. If not for me, or yourself, then for _him_, okay? You need to find him."

His words are like a slap to the face because he was right. What were you doing here, playing heroes? You owed a debt and throwing yourself into danger wasn't the way to pay it. Playing house with the Avengers wasn't the way to pay it. You had lost your way. "You could find him," You tell him but there's no fire behind your words this time.

Steve reaches out and grasps your shoulder, "Stay safe." His fingers linger a moment too long and then he's gone, running away from the helicarrier. You stare after him for a moment before climbing aboard, a stony resolve settling down in the pit of your stomach.

No more playing around, no more parties, no more friends. It was time to find the Soldier.


	18. Chapter 18

You're sitting outside the new compound, you can hear the voices of Steve, Tony, and Thor floating over to you as they approach. "Well, the Vision's artificial intelligence," Steve says, a small smile on his lips.

"A machine," Tony agrees immediately.

"So it doesn't count." You cock your head curiously, and then Tony adds, "No, it's not like a _person_ lifting the hammer."

"Sounds like someone's upset they can't get it up," You smile cheekily, "Hello boys."

"Lady (Y/n)," Thor smiles in greeting, "If he can wield the hammer he can keep the Mind Stone. It's safe with the VIsion and these days safe is in short supply."

They fall silent for a moment before Steve continues, "But, if you put the hammer in an elevator…"

"It would still go up," Tony finishes.

"Elevator's not worthy," Steve concludes.

"I'm going to miss these little talks of ours," Thor grins.

"Well not if you don't leave."

"I have no choice. The Mind Stone is the fourth of the Infinity Stones to show up in the last few years. That's not a coincidence. Someone has been playing an intricate game and has made pawns of us. But once all these pieces are in position…"

"Triple Yahtzee?" Tony offers.

"You think you can find out what's coming?" Steve asks.

"I do. Care to join Lady (Y/n)? I could use another capable warrier at my side."

"Thanks Thor," You tell him, "But I've got business here. Send me a postcard though."

"Fare thee well," Thor says and then flies up into a beam that appears, leaving a scorched circle of grass.

"That man has no regard for lawn maintenance. I'm gonna miss him though. And you're gonna miss me."

"Yeah, yeah," You tell Tony, "I'll cry myself to sleep tonight."

"You sure you won't stick around? Help me whip these grunts into shape?" Steve asks you.

"I'm not an Avenger Steve. I don't belong here."

"Is this about what Ultron said?"

"No. But he wasn't wrong. I'm not a hero. I wasn't brainwashed into doing what I did. I just did it. I've killed so many people."

"So have I."

"In a _war_," You correct him, "For the greater good. I did it for the people you went to war against. _I'm a bad person._"

"You're not," Steve replies firmly, "I know you're not. It doesn't matter what you did. This could be a fresh start. Stay."

"I can't just start a new chapter before the previous one is finished," You remind him, "He's the one who deserved freedom, not me. Nothing matters until he's safe," You take a deep breath, "I'll be in touch."


	19. Chapter 19

Despite your point blank refusal, Stark had insisted on setting you up somewhere nicer than the roach motel you had been planning on checking yourself into until you found something more permanent. You had finally reached an agreement on a relatively inexpensive apartment in Harlem though that hadn't stopped Stark from furnishing it with cushy armchairs and sleek appliances half of which you weren't sure what they even _did_. You both agreed it was temporary but for different reasons. You were sure that you were going to be on the move again soon enough. Stark thought you would "come to your senses" and back to the compound.

And _god_ did you want to. You missed Sam, his joking demeanor and his constant flirting. You missed Natasha's quick wit and aloof personality. You missed Stark's endless font of sarcasm and Bruce's calm demeanor (and idly wondered where he could possibly be). And you missed Steve's comforting and supportive presence. You missed the team.

You let out a soft sigh and grab your cup of tea from the counter. You curl up on the sofa, tucking your legs underneath you and pick up a tablet - another of Stark's insistent gifts. You press a button and soft music fills the air in the room, a gentle unimposing melody. You click another icon and type in your password at the prompt, allowing you to access your encrypted files.

An hour later you're completely absorbed in your reading, your cup of tea sits forgotten on the table next to you as your eyes scan the various scanned documents. There was something you were missing; if you could just figure out what document was sending off warning bells in your head. You scroll back several pages and then flip to a map, your head unconsciously tilting in curiosity before you flip back to the document. You could feel something there, about to click, and then your phone rings.

"Shit," You tilt your head back and take a deep breath before you glance over; a smiling picture of Steve pops up on the screen and you let your breath out in a weary sigh. You hesitate for a moment before your fingers swipe to answer, "Steve."

"(Y/n)," He sounds relieved, "It's been awhile."

"Yeah. Well," You pause, but he doesn't say anything. "So what world ending event is going on this time?"

"It's nothing like that," He sounds hurt now, "We've got a line on Rumlow. Thought you might want in." Your free hand curls into a fist and you have to consciously force yourself to relax.

"As much as I'd love to kill that son of a bitch I'll have to pass," You tell him lightly, "But send him my regards."

"Right. Okay." You can hear him breathing on the other end, but he doesn't say anything else. Finally you let out the breath you had been holding in a sigh.

"I'm close Steve. And right now that's my main priority. I thought it was yours too. I thought we were in this together."

"(Y/n)..." Steve starts, but you cut him off.

"No, it's fine. You've got the team. I understand."

"A team which I wanted you to be part of," He reminds you, "You're the one who left."

"Well, I'm not much of a team player," You tell him, "Be careful Steve."

"(Y/n)-" You hang up the call, cutting him off and pick back up your tablet, running your finger down the map. You had been combing through these files for ages, but you finally had a lead-a lukewarm lead, sure, but at least it wasn't DOA. It seemed like your little intuition that maybe the Soldier wasn't working for HYDRA was looking more and more like reality. And that meant it was your best chance to strike.

You push away from your desk and head towards your bedroom, you'd catch a couple hours and then see about cashing in a favor from Tony: a ride to Romania.

To your surprise Stark picks up on the first ring; he was a busy man and you were expecting to leave a message. "I literally had your number dialed," he says promptly, "I guess you heard?"

"I don't think so. What's up?"

"Turn on the news," You walk past the TV, jabbing the on button with your finger as you pass. Images of destruction fill the screen and you mute it with the remote as you settle down into your armchair.

"Wow. Talk about a botched job. Is everyone okay?"

"More or less," Stark pauses, "Listen, I need you to come in. There's some things we need to talk about."

"What kind of things?"

"Listen kid, I got the Secretary of State here breathing down my neck. He needs you here, so I need you here. Capiche?"

"Yeah, not _capiche_," You sit up, "Whatever happened and whatever's going on, I got no part in it. The Secretary of State shouldn't even know I exist."

"You're one of us."

"I'm really not."

"Okay, fine. People saw you with us and assumptions were made. Is that better?"

"No it's not _better_," You snap. You take a deep breath, fighting to control your temper, "Stark, what's going on?"

"The powers that be are concerned that the Avengers have a little too much power and a little too much freedom. They want us to sign a contract stating that we won't act without permission so what you see on the news," You glance up, a frown on your lips, "Doesn't happen again."

"I'm not going to do that Tony," You say slowly, on your feet now, "You know that. If I come there right now there's a 50/50 chance I end up in a government prison."

"I wouldn't let that happen."

"I can't take that chance," You grab your duffle bag from under your bed and start methodically packing away your weapons, the phone tucked between your shoulder and ear as you work.

"Okay. I get it. Just do me a favor though; stay where you are. Don't do anything stupid and this will all work itself out."

You toss a bundle of clothes in at random and zip up the bag, "You know me Tony," You say lightly, holstering your .45, "I'm the very soul of caution."

Outside your apartment you eye the sleek black car parked outside longingly but you didn't think you were paranoid in thinking that it would be nothing for Stark to track it, even if you ditched the plates. Hell, for all you knew there was some kind of tracking device in it already. Instead you take a cab to the airport and take a nondescript sedan from the long-term lot.

You weren't taking any chances where the government of any country was involved, and it was with that thought that you drove out of the city, leaving the New York skyline behind you.


	20. Chapter 20

You scramble for the gun under your pillow, heavy breaths racking your body. You blink at the darkness with your finger tight against the trigger; after a few seconds you fall back onto the bed panting. Nightmares. Again. You set your gun down on the bedside table, covering your face with your hands for a few heartbeats before you climb to your feet. The faint morning light illuminates the dingy motel room around you and your eyes catch on the file you had left lying on the counter of the kitchenette the night before. You make your way over, hitting the lightswitch with your palm and flip open the cover. You pick up the picture just inside: a yellowing photo of James Buchanan Barnes. He's barely recognizable as the man you know; a sergeant's hat sits jauntily on top of his head while his lips are curled in a cocky smile. You set it down and pick up the second photo, this one is instantly recognizable as the Winter Soldier; cold blue eyes look out from beneath shaggy brown hair.

With a sigh you shut the folder and toss it into the duffle bag sitting on the sofa. You were paid through until the end of the week but… Something had you on edge. It was time to go.

A clink grabs your attention and you freeze in place, listening carefully. Footsteps on the fire escape; three pairs. You silently walk backwards into the bedroom and pick up your pistol. In the living area you can hear the window slowly sliding open. You stand with your back against the wall next to the door, gun at the ready. As the first person enters your bedroom you cock the gun, pressing it against the side of their head. "Don't fucking-" You blink, "Jesus Christ Steve," You breathe, "What the hell were you thinking? I was half a second away from blowing your head off." You shove your gun into the waistband of your sweats, "Who's with you?"

"Hey gorgeous," Sam comes up behind Steve with a wide smile, hands held up, "Long time no see. Is that a .45 in your pants or are you just happy to see me?"

"Both," You admit with a small smile of your own, "I've left you both a dozen messages, what the hell is going on? Steve I-Wait. Who else is with you? Nat?"

"Have you seen the news?" He interrupts.

"That's what I was trying to tell you," You say, exasperated, "That wasn't him-the bombing-It couldn't have been. I know where he is-"

"Romania," Steve interrupts and you blink stupidly.

"How did you know that?"

"Buck," Steve says quietly.

"What-" Your mouth moves soundlessly for a moment when he steps into view, before your brain finally catches up with your eyes. "Hey soldier," You say finally, "It's been awhile."

"Bucky," He says. His eyes crinkle at the corners when he gives you a small smile.

You can feel everyone's eyes on the two of you and you force yourself to break the extended eye contact, "Were you followed?" You shift your eyes to Steve's face.

"Doubtful, but we should keep moving," Sam says, "What's up with the roach motel anyway? I think I liked your apartment in the city a little more."

"Yeah me too," You smile, "Then Stark called and started talking about the Sokovia accords; I don't know why he thought I would come in; if the government knew who I was I'd either be dead or in prison. So I ditched everything and got out of Dodge. I've been moving every few weeks, can't be too careful I guess. How did you even find me?"

"Called in some favors," Steve tells you, "And Bucky knew your old aliases. We took a shot, and here you are."

"So what's going on?"

"I'll explain on the way," Steve runs his hand through his hair, "We need to pick some things up."

"Sounds good," You grab your tactical suit off the dresser, "Just let me slip into something a little more...bulletproof," You say, sending Sam a wink.

"We'll be outside," Steve nods.

"You," You lock eyes with the Soldier, "Stay for a second." When the other two leave you peel off your shirt, watching as the Soldier looks pointedly away. "So, you remember me?"

"Yes."

You kick off your sweatpants and pull on the one piece tactical suit before sitting down on the bed to pull on your boots. The Soldier finally looks at you. "Last time I saw you you _shot_ me," You tell him.

"I'm sorry," His eyes flicker down again, "They wiped me, fed me a bunch of-"

"I know," You interrupt, "I'm not mad, I'm impressed," His eyes land on yours, "Didn't think you had it in you. I mean, you were probably aiming for something two feet from me but-"

"Oh is that how it is?" He gives you another small smile as you climb to your feet, holstering your pistol, "You outshoot me one time and it's all I hear."

"I'm entitled to give you shit now and again," You tell him, looking over your shoulder as you head to the door, "Afterall, you shot me _twice_."


	21. Chapter 21

"Who's the blonde?" You ask as Steve pulls the car over on the shoulder; twenty or so feet away a woman stands leaning against the trunk of a black sedan.

"Agent Peggy Carter," Steve puts the car into park, "I'll just be a minute."

"Can you move your seat up?" The Soldier asks Sam.

"No."

"Wilson," You snap, "Move your damn seat up." Sam turns to shoot you a glare before he moves his seat up, grumbling something under his breath. "Don't be a child," You tell him before glancing over at the Soldier. You keep feeling his eyes on you, but every time you glance at him he looks away; this time is no exception.

You look out the windshield instead to see what's taking Steve, in time to see him pull the pretty young agent into a kiss; you glance at the Soldier again, he's watching as well with a small smile on his lips. His eyes shift to you and he opens his mouth to say something before he quickly turns to look back out the window as Steve approaches.

Steve pulls the car in a spot next to a grey van and you all climb out.

"Hey guys," Clint says.

"You know I wouldn't have called if I had any other choice," Steve tells him.

"Hey man, you're doing me a favor. Besides, I owe a debt."

"Thanks for having my back," Steve says, turning to Wanda.

"It was time for me to get off my ass."

"Retirement too boring for you?" You ask Clint with a smile. His eyes shift to you, and he breaks out in a smile.

"Oh good, you're here. That means shit's really gonna hit the fan right?"

"Not if I can help it," Steve says seriously, "How about our other recruit?"

"Other recruit?" You ask, "I thought you said everyone else was with Tony on this."

"He's new. A guy Sam met," Steve tells you, "Scott Lang."

"He's rarin' to go. Had to put a little coffee in him, but...he should be good," Clint slides open the door to the van and a dark haired guy climbs out.

"What timezone is this?"

You look at him doubtfully as Clint says, "Come on, come on."

"Captain America," Lang says, shaking Steve's hand.

"Mr. Lang."

"It's an honor. I'm shaking your hand too long," He drops his hand, "Wow! This is Awesome! Captain America," He looks over at Wanda next, "I know you, too. You're great! I don't know you-" He turns to you, "But you seem great too!" He turns back to Steve, now feeling his shoulders. You bite your lip to hide your grin, "Jeez. Ah, look. I wanna say, I know you know a lot of super people so...Thanks for thinking of me." He glances at Sam, "Hey man."

"What's up Tic Tac?" Sam asks.

"Uh, good to see you. Look, what happened last time when I…"

"It was a great audition," Sam says, "But it'll never happen again."

"Yeah, I'm gonna need that story when all this is over," You say, shooting Sam a grin.

"They tell you what we're up against?"

"Something about some… psycho-assassins?" Lang offers, Sam snorts.

"Yeah we've got two of them on our team."

You shoot Sam a glare and Steve sighs. "We're outside the law on this one. So, if you come with us, you're a wanted man."

"Yeah, well, what else is new?"

"We should get moving," The Soldier speaks up suddenly.

"We got a chopper lined up," Clint offers. Suddenly the PA system crackles to life around you, speaking rapid fire German.

"That's not good," You mutter.

"They're evacuating the airport," The Soldier clarifies.

"Stark," Sam says.

"Stark?" Lang asks.

"Suit up." Steve says, opening the truck to grab his SHIELD and hand Sam his wings.

You stand in front of Tony and Rhodey, the air between you and Steve and them feels thick with tension.

"Wow, it's so weird how you run into people at the airport. Don't you think that's weird?" Tony says, his trademark sarcastic defensive mechanism at its fullest power.

"Definitely weird," Rhodey responds.

"Hear me out, Tony. That doctor, the psychiatrist, he's behind all of this." Steve says, his tone pleading.

"The Soldier was in Romania when the attack went down Tony," You add, trying to get the two of them to see reason.

"Hi (Y/n)," Tony says, ignoring both your and Steve's protests, "Nice to see you are willing to stick your neck out. Maybe not for your friends, but an old _flame_…"

"I'm not willing to let an innocent man rot in jail Tony, that's what I'm sticking my neck out for."

"Innocent," He scoffs and your eyes narrow.

"If he's guilty then so am I," You remind him, "Even more so. Are you going to lock me up too?" You pause, wetting your lips, "Tony, please. Just hear us out."

Before he can respond a man in a black cat suit leaps over a truck, coming up next to Tony. "Captain."

"Your highness," Steve responds. You're dimly aware of everyone else approaching as Steve and Tony argue.

"Steve…" Nat says carefully, "You know what's about to happen. Do you really want to punch your way out of this one?"

"All right," Tony cuts in, "I've run out of patience. Underoos!" Another figure swings past, before shooting a web and grabbing Steve's shield and binding his hands before landing. "Nice job kid."

"Thanks. Well, I could've stuck the landing a little better. It's just the new suit...Well, it's nothing Mr. Stark. It's perfect. Thank you."

"Yeah, we don't really need to start a conversation."

"Okay. Cap… Captain. Big fan, I'm Spider-Man."

"Yeah, we'll talk about it later. Just…"

"Hey, everyone." The newcomer says.

"Tony," You say, shocked, "That's-he's just a kid."

"You've been busy," Steve frowns.

"And you've been a complete idiot. Dragging in Clint. 'Rescuing' Wanda from a place she doesn't even want to leave. A safe place. Bringing (Y/n) into this. I'm trying to keep… I'm trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart."

"You did that when you signed."

"Alright," Tony snaps, "We're done. You're gonna turn Barnes over, you're gonna come with us. Now. Because it's us! Or a squad of J-SOC guys...with no compunction about being impolite." Steve's mouth settles into a hard line, "Come on."

"We found it," Sam's voice buzzes into your earpiece, "Their Quinjet's in hanger five. North runway." Steve raises his hands into the air and Clint shoots the webbing off.

"Alright, Lang." Steve says. Your eyes meet the Soldier's for a brief moment, and before anyone else can move the two of you take off per Steve's plan, feet thudding on the pavement at an inhuman pace. In the terminal you stop for a moment to get your bearings and then the kid swings through the window, kicking you backwards-hard-in the process.

The Soldier throws a punch and your eyes widen as the kid-Spiderboy or whatever-catches his metal fist in one hand. "You have a metal arm?" He exclaims, "That is awesome dude!" You scramble to your feet and punch him, sending him flying back into a wall.

"I'll give you this kid," You tell him as he hops to his feet, "You're definitely eating your wheaties. Some kind of serum? Human growth hormone? Radiation?"

"Spider bite."

"Really? Huh. Spider bite. Cute." Before he can respond you launch yourself at him, and he blocks you blow for blow.

"I really don't want to hit a girl," He exclaims.

"Then hit me," The Soldier lunges forward and you duck out of the way to give him room, but the kid dodges, flinging himself into the air and right into Redwing's path, which carries him outside.

"Y'all were getting beat up by a twelve year old," Sam scoffs, "Super soldiers my ass."

"Screw you bird-boy," You snap, "Come on, let's get to the jet."

The three of you meet up with Steve and the rest of the team outside and you head towards the Quinjet. Suddenly a beam of energy slices across the runway, blocking your path. You look up to see Vision hovering overhead.

"Captain Rogers," Vision says, "I know you believe what you're doing is right. But for the collective good you must surrender now."

Behind you Tony and the others arrive.

"What do we do Cap?" Sam asks.

"We fight." Steve responds, his tone firm.

"This is gonna end well," Natasha says, as you once again face off against each other. As you run forward you see the Panther's eyes focused on the soldier and you launch yourself at him, wrapping your arm around his neck and using your momentum to flip him backwards onto the ground.

"You protect a murderer," he growls, and you shake your head, using your weight to keep him down.

You let out a soft yelp as he shoves you off of him easily. You struggle to catch your fooding and then his fist connects with your jaw, throwing you backwards. You land hard on the ground with a hard exhale. Steve didn't mention all the enhanced Tony had managed to round up. You were definitely on even footing. It also didn't help that you worked best when you didn't have to worry about _not_ killing people. Trying to keep your strength tempered definitely slowed you down. Unfortunately it was not slowing down the Soldier and the man in the cat suit; you watch as they grab each other by the throats.

"I didn't kill your father," You hear the Soldier tell him.

"Then why did you run?" The man asks before ripping the Soldier's hand from his neck. He kicks him backwards before launching himself at him claws drawn. You fling yourself forward and tackle him away from the Soldier, ignoring the pain of road rash on your exposed skin as you slide on the pavement. Before he can attack a red light surrounds him and he's flung away from you. You throw Wanda a thankful look as you climb back to your feet.

"We gotta go," The Soldier calls to Steve, "That guy's probably in Siberia by now."

"We gotta draw out the flyers," Steve says, "I'll take Vision. You two get to the jet."

"No, you go too," Sam responds over the comm, above you he mauvers through the air trying to evade Rhodie's attacks, "The rest of us aren't getting out of here."

"As much as I hate to admit it, if we're gonna win this one some of us might have to lose it," Clint chimes in.

"This isn't the real fight Steve," Sam tells him and you toss him a sympathetic look.

"They're right Steve. We need to go if we're gonna go. We might not get another chance, and if those other soldiers get activated…"

"Alright," Steve sighs, "Sam what's the play?"

"We need a diversion. Something big," Sam says.

"I got something kind of big…" Lang chimes in suddenly, "But I can't hold it very long. On my signal, run like hell. And if I tear myself in half… Don't come back for me."

"He's gonna tear himself in half?" The Soldier asks.

"I sure as hell hope not," You reply and glance at Steve confused.

"You sure about this Scott?" Steve asks him.

"I do it all the time. I mean once. In a lab. Then I passed out." You run your hands over your face, suppressing a sigh. "I'm the boss. I'm the boss. I'm the boss."

"Steve-maybe-" You start, before Scott Lang is towering over the airport.

"I guess that's the signal," Steve says dumbfounded.

"Guess so. Come on boys. Let's get out of here before Lang tears himself in half." The three of you use Lang's distraction to sprint towards the jet. Vision shoots a beam of light and the control tower collapses in front of the entrance to the hanger. Luckily the rubble is engulfed in Wanda's red glow and the three of you have just enough time to run inside where Natasha is waiting.

"You're not gonna stop," Natasha says.

"You know I can't," Steve replies.

"And you (Y/n)?" She looks in your direction, "You'll be on the run again."

"Was I ever not?"

"I'm gonna regret this," She sighs, before stunning the Panther who had been coming up behind you, "Go."


	22. Chapter 22

"Jesus Christ Steve," You groan, falling into the cop-pilot seat, "That was…"

"I know," He responds through a clenched jaw.

"What's gonna happen to your friends?" The Soldier asks.

"Whatever it is… I'll deal with it."

"We'll deal with it," You tell Steve firmly.

"Yeah? So now that the Avengers are finished you finally want to be one of us?" You recoil as if he had physically slapped you. You bite the inside of your cheek to stop the bitter retort that threatens to escape your lips before you stand up.

"I'm gonna go patch myself up," You force your face and tone to show no emotion as you walk past both of them to the back of the jet.

You open the first aid kit-which was in desperate need of replacement. It had been heavily picked through and only scraps remained. You supposed it was a hazard of the job. In the bottom of the locker it had been in was a dirty rag and you grabbed it with a sigh. Dumping a bottle of water over it to wet it you wipe the blood from your arms and face.

You're sitting with the blood soaked rag clenched in your hand when the Soldier takes the seat next to you.

"So. Long time no see Soldier."

"Bucky," He offers again, and you glance away.

"That's your name?"

"Yeah. I uh… Started to remember things."

"That's good…" You trail off.

"You've got blood smeared all over your face," The Soldier-Bucky says, a hint of laughter in his voice, "Here."

You watch his face as he takes the rag from your hand and brings it to your face, gently wiping away the residue you had missed. Finished, he hands it back to you and you toss it onto the floor against the wall.

His piercing eyes meet yours and you can't hold back the words any longer, "I've been looking for you, I want you to know that- I need you to know that. I didn't just abandon you. You could've come with me but you didn't. That isn't on me."

"You think-" He sounds astounded, "It _isn't_ on you. I wanted you to go. I just couldn't. Not with them in my head."

"And now? What now?"

"I don't know."

"You tried to kill me the last time we met," You tell him, and he holds up his hands in a half shrug as if to say 'it happens'. "You thought I betrayed you."

"That's exactly why I couldn't come with you," Bucky says, "If they found me, they could've _made _me kill you. Activated me one night while you were sleeping."

"I wouldn't let that happen," You tell him, your voice almost a whisper, "We would've been alright together."

"You can't know that," He replies, his eyes dropping to his hands.

"Guys," Steve calls, "Found his truck. Coming in for landing now."

You rise to your feet as the jet lands, checking your weapons and ammo while Bucky looks through Romanoff's gun rack before selecting a machine gun. Steve joins you and the three of you stand in a row waiting for the exit ramp to descend.

"You remember that time we had to ride back from Rockaway Beach in the back of that freezer truck?" Steve asks.

"Was that the time we used out train money to buy hot dogs?" Bucky responds and you glance over at him surprised. He really had started to remember things.

"You blew three bucks trying to win that stuffed bear for a redhead," Steve chuckles.

"What was her name again?" Bucky asks.

"Dolores," Steve tells him, "You called her Dot."

"She's gotta be a hundred years old right now," Bucky says with a shake of his head.

"So are we pal," Steve clamps his hand down on Bucky's shoulder and you follow behind them, your lip clenched between your teeth.

"He can't have been here more than a few hours," Steve says as you enter the building.

"Long enough to wake them up," Bucky responds darkly.

The three of you maneuver around the bunker, your hand clenched around the handle of your gun. A loud thud sounds behind you and your turn aiming down the corridor at a set of double doors.

"You ready?" Steve asks.

"Yeah," Bucky nods while you cock your gun in response. The doors are forced open and your mouth falls open as Tony appears behind him, fully suited.

"You seem a little defensive," Tony says, the helmet flipping up. His eyes are focused on the barrel of your gun. Neither you nor Bucky lower your weapons as Steve slowly approaches, his shield covering his body.

"It's been a long day," Steve tells him.

"At ease soldiers," Tony calls over to the pair of you, "I'm not currently after you."

"Then why are you here?" Steve demands.

"Could be your story's not so crazy," Tony says, "Maybe. Ross has no idea I'm here. I'd like to keep it that way. Otherwise I gotta arrest myself."

"Well that sounds like a lot of paperwork," Steve lowers his shield, "It's good to see you Tony." You let out the breath you had been holding and holster your weapon.

"You too Cap," Tony looks over your shoulder at Bucky, "Hey. Manchurian Candidate. You're killing me. There's a truce here. You can drop the gun." You nudge the soldier's shoulder with yours and he slowly lowers his gun.

"Well, come on boys. The anticipation is killing me," You smile darkly, "I just want to see what kind of trouble our friend is stirring up here."

Tony takes the lead as you start walking again, the four of you silent until Tony announces that he's got heat signatures.

"How many?" Steve asks.

"Uh...one?" Tony responds. Steve pauses a moment and then steps into the chamber ahead of you. As the lights come on you see the other enhanced soldiers all within their capsules. You look around, confused and then your eyes settle on the gunshot wounds all of them share.

You swallow, your eyes meeting Bucky's. You were lucky the two of you weren't there too with bullets in your skulls.

"If it's any comfort, they died in their sleep," A voice says suddenly over a speaker, "Did you really think I wanted more of you?"

"What the hell?" Bucky asks quietly, while you pull your gun.

"I'm grateful to them though. They brought you here," You don't recognize the man they steps into view from the control room. Steve launches his shield but it just bounces off the glass. "Please, Captain. The Soviets built this chamber to withstand the launch of UR-100 rockets."

"I'm betting I could beat that," Tony tells him.

"Oh, I'm sure you could Mr. Stark, given time. But then you'd never know why you came."

"You killed innocent people in Vienna just to bring us here?" Steve asks, sounding slightly sick.

"I thought about nothing else for over a year. I studied you. I followed you. But now that you're standing here, I just realized. There's a bit of green in the blue of your eyes. How nice to find a flaw."

"Alright, I don't have all day," You snap, "You've got us here, now what the fuck do you want?"

"You're Sokovian, is that what this is about?" Steve demands.

"Sokovia was a failed state long before you blew it to hell," The man says dismissively, "No, I'm here because I made a promise."

"You lost someone?" Steve asks after a pause.

The man clicks his tongue, "I lost everyone. And so will you." A screen comes on next to you and you look over to see an image of a secluded road with the date 12/16/1991 overlayed on it, "An empire toppled by its enemies can rise again," The man continues, "But one which crumples from within? That's dead… forever."

"I know that road," Tony says suddenly, "What is this?"

As the video begins to play you watch a motorcycle force a car off the road and into a tree, and suddenly you know exactly what you're looking at.

"Tony don't watch," You almost beg, stepping into his field of view, "Please. Don't. It's not-" He pushes you out of the way and now you watch, feeling sick as the Soldier climbs off the motorcycle and you put down the kickstand, leaning against the bike while he pulls the man driving out into the road. You watch yourself wrench the trunk open and grab the cargo within while he takes care of the woman.

The video ends as the Soldier shoots the camera, and after a beat of silence Tony lunges towards Bucky. Steve is there immediately, trying to calm him.

"Tony, Tony," Steve tries and Tony rounds on him, his face red with emotion.

"Did you know?" Tony demands, tears in his eyes, "Did you know that your two best buds murdered my _parents_?"

"I didn't know it was them," Steve says.

"Don't bullshit me Rogers! Did you know?"

"Yes," Steve says finally, his voice tight.

"Please, just think about this," You rush out the words and his eyes slide in your direction. "This is what he wants Tony, but I need you to listen to me. _We didn't have a choice_," Your voice breaks on this last word and you see him falter for a moment; before his eyes shift to the blank screen as if it's replaying only for him.

"I trusted you!" Tony growls suddenly, "I opened up to you," He takes a step towards you and you take one back, "All those nights, you never could have mentioned the fact that you and your psycho pal murdered my parents?" Even when he engaged his helmet you were laboring under the delusion that he wouldn't attack you until he did; one metal fist connects with your jaw and in your surprise you don't manage to react until he gets a second hit in. You start to raise your hands to defend yourself when his hand is around your throat. For a moment you're back in the vision Wanda had induced, the Soldier's hand wrapped around your throat and then your back, your fingers prying at the finger's of Tony's suit.

Gunfire erupts and you can hear the bullets ricochet off of his back, Steve yells something but you can't decipher it over the sound of your heartbeat echoing in your ears. With a roar of anger, Tony throws you across the room; your lungs greedily suck in the air until you hit the wall with a loud crack, your head bouncing off of it with a sick thud.

You scramble to your feet at the sound of a loud metallic screech before a wave of dizziness has you reeling back against the wall. The other three are nowhere to be seen but you can hear the fight going on underneath you, you must have been out for a few minutes. You bring your hand up to touch your scalp and immediately pull back your bloody fingers with a hiss; you weren't sure how bad it was yet but it was definitely painful and definitely a bleeder. You'd had worse though.

Steeling yourself against both the pain and the situation you jump down below, landing unsteadily on the ground. Your eyes trail over the carnage in front of you; the Soldier is down, metal arm blown away while Tony stands over him. Before he can deal a finishing blow Steve rushes him with his shield and Tony fires at it sending Steve skidding across the ground where he lands next to the Soldier.

"He was my friend," Steve tells Tony weakly.

"So was I," Tony says, cocking his fist back. You throw yourself at him, landing on his back neatly; Stark lets out a yell of frustration before reaching back to grab the back of your shirt, throwing you down next to Steve. "Stay down. Both of you. Final warning."

Steve struggles to his feet, his face bloody. You can see he's dead on his feet; you couldn't remember the last time either of you had slept. He raises his fist, staring down Tony, "I can do this all day."

You spring up as well, ignoring the dizziness and the blood running down your face, "You don't want to do this," You tell him, "Please." There's no warning before a beam of light shoots from his hand, hitting you in the abdomen. The pain is immediate and you're forced into a half spin from the impact before you crumple. You draw in a ragged breath, idly wondering if your ribs were broken or if it was something worse.

This wasn't going to stop until one of you was dead, you realized with growing horror, if you got up again that was it; you'd have to kill Tony. There was no other way. And you couldn't do it.

Just before Tony could shoot Steve the Soldier reaches out and grabs his leg, giving Steve a chance to attack while Tony rounds on Bucky. This time Steve manages to get him down, his shield sticking out of Tony's chest plating. But you're all still breathing, and that was more than you could have hoped for.

You pull yourself to your feet as Steve rips his shield from Tony's chest, clutching your abdomen as you try to ignore the pain. Steve helps the Soldier to his feet and you limp over, hooking his remaining arm over your shoulder as Steve wraps his arm around his waist.

"That shield doesn't belong to you!" Tony shouts as the three of you head towards the exit, "You don't deserve it! My father made that shield!"

Steve pauses, shifting Bucky's weight more firmly onto you and then drops the shield. You can still hear the echo of the vibranium hitting the ground when you step out into the fresh air.


	23. Chapter 23

You sit on the edge of the bed, your arms resting at your sides as you look around the Wakandan medical facility. Even though you had insisted you were fine, they had still patched you up, wrapping your broken ribs and bandaging your many lacerations. All in all you have had worse. You weren't sure you had ever _felt_ worse, but that was a different story.

"You sure about this?" Steve asks, and Bucky nods.

"I can't trust my own mind. So until they figure out how to get this stuff out of my head I think going back under is the best thing for everybody," He glances at you and your lips tighten into a hard line.

Steve nods, resigned, and crosses the room towards the window. After a moment you stand as well, moving to where Bucky was sitting on his own bed. You sit gingerly next to him, neither of you saying anything.

"You gonna try and talk me out of it?" He says finally, still not looking at you.

You pause, "No. I know there's no changing your mind. I'm staying though."

"You-" He swings his head around, his eyes meeting yours, "No. Absolutely not. You're not going to waste your life waiting for if or when they manage to fix me. You've done enough, you don't owe me anything."

"I don't know that that's true," You say softly, reaching your fingers up to where his remaining hand lays resting on his leg. You slowly intertwine your fingers, avoiding his heavy gaze.

"Mr. Barnes," A soft voice says, and you turn to see the king's sister approaching, "Are you ready?" He nods, and you let your fingers drop from his.

You can't watch as they put him into cryo. It was something you had hoped to never see or experience again. You couldn't imagine going into it voluntarily. Steve's outside waiting for you, leaning against the stolen Quinjet.

"Are you okay?" He asks as you join him.

"No," You say after a second's hesitation, "Are you?"

"No," Steve sighs, "You're staying?" You give him a look and he smiles, tapping his ear with one finger, "I can't help it. You should know better."

"Yeah, I should."

"I had a feeling you would. I'm glad. Someone should be here when he wakes up."

"What's next for Captain Rogers?"

"They've got the rest of the team… Well the ones that sided with us at least at the Raft. I guess I'm going to break them out."

"Good. Flying under the radar. No risky ventures. Very smart," You smile to let him know you're joking, "If you need me for anything just call okay? And… I'm sorry. For everything."

"Me too," Steve sighs, you reach up and wrap your arms around him, burying your face into his neck, "Let me know if anything changes."

"I will."


	24. Chapter 24

You stand next to Okoye with the Dora Milaje, tugging at your new clothing. Around you thousands of Wakandans stand according to their tribe all overlooking a pool of water. After you had gotten settled in Shuri had whisked away your dirty and damaged combat suit for repairs and upgrades so you now wore a plain back tunic style shirt with matching pants. In the center of the water stands a man holding a massive spear.

"I, Zuri, son of Badu give to you, Prince T'Challa, the Black Panther!" He holds up some kind of ceremonial bowl, "The Prince will now have the strength of the Black Panther stripped away." T'Challa opens his mouth and Zuri pours the concoction within the bowl into his waiting mouth. He chokes on the deep red fluid, his body spasming as the liquid goes to work. "Damaku…"

The crowd behind you responds with the same.

"Victory in ritual combat comes by yield or death. If any tribe wishes to put forth a warrier, I now offer a path to the throne."

"The Merchant Tribe will not challenge today," An elderly man calls out. The other tribes follow suit.

"Is there any member of royal blood who wishes to challenge for the throne?"

Your eyes widen as Shuri raises her hand and a low murmur tears through the crowd. "This corset is really uncomfortable," She calls out, "So could we all just wrap it up and go home?"

In the water you can see T'Challa smiling and shaking his head. A loud drumming suddenly erupts around you followed by the sound of the chant. You look around, curious, until you notice the figures filing out of the cave. Their bodies are covered in a wooden armor and they carry javelin-esque spears. As the last figure emerges, Okoye readies the Dora Milaj. You weren't carrying a gun today, but your hand drops to the holstered knife on your hip as a reflex.

"M'Baku," Zuri confronts the large man, "What are you doing here?"

"It's Challenge Day," M'Baku says simply, "We have watched and listened from the mountains. We have watched with disgust as your technological advancements have been overseen by a child who scoffs at tradition," M'Baku points his spear at Shuri, "And now you want to hand the nation over to this prince," He steps forward, now almost nose to nose with T'Challa, "Who could not even keep his own father safe? Hmm? We will not have it! I said he will not have it!" There's a pause, "I, M'Baku, leader of the Jabari wish to-"

"I accept your challenge, M'Baku," T'Challa interrupts.

Zuri steps forward, putting a panther mask on T'Challa while M'Baku dons a wooden gorilla mask. He clenches his fist, and the Jabari soldiers form a semicircle behind him, pointing their spears at his back. In turn, T'Challa calls for the Dora. As she passes you, Okoye gives you a small nod, and you let your hand fall away from your knife. With everyone in position, Zuri raises his hand, looking nervous. "Let the challenge begin!"

You watched impressed as the two warriors begin to fight. Although you had fought T'Challa before that had been when he had his enhanced abilities. Without them he was a normal human but both were impressive on their own. T'Challa dodges a series of punches before he's driven back by the tip of M'Baku's spear against his shield. He manages to knock the spear free but is forced onto his back. With practiced speed he's on his feet again, dodging attacks before he counters with a kick.

M'Baku spits blood and bangs on his chest while his warriors shout around him. T'Challa salutes the crowd and they roar back in approval. M'Baku charges T'Challa who grabs his spear, cartwheeling over it to land another kick. M'Baku delivers a backhand that knocks T'Challa off of his feet in front of the Dora's spears. With the spears at his back and M'Baku at his front T'Challa is forced to go on the defensive, blocking M'Baku's overhead blows with his shield.

You watch, horrified as M'Baku's spear gets closer and closer to T'Challa's chest and then T'Challa manages to put some distance between them. He rushes forward for an aerial attack but M'Baku anticipates it and delivers a hard kick to the Prince's chest, knocking both his shield and spear from his hand.

"Where is your God now?" M'Baku demands as T'Challa dodges his spear. M'Baku wraps his arms around the smaller man before bringing his head forward in a harsh headbutt, laughing through his mask. "No powers, no claws," M'Baku taunts, "No special suit. Just a boy, not fit to lead."

"Show him who you are!" The queen shouts out from the sidelines.

As if her voice had awoken him, T'Challa shakes off the headbutt and delivers a quick blow to free himself from M'Baku, but takes M'Baku's spear to his shoulder in the process. "I am prince T'Challa," He shouts, "Son of King T'Chaka!"

"You can do this T'Challa!" Shuri screams. T'Challa manages to wedge M'Baku's spear under his foot, pulling M'Baku to the pool before flipping his body and choking him with his leg. M'Baku fights, but can't find the strength to escape.

"Yield!" T'Challa demands, "Don't make me kill you!"

"I would rather die!"

T'Challa tightens his grip, and you can see the fight running out of M'Baku's face, "What would the proud Jabari do without you?" T'Challa asks, "You have fought with honor, now yield! Your people need you." At these words, M'Baku looks up at the Jabari warriors, "Yield man!" T'Challa almost begs. Slowly, M'Baku reaches out and taps T'Challa's arm, who immediately releases him. T'Challa struggles to his feet and the crowd erupts as he lifts his arm.

"I present to you," Zuri says, stepping forward, "King T'Challa, the Black Panther!"

"Zuri," T'Challa responds.

"My king." The drums begin to beat again and in the crowd people begin to dance.

T'Challa looks into the crowd before shouting, "Wakanda Forever," which is echoed by the Wakandan people.


	25. Chapter 25

The next day finds you walking into Shuri's lab, "That was intense," You tell her as you walk in.

"My brother is strong," She replies simply.

"Have you had anymore progress?" She turns to you, an affectionately annoyed look on her face, "Right, sorry."

"It's only been a few days, and a busy few days," Shuri smiles, "It will take time, but it will be done. He is someone special to you?"

"We were partners a long time ago. I looked for him for a long time and when I finally found him…" You trail off, gesturing in the direction of the cryogenic chamber.

"This was when you were an assassin?" Shuri gives you a shy smile at the look on your face, "Sorry-My brother told me not to mention it."

"No, it's fine," You tell her, "Yeah. He was my partner when I was with HYDRA."

"And you were given the same type of serum as Steve Rogers, right?"

"I don't know if it was the same one, but something similar. Same as the Soldier-Bucky, I mean at least. I was young when HYDRA took me, twelve or thirteen. I was just a scrawny kid. They trained me from the time I got there. Got my reflexes razor sharp before they gave me the serum. Bucky was already a Sergeant in the military, so they wanted me to have the same edge it gave him. They gave me the serum when I was around seventeen. Grew about four inches. Couldn't get enough to eat. Haven't been sick since though, so I guess it's not all bad. Sorry," You laugh suddenly, "I'm not sure why I told you all that."

"No it's fine," Shuri assures you, "Trust me, I'm very curious about the strays my brother brought home."

"Shuri," You turn to see T'Challa walking towards you.

"My king," Shuri says with a dramatic bow.

"Stop it," T'Challa says, "Stop it." Shuri laughs and they do some kind of secret handshake.

"I've already sent a car ahead to Busan for you," Shuri pauses, "Who are you taking with you to Korea?"

"Okoye," T'Challa responds, "And Nakia as well."

At this Shuri makes a face, "You sure it's a good idea to take your ex on a mission?"

"Yes," T'Challa says, "We'll be fine. Besides you will be on call should we need backup. However I have been thinking. (Y/n), there is an old enemy of Wakanda that we recently gained information on. I am going to bring him to justice for his crimes against Wakanda. I would like you to join me."

"Ah! What perfect timing then that I would finish this," Shuri grins before heading over to a workstation, "I've made some small adjustments to your combat suit. You can go get ready while I finish talking to my brother about a few things." Your eyes drift over to the cryo-chamber, your suit clutched in your hand, "He will still be here when you get back, I promise. Now go, help my brother."

"I'd be glad to help," You say finally, "It's the least I can do."

You're quiet on the ride over; although Shuri had repaired your suit you weren't wearing it. Instead you were wearing a knee length black dress with a plunging neckline and a pair of matching heels that Okoye had loaned you. Your hair was pulled up into an elegant hairdo, and when you step out of the black Lexus you feel like the picture of luxury.

"This way," Nakia says.

"Bast willing this goes quickly," Okoye says, "And I can't get this ridiculous thing off my head."

"It looks nice," Nakia tells her, "Just whip it back and forth."

"What? It's a disgrace!" Okoye exclaims quietly. Nakia stops in front of an old woman selling fish in front of an alley and greets her by name in Korean. The woman doesn't smile back.

"Who are these three?" The woman responds back in Korean.

"My friends from Kenya," Nakia replies easily, "Very deep pockets. They're good."

"Good for trouble like you?" The old woman demands, then smiles. A large Korean man emerges from the alley and motions for you all to follow him.

You enter a small dark room. On the far end is a door with two more guards on either side. You each go through a metal detector and then the door is opened and you're allowed to pass through.

You find yourself on the balcony overlooking the casino. As you look around the first warning bell goes through your head. This place seemed familiar, but all high class hidden casinos had a similar feel.

"Spread out," T'Challa orders, "The buyer is likely already here." T'Challa and Nakia head for the first floor, while you and Okoye take opposite sides of the balcony. You grab a drink from a waiter as you pass and lean against the railing, sipping at it as you look around casually. On the comm you can hear T'Challa and Nakia flirting with one another.

"Can we please focus?" Okoye says, affectionately annoyed. Down below T'Challa and Nakia split up, T'Challa heading towards the pit and Nakia to the bar, "Thank you."

"Eyes up," Nakia says casually, "Americans. I count… Three."

"Five," Okoye disagrees, "How could you miss 'greased lightning' there behind you."

"Six," T'Challa says, "I just spotted an old friend who works for the CIA. It just got a little more complicated." T'Challa approaches the CIA agent and begins talking to him.

"Ahh, Miss Astin, I thought that was you." You almost spit out your drink as you turn to see a well dressed man standing near you, "It's been too long." You will your brain to move quicker as he gives you a rueful smile. Astin. Astin. Busan.

"Mr. Samuels," You reply in an effortless English accent, "What a pleasure." You smile, holding out your hand, which he takes and presses it to his lips.

"The pleasure is all mine," He responds, "It's been years hasn't it?"

"Ages," You tell him, but your eyes are on the men who had just entered the casino.

"Klaue plus eight," Nakia tells you over the comm.

"I see them. (Y/n)'s got someone talking to her," Okoye responds, "Tuck your hair behind your ear if everything's alright."

"I'm surprised you remember me," You tell him, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, "Flattered, really." Over the comms the situation is getting worse by the minute, "But I really must be going, people waiting for me."

"Wait," The man grabs your arm as you turn to go, "You know, last time you were in here you spent a lot of time talking to my brother. In fact, I remember you leaving with him." Your heart starts to feel like it's sinking, "It's funny, really, but that night he ended up dead. Slaughtered in his own hotel room. No one heard anything. No one saw anything. But you were the last one with him."

You weigh your options for a brief moment, and then you rip your arm from his grasp. Before he can register your actions you push him forward and drop your elbow into the back of his head, knocking him unconscious. "I've got a problem," You announce as two of Klaue's thugs look in your direction.

"Me too," Okoye responds in Xhosa, "I've been made."

The first man pulls his gun and you leap forward, shoving the barrel toward the ground as you throw your head into his. His head bounces back and hits the wall and he slumps to the ground. You spin on the spot, kicking the other one in the face before he crashes over the side of the balcony. You pick up the first one's dropped gun, clutching it in your hand before you dive off of the balcony, landing smoothly next to T'Challa. Upstairs Okoye tosses one of the men off the balcony and he crashes down onto one of the tables behind Klaue. Everyone scatters and then Klaue spots T'Challa and pulls his gun.

"So much for subtlety," T'Challa frowns, flipping the table on it's edge to block the gunfire that erupts throughout the room. Around you the crowds begin to run for the exits. The man crouched behind the table with you and T'Challa glances at you once and then does a double take. You look at him blankly, and then you recall T'Challa's words: an old friend from the CIA. You had been made. Shit. You turn back to T'Challa just in time to see him nod and then leap from the table into the gunfire. You take a breath and launch yourself over the table as well, landing on the shoulders of one of Klaue's men. You grab his head and break his neck easily between your palms; as he crumples you keep your momentum going, kicking another guard in the face and then grab the gun from his hands; you put the muzzle up against his head and fire and then take out the man behind him.

You've only just noticed T'Challa's absence when he crashes down behind you. Seeing that Okoye and Nakia are going after Klaue you pause, helping the King to his feet. "You alright?"

"Fine, let's go," T'Challa responds, "I will never hear the end of it if I don't catch up soon." Together you sprint out of the casino, "Shuri!"

There's a shuffling over the comm and then you hear her voice, "Yes yes yes!" She cries in excitement, "Wait… Which side of the road is it?"

"For bast sake just drive!" T'Challa sounds exasperated, "Regretting those shoes?" He asks as your feet pound the pavement next to him.

"You're going to question my fashion choices now?"A small smile lifts your lips, you couldn't remember the last time you had all out ran like this. It felt good. The night air felt good. You felt _alive_. From the corner of your eye you see the Panther suit forming around him. Behind you an engine revs loudly.

"That's Shuri," T'Challa tells you.

"Is she going to stop?"

"Not quite," He responds almost jovially. You both jump at the same time, he digs in with his claws, and you land on the roof of the car. You scramble for purchase before pulling your knife from its holster on your thigh and stabbing it into the metal.

"Woo!" Shuri cries in your ear, "Let's go!"

"There they are," You gesture towards the chase up ahead of you with your free hand. The cars split up.

"We'll take the right," Nakia tells you.

"We'll take the other two!" Shuri says, darting left; you grip the handle of your knife tighter with a grimace. "I see a shortcut."

"Try to remember we're on top of here, ey?" You remind her.

"No promises," She responds, making a quick right down a steep hill. The lead SUV blows through a light and collides with an oncoming vehicle.

"We're not going to make it!"

"Keep going," T'Challa encourages her.

"Oh shit," You watch as he reaches down, using his claws to make a sharp turn to avoid the wreck. You lose your tenuous balance and slide across the roof of the car, your grip on your knife the only thing keeping you from tumbling into traffic. Ignoring Shuri's cry of celebration you hook one heeled foot into the open window and boost yourself back up. You sit up and immediately are forced to duck back down as gunfire erupts around you.

T'Challa jumps from the hood of the car onto the roof of the SUV in front of you, ripping the top of the car off. The driver leaps out of the car and the SUV slams into the cars parked on the side of the road. The car beneath you bucks as the Lexus' tires mow over the driver.

"Hey, what was that?" Shuri exclaims.

"Don't worry about it," T'Challa responds, landing in front of you, "You're doing great." Up ahead two more SUVs approach a bridge, as you approach you're forced to duck behind T'Challa to avoid the gunfire.

"I could really use one of those suits right about now," You tell him, "Even my kevlar suit would do the trick."

"Maybe next time," T'Challa responds.

"Hey, look at your suit!" Shuri exclaims, "You've been taking bullets and charging it up with kinetic energy."

You glance at the glowing glyphs on T'Challa's suit confused, "Pull around the truck," he tells her.

The Lexus accelerates ahead pulling up towards the SUV when the truck passes by; T'Challa leaps to the trailer and then out of sight.

"Show off," You tell Shuri lightly. A moment later both SUVs crash and flip down the bridge. Shuri swerves, catching T'Challa on the hood of the car once more.

"She's right," Shuri tells him, "You do show off."

"Will you just drive?" T'Challa asks, "Faster Shuri!"

"I'm going as fast as I can!" You fight to keep your balance as the car beneath you weaves through traffic, making erratic turns at a breakneck speed. You watch as Klaue hangs out of the window of the SUV, some kind of weapon in his hands. He fires and instantly the car starts to disintegrate around you.

"Oh fuck," You take a deep breath and jump to the top of a truck near you, you can see T'Challa running along the side of a nearby building, still following Klaue's SUV. You hop down to the road, taking off in his direction. When you arrive T'Challa has Klaue by the throat, holding him against the SUV.

"Oh mercy! King, mercy!" Klaue cries out as T'Challa's claws slide out of the suit with a menacing metal on metal sound.

"Every breath you take is mercy from me," T'Challa growls. A car approaches and Okoye and Nakia climb out. Nakia says something in Xhosa and T'Challa pauses.

"Come on guys," The man from the CIA climbs out of the car, "Let's go, huh?"

Looking around at the crowd surrounding the scene T'Challa finally nods, "(Y/n), I will see you back in Wakanda," he tells you, glancing from you to the CIA guy pointedly.

"Nuh uh," He says, "You too girlie. We all need to talk."


	26. Chapter 26

You stand against the wall, eyeing the nervous looking CIA agent who has his gun trained on you. You wondered what they had told him about you to put that look on his face. Maybe that you had the strength of Steve Rogers without the same computations regarding morality? Either way you were in a tough spot. Aside from a miracle, you were going to have to force T'Challa to leave you behind; you couldn't have the leader of a foreign country help you escape from the United States government. Your eyes flicker away from the agent to the one way glass as Klaue calls out, "Hello! I can see you!".

Ross turns away from the glass to look at T'Challa, "So this is a big mess huh? I figured we can go good cop bad cop," You snort at that and his eyes shift to you.

"Something about that funny (Y/l/n)? I don't think if I was in your position I would be laughing." T'Challa gives you a barely perceptible shake of his head and you shrug.

"Nope, nothing funny at all," You relax back against the wall and slowly cross your arms over your chest, keeping your movements as obvious as possible before your guard gets too jumpy and puts a bullet in your brain. Even you couldn't come back from that. Ross stares at you for a few seconds more before he turns back to T'Challa.

"Anyways, I'll talk to him first, then you guys go in-" Okoye barks something in Xhosa to T'Challa and he responds quickly. You wished you knew what they were saying, all you could make out was Klaue's name. Ross watches them nervously, apparently wishing the same thing.

"After your questioning we will take him back to Wakanda with us," T'Challa says firmly.

Ross just stares at him for a moment before recovering, "What? No. Look, I like you. A lot. But he's in my custody now. He's not going anywhere," Ross pauses looking around the room, "Listen, I'm doing you a favor by letting you even be in here." He reaches forward to touch T'Challa's shoulder and Okoye steps forward, speaking sharply in Xhosa. You can hear the threat behind her foreign words and apparently so can Ross as he drops his hand quickly. "Does she speak English?"

"When she wants to," Okoye says archly and your lips pull up in a smile. Ross stares at her for a moment and then pulls himself together, "I'm going in. And when I'm done, you guys are up."

"Agent Ross," T'Challa calls.

"Yeah?"

T'Challa sets his hand on his shoulder, "I do appreciate your help in Busan."

Seemingly placated, Ross smiles. "You see that? It's called diplomacy. You're welcome." With that Ross walks through the door, closing it behind him.

You try to think of a way to communicate with T'Challa without the guards hearing, but nothing comes to mind. You make a mental note to make an attempt to pick up the language if you manage to get back to Wakanda.

"I had no idea the United States' government would be involved," T'Challa tells you, pointedly ignoring your guard, "For this I am sorry. I had no intention of putting you in danger this way."

"It's not your fault," You tell him.

"I will get you out of here."

Your jaw clenches, "No you will not," You tell him firmly. He starts to interrupt you and you cut him off, "You think Ross is just going to let me walk out of here? It's a miracle I'm not already locked up somewhere. If you try you might be starting something way bigger than all this. And you won't, not over me." You drop your voice to the point where the agent can't hear, counting on T'Challa's hearing being similarly enhanced, "We don't need anyone sniffing around in Wakanda. Not while he's there. You promised to protect him."

"Okay, that's enough," The agent snaps, "Please step away from the prisoner."

T'Challa turns back to the glass after giving you a doubtful look. You remind yourself that you had been pulling your punches when the two of you had fought; he really didn't know what you were capable of. But where to go when you made your inevitable escape? You couldn't risk leading anyone back to Wakanda. In fact, it had to be known that you were nowhere near the African nation, lest anyone got there looking for you. That meant making some kind of very public appearance, maybe in Eastern Europe?

Your scheming is interrupted as Ross pushes the door back open, eyes focused on T'Challa.

"Your father told the UN that Klaue stole all the vibranium you had," Ross says after a moment. "But now he's telling me you have more?"

"And you believe the word of an arms dealer, strapped to a chair?" T'Challa asks, but the line is too well delivered and Ross doesn't bite.

"How much more are you hiding?"

Behind you the door slams open, and you turn instantaneously your body naturally shifting into a crouch as you prepare to attack. A half a second later the CIA agents draw their weapons. You relax slightly as you recognize Nakia, but her sharp words in Xhosa to T'Challa and Okoye keeps you on edge. A second later an explosion rocks the building from the interrogation room. You manage a half step in the direction of the door when the one-way glass explodes out towards you.

The agent covering you stands frozen so you grab the barrel of the gun in one hand, pushing it away from you, and the collar of his shirt in the other. You pull him down with you as you flatten yourself to the ground; bullets whiz past your head and you grit your teeth against the roar of the automatic weapon.

Your eyes catch movement and your mouth falls open as a grenade tumbles into the shattered window landing a few feet from your face. Knowing it was useless but unable to stop yourself you scramble backwards, trying to put distance between yourself and the live bomb as you can. You watch in shock as T'Challa dives on top of the grenade, taking the impact of the explosion into his suit.

The relief that floods your system is quickly overpowered by shame; T'Challa's self-sacrifice wasn't something that had even crossed your mind. Whatever the leader possessed; the same thing that Steve Rogers had that led him to become Captain America, was unmistakingly missing from you. HYDRA had often lauded your unerring instincts for self-preservation but you now realized that it wasn't an asset, but a weakness. Even grabbing your guard hadn't been an action of heroism, but a combination of fear that he would fire at you in his panic and the proximity of him to you.

You swallow back the revulsion that your train of thought carries and force yourself to focus on the situation at hand. Suit glowing T'Challa hops to his feet and runs in the direction of the explosion. You start to follow when the barrel of a gun catches your eye; your immediate instinct is to take out the threat but you force yourself to stand down, raising your hands in front of you as the CIA agent stares you down.

"Right," You tell him, "Not going anywhere."

"Don't fucking move," His voice is shaking and you nod, glancing behind you. Nakia and several agents hover above Ross who lies on the floor, bleeding out from a gunshot wound to the back despite an agent's attempt to apply pressure to the wound. A few tense minutes later Okoye and T'Challa come back in, their eyes surveying the damage.

"He just jumped in front of me," Nakia murmurs, sounding shaken, "I don't think he'll make it here, it hit his spine."

"Give me a Kimoyo bead," T'Challa says, and you watch curiously as he takes the bead from Nakia's bracelet and inserts it into Ross' wound. "This will stabilize him for now. Give him to us," He tells the agents, "We can save him."

The moment the ship is in the air you round on T'Challa, fists clenched. "I was going to let myself be captured to avoid the CIA ending up in Wakanda and now you're voluntarily going to bring _him_ there?" You take a deep breath, attempting to control your temper. Your next words come out more even, "Just think about this T'Challa."

"She's right," Okoye speaks up, "Our mission was to bring back Klaue. We failed. This man is a foreign intelligence operative. How do we justify bringing him into our borders?"

"He took a bullet for me," Nakia reminds her.

"That was his choice," Okoye says harshly.

"So now we are just supposed to let him die?" Nakia asks.

"Let us consider that we heal him," Okoye offers, "It is his duty to report back to his country. And as King, it is your duty to protect ours."

"You'd be putting everyone at risk," You jump on Okoye's words, though you don't picture the people of Wakanda when you speak, only your frozen partner, completely defenseless.

"Who asked you for your opinion?" Nakia snaps. "This woman only cares for her boyfriend, and nothing of Wakanda!"

"Enough," T'Challa says firmly, "I am well aware of my duties, General. I cannot just let him die knowing we can save him." He turns to you, "However I will do all I can to protect you and your friend."

"I know you will," Your voice hardens, "But if Ross pokes around and finds him, I'll kill him myself."

You follow behind the stretcher as Shuri leads you into the lab.

"Great," Shuri tells T'Challa, "Another broken white boy for us to fix," She shoots you a wink, "This is going to be fun." You stand back as Shuri begins to work on Ross, you had been hoping he wouldn't make it this far and when Shuri finally takes a step back and says, "He will live," you let out a soft sigh and head towards the exit, ignoring the eyes on you.


	27. Chapter 27

You awoke with a start, your blanket tangled around your body as you fight to get into a sitting position. Taking a few shaky breaths you wipe the sweat from your face with the back of your hand and climb to your feet. Another nightmare. You wondered if they would ever stop. It was early, just before dawn but you pull on your combat gear anyway; you needed to do something to shake the dream from the forefront of your mind. You head down to a nearby forest where you could be alone to train.

It's late afternoon when you finally stop, exhausted and hungry. As you approach your home Shuri darts out of it, her face uncharacteristically serious.

"There you are!" She chides, "Something's happened. I don't have time to explain and I'm not exactly sure myself so don't ask. I need you to keep an eye on Ross for me."

"Is everything okay?" You ask as you fall into a light jog behind her, your earlier hunger forgotten.

"I think so," She replies slowly before shaking her head as if to clear a thought. You don't ask anything else. Outside T'Challa's office she stops, "I have to go-Don't let him wander and don't kill him!"

You can hear Ross' voice from a shut door on the other side of the room, "Hello? You can't just lock me in here! I am an American citizen-" You wrench the door open and he falls silent for a moment before he clears his throat. "You here to kill me?"

"Not at the moment," You give him a wry smile and close the door behind you, "I'm here to babysit."

"So what, you're the Wakandan's lapdog in return for asylum?"

"Not quite, just helping out," You tell him, "I think of it more as a vacation."

"In Wakanda?"

"I don't like the ocean," You sit on the edge of the desk and fold your hands into your lap. Ross walks around the room, examining the various artifacts with a passive interest.

"Why help the Avengers?" He asks suddenly, "I mean, you could've gone underground. Stayed off the radar indefinitely and lived out the rest of your life in peace. Instead you thrust yourself into the spotlight. Seems unnecessarily risky."

You hesitate for a moment and then answer as honestly as you can, "I like Steve Rogers."

"And I don't suppose you know where he is?"

Your answering smile is answer enough, Ross nods and turns away, facing a line of masks on the wall.

Another hour passes and you find yourself pacing around the room, nerves on edge.

"Can you stop?" Ross asks wearily, "You're making me nervous." You shoot him a dirty look, but sit back down on the desk, only to spring right back up as you hear footsteps outside the room. You naturally position yourself between Ross and the door, your body tense; the door unlocks and Nakia stands in the doorway, several thick blankets in her arms. Her face is distraught.

"What's going on?" You demand, "Is-"

"The King is dead," Nakia tells you, tossing one of the blankets to you and the other to Ross, "Come with me unless you want to join him."

Your fingers dig into the bundle in your hands as you process the information. "Wait, what? I'm going to need more than that-"

"You don't get more than that!" Nakia snaps, "You come with me or you take your chances. That's all you need to know."

You meet her angry gaze with a passive one of your own, internally weighing the situation before you wrap yourself in the blanket, pulling it up over your head like a hood to block out your face. Satisfied, Nakia leads you into the night. Several times you attempt to ask questions and each time she shushes you and leads you further from the city.

Your ears catch Shuri's voice in the distance, and then the three of you emerge from the trees. Shuri sits with her mother, both disguised with similar blankets. Ramonda glances at you with her typical disdain-she disagreed with the decision of allowing you to remain in Wakanda and therefore treated you the same way someone who disliked dogs would treat a friend's pet-before her eyes moved over to Ross.

"Nakia. Who is this man?"

"He's a friend of T'Challa's. He saved my life," Nakia tells her.

"Where is Okoye?"

"Okoye is not coming. She and Dora Milaje will serve the new king."

That does it. "Wait, what? New king? What the hell is going on?"

"Quiet, outsider," Nakia replies, "Wait here." You watch amazed as she disappears back into the foliage. Not many people had the guts to speak to you that way. You weren't a fan.

Ignoring Ross and Ramonda you drop to your knees in front of Shuri and take her hands in yours. "Shuri what's going on? What happened? Is your brother really…" You swallow harshly as she nods.

"There was a challenger...An outsider, but a Wakandan. He killed my brother. That makes him king. By now he'll have consumed the herb and have the power of the Black Panther."

"Okay," You rise up, "I'll take care of him."

"You can't!" Shuri stands as well.

"Don't worry about me Shur, political assassinations are kind of my thing. He won't even see me coming."

"It's not that," Shuri shakes her head, "He won the throne fair and square. You would be assassinating the King of Wakanda. The Dora Milaje will fight you. You will be an enemy of Wakanda, no matter who takes the throne."

"What's one more country?" You wave your hand dismissively, "I can take care of this."

"Not yet," Ramonda interrupts, her voice calm, "We will wait and we will see."

You purse your lips as you consider the woman before you. "Your friend will be safe if that's what you're worried about," Shuri interjects, too quietly for Ross to hear. "For awhile at least."

"And if he's discovered?"

"Then I don't think there's a thing anyone could do to stop you from killing whoever's in your way," Shuri says, her normally bright tone dulled as she peers at you from beneath the blanket. You consider for a moment and then nod.

"I trust you," You say simply, lowering yourself to the ground and leaning against the tree behind you as you wait for Nakia to return. A short time later, Nakia emerges from the bushes once more, a package cradled in her arms. After a short conversation in Xhosa with Shuri and Ramonda she turns to you. "Come, we must leave this place."

Your eyes narrow as you look up at her, "Listen, I don't know what kind of lackeys you're used to dealing with, but that's not going to work with me. What is that? Where are we going? No offense sis, but I'm not going anywhere with you until you tell me exactly what the plan is."

"I'm not your sister," Nakia snaps, "And I do not answer to-"

"Nakia," Ramonda snaps, surprising you, "If you were in her position you would want the same information." She says something in Xhosa and Nakia nods, taking a breath.

"Apologies outsider," Nakia says, not sounding sorry at all, "But we do need to be moving. I'll explain on the way."


	28. Chapter 28

You wrap your blanket tighter around yourself as the harsh wind whips against your exposed skin. Having been trailing behind, using your enhanced senses to make sure no one followed you, all the while growing more irritated at the lack of information that had been given to you, despite Nakia's promise to explain. You increase your pace slightly, quickly catching up with the group.

"Okay, we're moving; time to explain this plan of yours."

Nakia's lips purse, but she nods reluctantly. "We're taking the Heart Shaped Herb to Jabariland."

Your jaw clenches as she turns her eyes back to the path ahead of you, apparently feeling as though she had imparted all relevant information. You take a deep breath to settle your anger before you open your mouth again, but Ross beats you to it.

"Heart Shaped Herb? What is that?"

"It gives whoever takes it heightened abilities," Shuri explains.

"It's what made T'Challa so strong," Nakia adds. Ramonda stops in her tracks, her expression suddenly nervous.

"Nakia, I don't like this," She tells the younger woman, "The Herb belongs to us. We may be creating a bigger monster with M'Baku."

"M'Baku? The big guy who challenged T'Challa before?"

Ramonda nods, "Nakia, you should take it yourself."

"I'm a spy with no army," Nakia argues, "I wouldn't stand a chance."

Ramonda appears to think it over for a moment before she nods, "We'll go."

As you start forward again, Ross falls into step beside you. "So, what would happen if you took this herb thing?"

"It would make it even easier for me to kill you?" You offer, irritated.

"The Herb is not for outsiders," Nakia snaps, "It belongs to the people of Wakanda. Not to blood-thirsty criminals who seek asylum in it's boundaries."

You weren't even conscious of having moved until your hand gripped Nakia's shoulder, spinning her around to face you. "What the hell is your problem? If I wanted your god damned Herb all four of you would be dead and I would have it."

"I have no doubt," Nakia replies coldly, "And that's my problem. All of the people out there, our people, people who need help, and T'Challa gives _you_ sanctuary?"

"I didn't ask-"

"A ruthless killer," Nakia continues, and you press your nails into your palms to battle the tension that was filling you, "A woman who would sacrifice countless lives just to protect another monster-"

"Nakia!" Ramonda cries out and you suddenly look around, noticing what your senses had been responding to; you were surrounded by the Jabari army.

Nakia immediately raises her hands and barks out "Stay calm," To the rest of you. Ignoring your instincts you follow passively as the guards lead you into Jabriland. When you reach the throne room you're once again impressed by the size of the man who sits on the throne; you had only seen him from a distance when he had challenged T'Challa. He doesn't say a word as he accesses the group; his eyes stray from Nadia, to Ramonda, to Shiri and then he pauses, glowering at Ross for a moment before he meets your steady gaze. After a moment he turns back to Ramonda, who takes this as a cue to speak.

"My son was murdered in ritual combat," She says simply.

"Were the odds fair?" M'Baku responds, his voice booming.

"Yes," Nadia says, "But-"

"So it was less a murder than a defeat?" M'Baku interrupts, sounding almost pleased.

"Do not rub out noses in it-" Shuri begins, but M'Baku quickly cuts her off.

"Silence! I make the pronouncements here, girl."

"Look, uh, your highness," Ross says, ignoring the look you shoot him, "The new king is a-"

To your surprise M'Baku begins to bark loudly, drowning out Ross' voice; the rest of the nearby Jabarri join in.

"You cannot talk," M'Baku tells him, "One more word and I feed you to my children." Ross swallows nervously, but you catch the wink M'Baku throws in Ramonda's direction. "I'm kidding," he continues suddenly, "We are vegetarians."

Apparently tired of the small-talk, Nadia steps forward and pulls out the Heart Shaped Herb. "Great Gorilla M'Baku, this is why we are here. To offer this to you. An outsider sits on our throne. Only you can help us stop him."

You watch as M'Baku appears to consider the offer, looking pleased at the turn of events. Finally he rises to his feet, "Come with me," He commands.

He leads you out of the palace and back into the snow, behind you Ross grumbles quietly about the temperature. You ignore his words, but pull your blanket tighter around your body. He stops in front of a small hut where a small group of Jabari work as healers. You glance in and stop in surprise.

"Impossible," Nakia gasps, "Is he breathing?"

"He is in a coma," M'Baku replies, "Barely clinging to life."

"Why do you have him in the snow?" Shuri demands.

"It is the only thing keeping him from joining the ancestors," M'Baku tells her grimly.

"We need to get him to my lab!" She exclaims, "I can heal him there."

"Take him," M'Baku shrugs, "He'll be dead in seconds."

"Nakia," Ramonda says suddenly, "The Herb." She takes it from her hands and pushes past M'Baku. "I call upon the ancestors. I call upon Bast. I am here with my son, T'Challa. Heal him."

You look on as Ramonda prepares the ritual. "Sit, please," Ramonda tells you, settling down next to her son. You glance at Ross and then take the seat next to him. Ramonda pours the solution from the Herb down her son's throat, praying in Xhosa as she does it, before covering his body with handfuls of the powdery snow. She says something in Xhosa, which Nakia then echoes. Nakia nods towards Ross who repeats the unfamiliar phrase. When she looks at you you let the words fall from your lips obediently.

When Shuri repeats the prayer it's over and you hear Nakia's soft words over the howling of the wind: "Wake up T'Challa, wake up."

A few tense minutes pass and you begin to grow restless. "What do we do if he doesn't wake up?" Nakia shoots you a glare, but Ramonda waves her off.

"No, she is right. We must accept that the Herb may not be strong enough to wake him," Ramonda sighs, "If T'Challa does not wake, you will kill the new King. But you must consider the consequences."

"Hah!" M'Baku barks suddenly, "You expect that this child will succeed against the challenger, even though he has consumed the Heart Shaped Herb? Even though T'Challa could not?"

"I'm not a child," You reply cooly, "And it won't be an issue."

You huddle under the blanket, settling in against the side of the hut. T'Challa showed no signs of waking, but no one showed any sign of wanting to leave, despite the frigid temperature.

You let your eyes flutter closed for a moment, until a familiar voice jerks you back to consciousness: "Do you have a blanket?"

You open your eyes to see T'Challa embracing Ramonda, Nakia and Shuri as Ross and M'Baku look on. As they step away he catches your eye and you give him a wry smile, "Your majesty."

After a restless night you once again find yourself in the throne room as your companions begin to plan. "Killmonger has the full support of our military," Nakia says, "And he burned the garden of the Heart Shaped Herb."

"Of course he did," Ross says as you glance over at him in surprise. You hadn't expected him to have much to add to the conversation, of worth, at least. "That's what he was trained to do. His unit used to work with the CIA to destabilize foreign countries. They would always strike at transitions of power, like an election year or the death of a monarch. You get control of the government, the military-"

"Our resources," T'Challa cuts in, "The Great Mound."

"Our vibranium," Shuri adds, "All of my designs."

"He will send our weapons all over the world," T'Challa continues, turning to Nakia he gestures to his mother and sister, "You must get them out of Wakanda safely."

"What?" Ramonda's eyes widen.

"What about you?" Shuri demands.

"The challenge will have to continue."

"T'Challa, we will not leave Wakanda," Ramonda tells him firmly.

It doesn't faze T'Challa. "It is my duty to keep you safe."

"If he gets control of our technology nowhere will be safe," Shuri argues, pulling the Black Panther necklace from her pocket and placing it around her brother's neck. "The Black Panther lives. And when he fights for the fate of Wakanda I will be right beside him."

"As will I," Nakia declares.

"I'm in too," You raise your eyebrows at Ross' declaration. "What? You're gonna need all the help you can get."

"Are you done?" M'Baku asks suddenly, his tone told. T'Challa meets his eyes for a moment before looking at all of you.

"Could you give me and Lord M'Baku a moment?" You give them both a nod as you exit. The others wander down the hall but you hang outside, listening to the conversation. When it finishes and T'Challa exits, he lets out a sign as he sees you.

"Do you think he'll come around?" You ask, falling into step beside him.

"I hope so," T'Challa replies grimly, "And you, will you risk your life to defend Wakanda, (Y/n)?"

You give him your coldest smile, "Killmonger doesn't stand a chance."


	29. Chapter 29

You stand off to the side, stretching lightly as the Wakandan's begin planning their attack in earnest. "(Y/n)," You look up at the sound of your name and hop back up to your feet. "Can I speak to you for a moment?"

Curious, you follow T'Challa a handful of feet away from the group. "What's up? We moving out?"

"In a minute," T'Challa says, "I want you to stay with Ross on this one. Take the defense."

"Seriously?" You ask, dumbfounded, "That's ridiculous. Between the two of us-"

T'Challa holds up a hand, stopping you. "Listen, please. I have three reasons for this decision. One, if the opportunity arises in which you would need to defend Ross, perhaps he would be willing to forget your presence here in Wakanda. Two, Killmonger doesn't know who you are, or about Barnes at this point. If things were to end badly, you could still take the opportunity to take Barnes and get out of here." Seeing your expression he smiles, "Please don't interrupt. I know these reasons don't mean much to you. Your loyalty in this regard reminds me of Steve Rogers. So let this last reason subdue you: This is a battle for Wakanda. I know you're willing to lay down your life, but I think you'll understand this: This is a battle I need to fight on my own. Killmonger is mine."

You lick your lips slowly, considering this. "I do understand," You say finally, "But I'm not going to abandon you. If you need me, I'll be there. Otherwise," You roll your eyes, "I'll babysit."

A group of Border Tribesman run by and you duck behind the wall until they pass. Nakia led your group, moving silently in the front, followed by you, then Ross, then Shuri. As you start moving again, you can hear Shuri quietly rushing Ross along behind you.

After a couple of tense minutes you reach the ramp leading to Shuri's lab. Under cover, you let the blanket you kept wrapped around you fall to the ground. You were thankful you had been wearing your tactical suit when Shuri had come to get you, so you were ready for a fight. Unfortunately your gear which hadn't been patched up since after the Ultron Fight was looking a lot worse for the wear. Threadbare in some places, you knew it wouldn't stop any kind of projectile, let alone a bullet. Also in the unfortunate column was the fact that you had only been training, and not gearing up for a fight. Your weapon inventory was limited to your combat knife and a single pistol with a handful of rounds.

You pull the pistol out of its holster and eject the clip, counting the exact number. Four. Great. Beside you one of Shuri's tables rise and she grabs something off of it. "Nakia and I will get control of the Royal Talon with this."

"Ok, so what do I do?" Ross asks.

Shuri grabs his wrist, slipping a bracelet over his hand, "You will have to fly it."

"What?" Ross asks, looking a little nauseous.

"You were a great pilot-don't worry, I'll guide you through it."

"Why can't _she_ do it?" Ross gestures weakly back to you and you roll your eyes.

"Because someone's got to watch your back," You tell him, nodding to the gun clenched in your hand. Apparently it doesn't make him feel any better because he grabs onto the edge of the table. Without any further instruction, Nakia and Shuri head towards the ramp.

"Good luck Agent Ross!" Shuri calls behind her.

"Yeah, I don't know what I'm doing-" Ross starts, but Nakia quickly cuts him off with a quick "We're counting on you!" Ross turns on you immediately. "What do I do now?"

"Wait," You say curtly, leaning casually against the doorway; your enhanced hearing would give you a heads up on any intruders long before they were a threat. Your blasé attitude didn't appear to bring him any solace as he starts pacing almost immediately.

Without warning the sand table drops to the ground and what looks like an F-16 cockpit appears in its place, and a voice calls out, "Remote piloting system activated."

"I made it American style for you," Shuri calls over the comms, "Get in!" Ross glances at you and you nod towards the cockpit impatiently. Still unsure he climbs in and starts it up. You watch from the window as the RTF takes off, knocking back two King's Guard pilots in the process. Both Shuri and Nakia cheer over the comms. "Go!" Shuri shouts, "We can't let those weapons get beyond Wakanda."

"Alright," Ross says more confidently, "I'm on it. (Y/l/n) you got my back?"

"Yup," You grunt, sliding down the wall and resting the gun on your knees. You felt entirely useless in this situation and found yourself wishing that someone would attack just so you would have something to do. Inactivity did not suit you whatsoever.

"Ok Shuri," Ross says after a moment, "I got them. What do I do?"

"Shoot them down genius!" Shuri responds exasperated.

"Alright…" You watch as Ross places his hands on the firing mechanism, a faint tremor running through them, "Here goes nothing." You hear the blast just before Ross grins, "Alright, I got them-Oh shit, shit, shit!"

"What?" You hop to your feet, "What's happening?"

"I'm being fired on," Ross replies, sounding preoccupied, now controlling the RTF like a professional, "Shuri, I've lost one of them but two are on my tail."

You're about to sit back down when a shudder rocks the building. Your lips curl into a smile as you see the sight outside; the missing ship was hovering outside of the window of the lab shooting at the window.

"What the hell was that?" Ross shouts.

"We're under attack. Don't worry about it!" You run off, heading in the direction of the roof. You savor the feeling as you sprint towards the edge of the roof; this is where you felt most alive, running on pure adrenaline and instinct. With an exhilarated smile you dive off the roof, the wind beating against your face and land neatly atop the attacking ship. You slide down onto the windshield, gripping the metal seam with one hand while you use the other to bring the butt of your gun down onto the glass with all of your strength. Spider web cracks appear, but the glass holds.

The men inside watch with surprised expressions and then they begin evasive maneuvers: your fingers lose their grip as the ship rears back; your gun tumbles to the ground as you scramble for purchase on the smooth metal of the underside of the vehicle. For one heartstopping second you don't think you'll find your grip, and then your fingertips tuck into a seam in the ship's paneling. You kick your legs up and begin crawling back towards the glass windshield. Taking a deep breath and steadying yourself you brace your legs against the front of the ship and then push off, flinging yourself into the air above the windshield; this was it, if the glass held you'd probably be sent spiraling to your death. You let out a cry of triumph as your feet punch through the compromised glass and you land in the cockpit.

"Hello boys," You smile wickedly, "Are we going to do this the easy way, or the hard way?" The soldier to your left pulls out a curved sword and you jump into motion. You drive the ball of your palm into the underside of the man's chin, grabbing the sword as he crumples back into his seat and a half a second later the end of the sword finds its home in the other man's throat, a spray of blood coating your face. Alarms begin to sound around you as the ship begins to lose altitude; taking advantage of its proximity to the building you quickly kick out the rest of the glass and then take two steps, launching yourself through the empty windshield and through the glass of Shuri's lab.

Ross jumps to his feet as you skid to a stop amongst the shards of broken glass. Outside the ship hits the ground with a loud screech of metal, rocking the building once more. "I think our position's probably been made. We should move."

"Right," Ross agrees, and the two of you run up the ramp.

"Ross," T'Challa holds out his hand and Ross shakes it, "Thank you for your assistance. You are a good man. Better than most."

"Well you saved my life," Ross reminds him.

"Then we are even," T'Challa tells him, "But I must risk becoming indebted to you. It will soon be time to reveal what Wakanda has to offer to the world, but we would like to do it on our own terms."

Ross appears to think it over, "I don't know what you're talking about," He says finally, "Wakanda's just a small farming nation, right? And definitely not hiding any criminals," He adds, glancing over at you.

T'Challa smiles, "Right. No criminals here. Just friends."


	30. Chapter 30

The beads around your wrist let out a little chime and you quickly flip one into your hand. A little holographic image of Shuri appears, a wide smile on her face. "Good morning," She greets you, "How are you doing on this wonderful morning?"

"I'm okay," You narrow your eyes, "What's going on?"

"Nothing much," Shuri smiles, "Just hanging out in my lab."

"...Okay?" You frown, confused, "So did you want something?"

"Mmm," Shuri hums thoughtfully, "There was something… Having trouble remembering…"

"Shuri!" You laugh, "Come on. I'm training!"

"I know," Shuri says grimly, "The children are terrified of you."

"I'm hanging up now," You warn her.

"Oh, you know," Shuri says, "I think I just remembered what I needed to tell you after all," You stare expectantly, "He's awake."

You almost drop the bead in your hand, "Shuri!" You scold, "You should have led with that!"

"See you soon!" She grins, and the hologram disappears.

You force yourself to walk slowly to the lab, calming the beating of your heart. You weren't sure where the surge of nervous excitement had come from; maybe just because of the build up of anticipation.

The door slides open automatically as you enter and you see him before he sees you. He's sitting on the bed, facing away from you as Shuri checks him over. As your footsteps echo through the room his head turns, his icy blue eyes meeting yours.

"Hey," You raise your hand in greeting, "Welcome back." You pause in your approach, "You know who I am right?" Shuri had warned you since his memory of you was so closely intertwined with both HYDRA and the programming that there was a chance that his memories of you could be affected.

"I remember everything," Bucky climbs to his feet as Shuri steps away and stretches.

"Good," You nod, feeling uncomfortable all of a sudden, "And the programming?"

"Gone," Bucky's eyes crinkle as he smiles, "My mind is all mine again." You freeze for a second upon seeing him really smile for the first time a sense of unease replacing the feelings of nervous excitement.

"Congrats," You play with the beads on your wrist absentmindedly. It's starting to dawn on you that you may have made a mistake here; it had been a long time since the two of you had been partners. You were holding onto something that didn't exist anymore. Someone who didn't exist anymore. "Steve will be glad to hear you're awake."

They're both staring at your expressionless face with slightly confused expressions. "Well you're all set here. I'll want to see you back in a few days just to make sure there's no complications," Shuri tells him, "(Y/n), why don't you show your old friend around? I'm sure he'd like to get some fresh air."

"That's an understatement," He tells her, "And thank you. Again."

"It was my pleasure," Shuri assures him, "Now go on, I'm sure you have a lot to catch up on."

Bucky falls into pace beside you as you leave the lab. "Can't tell you how good it feels to be rid of HYDRA once and for all," He says as you walk.

"I can't even imagine," You respond absentmindedly as you quickly become absorbed in your own negative thoughts.

"Have you heard from Steve?"

"A couple of times. He stays busy." It takes you a few seconds before you realize he's stopped walking and you turn around to face him confused.

"What?"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing?" You furrow your brow, "Why?"

"You're a terrible liar," He crosses his arms.

"I'm a great liar," You scoff in response.

He chuckles at that, "Okay, yeah. But not to me." Once again you're stunned at the ease at which the pleasant sound escapes his lips.

"How do you know? We don't even know each other. Not really," You had meant to sound firm and reasonable but you sound weak and unsure even to your own ears.

He stares at you for a moment, lips parted slightly in surprise before he shakes his head. "That's just stupid doll." You open your mouth to protest and he raises one hand to stop you, "In the past fifty years I've had exactly one person that I could trust. One person who always had my back. One person to keep me _sane_. And what? You think just 'cause I remembered who I was before or because we're not with HYDRA anymore that that's just going to go away?"

"I don't know," You admit, frowning, "I'm not used to feeling unsure."

"I guess there's a first time for everything," He smiles again. You can't help but smile in response, bumping your shoulder with his.

"You know," You resume walking, "I always wondered who you were before Hydra, but I never made you as the King of Morality's bestie."

"Well Stevie wasn't always the badass you see today," Bucky reminds you, "Back then _someone_ had to back up his morality."

"Right," You smile at that, "Makes sense. This is my place."

"I can't believe you stayed," Bucky shakes his head, "Anything interesting happen?"

"Nah," You lean against the wall, "It was quiet."

"Must have driven you crazy. So what now?" Bucky asks, "We call Steve? Go on the run with him?"

"We could…" You respond slowly, weighing the words in your head, "Or we could stay here." Bucky raises his eyebrows, "Not indefinitely," You quickly backtrack, "Just for awhile. Take it easy. I've actually had time to stop and breathe here, and I gotta say it felt _good_. If Steve needs us he'll call. And trust me, at some point he will. I can't seem to shake him."

"Taking it easy," Bucky muses, "Gotta say I like the sound of that doll."


	31. Chapter 31

Almost a month had gone by since Bucky had awoken and the two of you had fallen into a steady routine, something you had never really had in your life until now. Bucky was sharing your hut with you. You had thought it would be weird, having someone stay with you but you quickly fell into the same familiarity you had felt when staying together on missions.

"You're still taking it easy on me," Bucky huffs as he sits down at the kitchen table. His hair had fallen loose during your spar and he struggles to pull it back up with one hand.

You pluck the tie from beneath his fingers and settle in behind him, running your fingers through his hair to remove the tangles. He wasn't wrong, although still formidable in a fight and perfectly able to defend himself in hand to hand combat you had a definite advantage. "Well, it's not a fair fight," You remind him vacantly as you pull his hair up. When he tilts his head to look back at you you quickly backtrack, "Right now!" You walk around him and sit on the edge of the table. "I can talk to Shuri, I'm sure-"

"No," Bucky sighs, "I like not having it. Makes me feel more human."

"I could tie my arm behind my back," You offer with a grin.

"Now there's an idea," He shakes his head, "Or you could tell me what's been on your mind."

You freeze for a moment before you're able to school your features into the appropriate expression of confusion. "I have no idea what you're talking about." You knew exactly what he was talking about because there had been approximately one thing on your mind since he had woken up. One thing eating at you. The kiss. It worked its way into your thoughts like a second heartbeat. The kiss. The kiss.

"I think you do," Bucky stands up so you're closer to eye level. "Whatever it is, it's obviously bothering you. If you don't want to talk about it, I understand but if it's something I can help with…"

The kiss. The kiss. The kiss. You bite your lip, torn, and then without warning the words tumble from your lips, "The day you helped me escape," You internally curse yourself for having begun the sentence, but there was no going back now. "You kissed me."

"I remember," Bucky confirms and you internally roll your eyes. Of course he wouldn't make this easier for you.

"I guess I just want to know why." The words sound flat to your ears and you're hyper aware of his eyes searching your face.

"It was a moment of weakness on my part," Bucky says after a long pause, "I swore to myself I wouldn't tell you how I felt until I knew I had full control of my mind again. It was just too dangerous. But that day… I didn't know if I would ever see you again and I couldn't help myself. But here we are, together again."

You feel frozen in your own skin and you're dimly aware of Bucky's hand reaching forward and grabbing yours. You feel like you're outside of yourself somehow; everything feels far away. You wonder vaguely if you're going to pass out, but his next words snap you back to the moment so fast your head spins, "I'm in love with you. I have been for decades. I always thought you knew but by your expression I think I may have been wrong in that regard."

"You-" His words had apparently knocked the wind out of you because the word that leaves your mouth comes out in a breathless gasp that you quickly cut off. You couldn't remember the last time you felt this vulnerable. Your heart was beating so rapidly you knew he could hear it, but he just stood silently staring at you, a patient smile on his lips.

Your mind is working overtime, a hundred replies burn through your thoughts but they're gone before you can even register them. No more than a fraction of a second has passed but it feels like an eternity. Finally it clicks.

This was Bucky. Your Soldier. Your partner in so many ways for so long. And he wants you. _He's in love with you._

You don't even bother trying to stop your fingers from shaking as you reach up and run them down the stubble on his cheek before cupping it with your palm. This time you're the one pressing your lips to his and you're surprised by how natural it feels. How good. He drops your hand to tangle his fingers in your hair, angling your head to pull you in closer. When he pulls away you have to stop yourself from grabbing him once again. But when he smiles like he's the happiest man on Earth, eyes crinkling at the corners you can't help but bury your head into his neck, hiding the embarrassed flush on your cheeks. After a few seconds, you build up your resolve and take a step back.

"This isn't something I've really ever been able to think about," You start, choosing your words carefully, "I don't know...what I feel, or even what I can feel. But I would trade my life for yours in an instant. You've everything to me. I hope that's enough."

"You're enough," Bucky says quietly, and pulls you back to his chest, his arm tight around your waist.


	32. Chapter 32

An unfamiliar ringing rouses you from sleep, and you feel around before your fingers finally close around the small flip phone Steve had given you ages ago. Despite being in a dead sleep microseconds ago you manage to untangle yourself from Bucky and grab a robe and still answer on the third ring.

"Steve," You breathe, stepping out of the tent, "What the hell is going on?"

"It's bad (Y/n)," He admits. He sounds tired-more than that, exhausted. "I assume you saw the news footage from New York?"

"Uh yeah I saw the new footage from New York," You hiss, "Steve, how bad is it?"

"We're coming to Wakanda. All of us. We need to get the mind stone out of Vision. This guy-Thanos-is collecting infinity stones like the one in Vision and if he gets them all," Steve takes a deep breath, "He's going to kill half of all life in the Universe."

Your mouth works soundlessly for a moment, and you can hear the phone in your hand start to crack under the pressure you're putting on it. You relax your hand slightly before responding, "Can he really do that?"

"We have to assume we can. I've got to go. I'll see you soon."

The line goes dead and you slowly sink to the ground on unstable legs, letting the phone fall from your shaking hands into the grass around you.

"(Y/n)?" Bucky kneels down in front of you, eyes wide with concern. You hadn't even realized he had come out. "Was that Steve? What's going on?"

"The uh...team. They're coming here," Suddenly you let out a laugh, startling yourself. "Man, I swear I was doomed from the moment I met Steve Rogers."

"I know the feeling," Bucky smiles, and a shiver goes through you. Half the population. Fifty percent. What were the chances that both of you would make it through if you lost? Even if you won.

"I don't really know the specifics. Steve didn't say much. Someone named Thanos is collecting something called Infinity Stones and apparently if he succeeds he's planning on eliminating half of all life in the entire Universe."

"Jesus."

"So remember Vision? Red guy? Floats?" Bucky nods, "He has one of these stones embedded in his body. Mind stone, I think. Steve thinks maybe Shuri can get it out of him so they can destroy it. Stop Thanos."

As you speak T'Challa approaches with Okaye. You and Bucky both rise to your feet, your robe swirling around your legs in the wind. One of the guardsmen sets down an intricate case in front of you and opens it to reveal a vibranium arm gleaming inside.

T'Challa's mouth hardens into a line as his eyes search your face, "I take it Steve contacted you?" You nod, not trusting your voice, "I would get ready. They'll be arriving soon. I'll send someone for you.

You had expected your combat gear to feel clunky and unfamiliar after not wearing it for so long, but you were both pleased and dismayed to find that it felt like a second skin. In your down time you had patched it up and along with some vibranium sewn into the fabric it was better than new. You check your weapons thoroughly before you strap those on as well. Across from you Bucky does the same. "Feels familiar, doesn't it?"

"Yeah it does," He smiles, "Feels good to be on the hero side of things for once though."

"Hey, I assassinated some real scumbags in my time. Even if I was doing it for even worse scumbags."

"No need to explain yourself to me doll," Bucky grins, wrapping his arms around your waist, "Ready to kick some alien ass?"

"That was probably the coolest sentence you've ever said in your entire life right?" You laugh, "How's the new arm?"

Bucky flexes his metal fingers before curling his hand into a fist, "It's perfect. Can't say I'm sorry to lose the Soviet logo."

"I hate to say it, but I thought it was kind of sexy."

"Is that right doll?" He asks teasingly, his mismatched hands tightening on your hips.

"But the White Wolf is pretty hot too," You lean up on tiptoe to press your lips to his, threading your fingers into his long chestnut hair.

"Sorry to interrupt," A lilting voice says, and you look up to see one of the Wakandan soldiers, "Your friends are arriving."

You can hear Natasha's voice as you enter the building, and a surprising and unfamiliar sense of homesickness fills you, "How we looking?"

"You will have my King's Guard, the Border Tribe, the Dora Milaje, and…"

You and Bucky come around the corner, "A semi-stable, 100 year-old man and this hellion," Bucky says, a smile on his lips.

Steve wraps Bucky in a hug, "How you been Buck?"

"Uh, not bad. For the end of the world," He adds. Steve grabs you next, almost crushing you with the force of his embrace.

"I missed you," You admit, "All of you. How's Vision doing?"

"He thinks we should destroy the stone now," Steve frowns, "We think Wanda could do it. But there's some complication there. She won't. And we won't let that happen. We won't kill one of our own."

You understood where Steve was coming from, but you couldn't help but agree with the android. A glance at Bucky tells you he feels the same way. Sometimes the call of the greater good couldn't be ignored.

"Right," You sigh, "So...Tony?"

"No one has seen him since the attack on New York," Steve buries his face in his hands.

"He's gonna be fine," You tell him fiercely, "He's a stubborn bastard." Steve looks at you doubtfully, and you grab his arm, "Come on. Let's go see what Shuri has to say. You look like you could use some good news."

"Whoa," Shuri says as you walk in, standing over Vision, "The structure is polymorphic."

"Right," Banner replies, "We had to attach each neuron non-sequentially."

"Why didn't you just reprogram the synapses to work collectively?" Shuri asks, and Bruce looks up, color in his cheeks.

"Because we didn't think of it," Bruce admits sounding uncertain.

"I'm sure you did your best," Shuri tells him reassuringly, making you smile. Bruce catches your eye and gives you a small wave which you return.

"Can you do it?" Wanda demands.

"Yes, but there are more than two _trillion_ neurons here. One misalignment could cause a cascade of circuit failures," Shuri looks at T'Challa, "It will take _time _brother."

"How long?" Steve asks.

"As long as you can give me." A chiming sound fills the air and Okoye flicks one of her beads into her palm, which projects a globe with a pulsing location marker into the air.

"Something's entered the atmosphere," She announces.

"Guess it's go time," You can't help the small grin that turns your lips. It felt good to be in action again after so long.

"About damn time," Sam says as you and Bucky walk towards him, "I guess what they say is true."

"Oh yeah?" You ask, "What is it that they say again?"

"That absence makes the heart grow fonder," He grins, "Cause you are certainly a sight for sore eyes."

"Huh, see, I thought that maybe a small, tiny, miniscule part of me missed you Wilson," You tell him, "But now that I see you…"

"You realized you've been madly in love with me this whole time?"

You snort, "I was actually going to say something nice, but nevermind."

"No," Sam gasps, "Did I ruin it?"

"Yup."

"Guys-" Bucky says suddenly, "We got incoming."

You and Sam look up at the sky as an alien vessel flies towards the city. "Hey, Cap," Sam radios, "We got a situation over here."

Overhead the ship hits the barrier over Wakanda explodes, "God, I love this place," Bucky says fondly.

"Yeah, don't start celebrating yet guys," Rhodie responds over the comm, "We got more incoming outside the dome."

"On our way," Steve responds.


	33. Chapter 33

You stand beside Steve and Bucky on one of the carriers. Rhodey and Sam fly overhead, while Bruce jogs alongside in the Hulkbuster armor looking utterly delighted. Natasha gives you a small smile.

"How we looking Bruce?" She asks.

"Yeah, I think I'm getting the hang of it!" Bruce exclaims, "Wow! It's like being the Hulk without actually-" He stumbles on a rock and the carrier passes by him. "I'm okay, I'm okay."

"I got two heat signatures breaking through the tree line," Rhodie radios in. As two figures approach the barrier the carriers make abrupt u-turns, and you slide off, immediately running forward to give everyone else room to depart while the Jabari warriors begin to chant.

You watch, your body tense as T'Challa, Steve, and Natasha walk to the edge of the barrier. After a few minutes they return to the ranks.

"Did they surrender?" Bucky asks, and Steve gives him a small smile.

"Not exactly."

Another war cry erupts from the Wakandans as masses of dog-like aliens bound towards the barrier.

"What the hell?" Bucky says flatly, his eyes wide as he takes in the number of enemies approaching.

"Looks like we pissed her off," Natasha says.

As you watch the animals bombard the force-field, some get partially through before the barrier slices through them, "They're killing themselves," Okoye says, sounding horrified.

As some manage to squeeze through in-tact the Border Tribesmen drop to their knees and raise their shield while the Kingsguard level their spears over their shoulders. At T'Challa's command they fire, and you raise your own gun to take out the approaching animals.

Sam swoops overhead, firing down on a group of the aliens, "You seen the teeth on those things?"

"Alright, back up Sam. You're gonna get your wings singed," Rhodie flies towards a heavy concentration of the dogs and drops a barrage of bombs. A pack of the aliens break off from the rest and begin to run around towards the right of the forcefield.

"Cap, if these things circle the perimeter and get in behind us there's nothing between them and Vision," Bruce says.

"Then we better keep them in front of us," Steve says grimly.

"How do we do that?" Okoye asks T'Challa, and you shoot her a sympathetic look.

"We open the barrier," T'Challa raises his communication device to his mouth, "On my signal open North-West Section Seventeen. On my signal."

"This will be the end of Wakanda," M'Baku says, sounding horrified.

"Then it will be the noblest ending in history," Okoye responds fiercely.

Next to you Steve gets into position, while the Border Tribesmen disengage their shields and stand at T'Challa's command.

"Wakanda Forever!" T'Challa shouts, crossing his arms in the Wakandan salute before his helmet closes. You reach out and touch Bucky's hand briefly before beginning to run alongside T'Challa and Steve. Bucky is at your side as you approach the barrier, and T'Challa shouts, "Now!"

The aliens pour through the opening in the barrier, and you immediately open fire taking out the dogs with short bursts of rapid fire from your weapon.

"Jesus there's too many of them," You pant, slicing through one that got too close with your short sword before grabbing your pistol and taking out one coming around Bucky's blind spot. One leaps on you and your back hits the ground, you struggle for a moment, attempting to keep your face out of reach of it's snapping teeth before you manage to bring your gun to the underside of its face and pull the trigger. Blood splatters over your face and you toss the body aside, grimacing as you're once again forced to dodge a snarling dog.

"There's too many of them!" Bruce cries before letting out a yell as a handful of them get on top of him, pinning him to the ground. Your eyes widen as one takes down Bucky, snapping at his head. Before you can lift your gun a large beam of rainbow colored light appears, hitting the center of the battlefield. An ax flies out of it, and you watch in shock as it tears through the dogs, knocking the one on Bucky off and freeing Bruce. It flies back into the beam, which disappears revealing Thor along with something that looks a little like a tree and what suspiciously appears to be a raccoon with a gun.

Bruce, now on his feet opens the Hulkbusters helmet and you can hear him laugh with joy, "You guys are so screwed now!" He shouts.

"Bring. Me. Thanos." Thor declares before he launches himself into the air, landing in the midst of a large group of the alien dogs and leaving a crater where they had stood.

Bucky joins you at your side again and you stand back to back as you take out every alien that catches your eye, moving in tandem like you had done hundreds of times before.

"Come and get some space dogs!" You watch somewhere between confused and amused as the raccoon starts firing, looking like he's having a blast. A large section of the dogs head in your direction, and you nudge Bucky towards him. Bucky grabs the raccoon, lifting him up and turning, firing his own gun while you kneel, taking out as many as you can from your position. Once Bucky drops the raccoon, he looks up at him impressed.

"How much for the gun?" Bucky glances down at the raccoon amused before he lets out another burst of gunfire.

"Not for sale."

Okay," The raccoon says agreeably, "How much for the arm?" Bucky raises his eyebrows at you and shakes his head as the two of you head back towards the main frey.

"Call me crazy," You tell him as you both head towards Steve, "But I swear to god that was a talking raccoon with a fucking gun."

"He tried to buy my arm," Bucky deadpans, and you both laugh. You get about two seconds of reprieve before the motorized spike wheels appear on the battlefield. They're faster than they look and you and Bucky are forced to launch yourselves in opposite directions to avoid being shredded.

"Fuck me," You groan, sending a barrage of bullets into the wheel with no effect.

"Focus that fire on the left flank Sam," You hear Rhodie over the comms and in the distance you can see the two of them trying to destroy one of the spike-wheels with no luck.

"Guys, we got a Vision situation here," Sam calls.

"Somebody get to Vision!" Steve shouts.

"I got him!" Bruce exclaims. You're once again forced to launch yourself out of the way of one of the spike-wheels and then Bucky's there, pulling you to your feet.

"Thanks," You tell him, your hands on your knees as you catch your breath, "Ah, jeez. Incoming, 12 o'clock," Bucky turns as you pull out your assault rifle and open fire on a mass of the snarling aliens.

"Guys!" Bruce yells over the comm, "Vision needs backup _now_!"

"Buck and I are locked down," You respond as you bash one of the dogs with the butt of your weapon before gunning down a second one.

"I'm on it," Steve radios back.

The fight on the ground starts to clear up considerably, and then inexplicably the alien's begin to retreat.

"What the-" Suddenly there's a shift in the air and you pause as an eerie feeling settles over you.

"Everyone, on my position," Steve says suddenly, "We've got incoming."

You head in that direction on Bucky's heels, taking out the straggling enemies as you pass them.

He runs in first, open firing on the large purple man and is punched away, you can see one of the stones glowing in the large golden gauntlet on the man's hand. You leap over him, landing on the man's shoulders agilely and pull the trigger of the pistol you have against his head. You watch, wide eyed as bubbles float out of your gun and then slam the butt of the useless weapon into the back of his head with all your strength. His head snaps forward and then one large hand reaches up and closes around your throat pulling you off of him. He eyes you speculatively for a moment, before he throws you, and you hit a tree several feet away which cracks under the impact.

You let out a quiet gasp as a piece of the splintered pieces stabs through your thigh and another impales your bicep. You struggle to free yourself as Steve attacks Thanos alone, but are unable to stop your friend from being punched to the ground.

You watch helplessly as Thanos studies the completed gauntlet, and then a glimmer of hope floods your body as a bolt of lightning hits him, digging him into the ground and pushing him backwards.

Thor hurls his axe at Thanos, who sends the combined power of the stones at it to no avail. Your eyes widen as the axe slams into Thanos' chest.

Thor lands in front of Thanos, who has fallen down onto one knee. "I told you. You'd die for that!" Thor grabs Thanos' head and forces the axe deeper into his chest.

"You should have...You…" Thanos raises his head "You should have gone for the head."

"No!" You scream out as Thanos' fingers come together and he snaps them once. Thor lets out a roar of disbelief and you feel the hope you have collapse within itself leaving you feeling empty. Thor looks back at you helplessly.

"What did you do?" Thor screams, turning back to him, "What did you do?!" Before your eyes Thanos disappears, leaving Thor's bloodied axe laying on the ground where he stood.

"Where'd he go?" Steve asks, stumbling towards the Asgardian, "Thor… Where'd he go?"

You manage to pull yourself off of the splintered tree and climb to your feet, ignoring the blood you can feel running down your skin under your suit. You make a beeline for Bucky, helping him to his feet. "Nothing happened," You say slowly, "Dit it work?"

"You saw what it did to him," Steve shakes his head, "Maybe…"

"(Y/n)?" Bucky says suddenly and the pressure of his hand in yours is suddenly gone. You look over to watch him collapse into ashes right beside you, horrified.

"No," You breathe, unable to accept what you had just seen, "No." Somewhere you can hear Rhodie yelling for Sam. You look up at Steve, tears in your eyes. "Steve."

Steve walks over to Vision's body without answering. and you follow him blindly with heavy footsteps, collapsing down next to a tree a few feet from him. At some point the raccoon sits down heavily next to you, looking a little like you felt. You wondered who he had lost. You weren't sure who all was left, but you, Steve, Thor, Rhodie, Nat, Bruce and the raccoon were the only ones nearby.

"What is this?" Rhodie says, breaking the tense silence that had fallen over all of you, "What the hell is happening?"

Steve doesn't respond, he just looks over at you from where he kneels at Vision's side, his expression hopeless, as he lets out a shaky, "Oh god," and buries his head in his hands.


	34. Chapter 34

You sit off to the side, watching with narrowed eyes as the death counts from Thanos' attack calculate per country. "This is a nightmare," Steve breathes, his face looking worn.

"I've had better nightmares," Natasha responds, unable to drag her eyes away from the screen.

"There's gotta be something we can do!" You throw your hands up, and Natasha and Steve look at you surprised, "Something besides just sitting here and watching that _thing_ flash. We don't even know what it is! We need to be out there, hunting him down. Making him undo this. Making him pay."

"(Y/n), we don't even know-" Steve starts, before Bruce bursts into the room.

"Hey guys," He says gently, taking in your angry expression and Steve and Natasha's wary ones, "So, that thing just stopped doing whatever the hell it was doing."

"Oh, so it stopped doing absolutely nothing?" You mutter under your breath but you can't help the pull of curiosity and you follow them back into the lab. The pager, or whatever the hell it was had indeed stopped flashing.

"Whatever signal it was sending out finally crapped out," Bruce continues.

"I thought we bypassed the battery?" Steve frowns.

"We did," Rhodie confirms, "It's still plugged in… It just stopped."

"Reboot it," Steve says, "Send the signal again."

"Yeah, but we don't even know what this is," Bruce interjects.

"Fury did," Natasha responds, and you roll your eyes, "Just do it please. And tell me the second you get a signal. I want to know who's on the other end of that thing."

"I'll tell you who's on the other end of that thing," The words pour out of you, hot and angry, "Just another one of the people Thanos vaporized. We're wasting our time here on a 50% chance. No one is coming to help. But if you want to stay here and jerk each other off over a flashing light, be my guest." You spin on your heel, your eyes widening at the woman now standing in the doorway. "What the-" Your hand goes to your holster, and just meets the fabric of your sweatpants.

Eyes tracking the movement of your hand the woman cocks her head. "Where is Fury?" She demands.

The woman it turns out is Carol Danvers, originally from Earth, got too close to an Infinity Stone, and now flies around outer space. You listen to her relay the recent events from her side of things, and then Steve launches into a play by play of what had happened here on Earth.

"Rocket still has friends we think are out there," Steve tells her finally, "Their ship is moving, albeit slowly, but we do have a signal we're picking up on. We just don't have the resources to get there."

"I'll get them," Danvers says, rising to her feet. She looks like the type that can't stay still for long. You empathize; you'd do almost anything to feel like you were moving in a forward direction again. "Look for my return."

"Well that was a waste of time," You slump back in your chair as she leaves, "Unless one of your friends knows where the hell Thanos is?" You direct the last part to the raccoon who glares back at you, arms crossed.

"Well Gamora was with them," He says, "And she's his stepdaughter, so I thought, hey, maybe she might know where her pops would go after single handedly destroying the universe!" He shouts the last word at you and you hop to your feet.

"You little mangy-"

"(Y/n)!" Steve shouts, slamming his hands on the table. "Cut it out, all right? You're not the only one who lost someone. We need to stay focused here. Let's say this Gamora does know where we can find Thanos, we still need a plan of attack." You grit your teeth as he continues talking. You had a plan, make Thanos regret ever even thinking about the Infinity Stones.


	35. Chapter 35

Left. Left. Right. Left. Right. You try to focus on nothing except for the steady rhythm your fist beat out on the punching bag. You had no idea how long you'd be in the compound's training room but the first rays of morning light had touched the windows hours ago. Your nightmares were worse than ever and you had taken to training relentlessly during the night to ward them off.

Right, right, left right. With your last punch the chain snaps, sending the punching bag to the floor. The impact sends a ripple through the ground. You take a deep breath, trying to calm the anger that seemed to hover just below the surface of your skin at all times lately when you realize the ripple wasn't from the punching bag at all. The whole goddamn compound was shaking. You head towards the door, kicking the punching bag on your way out.

Steve, Nat, Bruce and Rhodie are all standing outside. "We under attack?" You call as you approach them and Steve shakes his head. You pointedly ignore the look Steve gives your bloody knuckles and instead look up at the spacecraft being set down by Danvers. When it touches down the entry hatch opens and Tony emerges, some kind of blue android supporting his weight. Steve darts forward to help him down and your feet carry you as well, grabbing his other arm and helping him down the slanted platform.

"Couldn't stop him," Tony says weakly.

"Neither could we," Steve responds.

"I lost the kid."

"Tony, we lost," Steve says simply. And wasn't that the truth? You had lost. Lost everything.

"Is...uh…?" Tony struggles to find words for a moment, and then Pepper rushes out of the compound, tears in her eyes.

"Oh my god," She throws her arms around him, "Oh my god." You have to look away as the embrace, and your eyes find the android standing awkwardly away from the group.

"Hey," You say quietly, and her head snaps up to look at you, "Thanks." You nod towards Tony and her fierce expression softens slightly and she nods in return. "I'm (Y/n)."

"Nebula," She responds.

"Nat," Steve says, and you turn to look at him, "Get everyone here. We all need to talk." 

"It's been 23 days since Thanos came to Earth," Rhodie starts, looking around the table.

"World governments are in pieces. The parts that are still working are trying to take a census," Nat continues, "And it looks like he did...He did exactly what he said he was gonna do. Thanos wiped out fifty percent of all living creatures."

"Where is he now? Where?" Tony demands. He's got a IV in, pumping blood into his system, but he looks weaker than ever.

"We don't know," Steve says, "He just opened a portal and walked through."

Tony's eyes shift over to where Thor sits away from the group, his shoulders slumped as he looks off into the distance. "What's wrong with him?" He asks.

"Oh, he's pissed," Rocket says from the seat next to you, "He thinks he failed. Which of course he did. But you know there's a lot of that going around, ain't there?"

"Honestly, until this exact second I thought you were a Build-A-Bear," Tony responds, and you snort.

"Maybe I am," Rocket responds with a shrug.

"We've been hunting Thanos for three weeks now. Deep space scans and satellites. And we got nothing. Tony, you fought him…"

"Who told you that?" Tony looks surprised, "I didn't fight him. No. He wiped my face with a _planet_ while the Bleeker Street Magician gave away the store. That's what happened. There was no fight."

"Okay," Steve responds.

"He's unbeatable," Tony continues.

"Did he give you any clues? Coordinates? Anything?" Steve asks.

"I saw this coming a few years back!" Tony's getting angry now, "I had a vision. I didn't wanna believe it. Thought I was dreaming."

"Tony, I'm gonna need you to focus," Steve tries.

"And I needed _you_. As in past tense. That trumps what you need. It's too late buddy. Sorry. You know what I need?" Tony stands up, pushing everything off the table with a loud clatter, "I need to shave. And I believe I remember telling all you-"

Tony moves towards Steve, and Rhodie cuts him off. "Tony, Tony."

"-What we needed was a suit of armor around the world! Remember that?" He demands, "Whether it impacted our precious freedoms or not-that's what we needed!"

"Well that didn't work did it?"

"I said, 'we'd lose'. You said 'we'll do that together too'. And guess what Cap? We lost. And you weren't there. Any of you. But that's what we do right? Our best work after the fact? We're the Avengers. Not the Prevengers."

"Okay," Rhodie tries again.

"Right?"

"You made your point," Rhodie says, "Just sit down."

"Nah, nah, Here's my point," Tony says, "You know what?"

"Tony, you're sick," Rhodie says.

"She's great, by the way," Tony gestures towards Danvers who watches impassively.

"Sit down," Rhodie demands, "Sit."

"We need you," Tony says, ignoring Rhodie completely, "You're new blood. Bunch of tired old mules! I got nothing for you Cap! I got no coordinates, no clues, no strategies, no options. Zero. Zip. Nada. No trust. Liar."

Steve looks crushed as the two of them look at each other. "Tony," You try and his eyes dart to you.

"Don't you even fucking speak to me," Tony says coldly, "Ever."

You recoil as if slapped, falling back into your chair that you had half risen from. "Here, take this," Tony says, ripping the arc reactor from his chest and shoving it into Steve's hand, "You find him and you put that on. You hide." Tony sways for a moment and then falls to the ground.

Steve is by his side in a second, and you dig your nails into your kneecap. You want to scream. How can everything be this wrong, when just a month ago you had your first taste of happiness? "Tony!" Steve tries.

"I'm fine… I…" His eyes flutter closed and you let out the breath you had been holding.

You look away from where Tony sleeps in bed, Pepper holding his limp hand in hers to Rhodey. "Bruce gave him a sedative. He's gonna probably be out for the rest of the day."

"You guys take care of him," Danvers says, "And I'll bring him a Xorrian Elixir when I come back."

"Where are you going?" Nat asks.

"To kill Thanos," Danvers responds.

You scoff and Nat glances at you before turning to Danvers, "Hey, you know, we usually work as a team here, and between you and I, morale's a little fragile."

"We realize up there is more your territory, but this is our fight too," Steve says.

"You even know where he is?" Rhodey asks.

"I know people who might."

"Okay, is she serious right now?" You snap.

"Don't bother," Nebula speaks up from behind Danvers, "I can tell you where Thanos is. Thanos spent a long time trying to perfect me. And when he worked he talked about his great plan. Even disassembled I wanted to please him. I'd ask 'where would we go once his plan was complete?' His answer was always the same: 'to the garden'".

"That's cute," Rhodey says, "Thanos has a retirement plan."

"So where is he?" Steve asks, confused.

"When Thanos snapped his fingers, Earth became ground zero for a power surge of ridiculously cosmic proportions. No one's ever seen anything like it...Until two days ago," Rocket brings up a hologram of a planet with a shockwave visibly traversing the surface, "On this planet."

"Thanos is there," Nebula says simply.

"He used the stones again," Natasha says, her voice resigned.

"Hey, hey, hey," Bruce cuts in, "We'd be going in short-handed you know."

"Look, he's still got the stones, so…" Rhodey adds.

"So let's get them… Use them to bring everyone back," Danvers says.

"Just like that?" Rhodey asks.

"Yeah, just like that."

"Even if there's a small chance that we can undo this… I mean we owe it to everyone who's not in this room to try," Natasha says, her eyes on you. You once again feel a flood of anger; you were tired of everyone looking at you like you were a time bomb. Like another threat.

"If we do this, how do we know it's gonna end any differently than it did before?" Bruce asks.

"Because before you didn't have me," Danvers says.

"Hey, new girl. Everyone here is about that superhero life," Rhodey says, "And if you don't mind my asking where the hell have you been all this time?"

"There are a lot of other planets in the universe. And unfortunately they didn't have you guys."

Thor stands up and walks over to Danvers, facing her down. He holds his hand up and catches his axe as it passes by Danvers' head by inches. She doesn't flinch, and instead smiles.

"I like this one," Thor smiles.

"Guys, it doesn't matter if this chick is all that or not. What other choice do we have? We finally have a line on Thanos. This is what we've been waiting for. I don't really see what else there is to discuss," You tell them, "I'm going with Super Blonde over there. We need to end this. One way or another."

Steve looks at you for a moment before smiling, "Let's go get this son of a bitch."


	36. Chapter 36

Space. You were going into space. No big deal right? You tug at the straps of your harness casually, testing the strength. "Okay," Rocket says, "Who here hasn't been to space?"

Nat, Steve, and Rhodie all raise their hands, and rolling your eyes you raise your own, quickly dropping it back to your side. "Why?" Rhodie asks suspiciously.

Rocket just turns around, fiddling with some controls, "You better not throw up on my ship," he warns.

"Approaching jump in three...two...one!" Nebula declares. Suddenly the ship lurches forward with a sickening speed and you feel like all of your internal organs bounce off of your spine. After what seems like no time at all the ship slows down and hovers above a planet you recognize from the hologram. Danvers appears in front of the ship, glowing faintly.

"I'll head down for recon."

"This is gonna work Steve," Nat says gently as you prepare to depart the ship.

"I know it will," Steve says, but his voice sounds resigned, "'Cause I don't know what I'm going to do if it doesn't."

"It will," You echo firmly, "This is it Steve. We're going to bring him home once and for all." And you could feel it, the certainty that you were on the right path. This was all going to be over soon.

"No satellites, no ships, no armies, no ground defences of any kind," Danvers informs you as she returns, "It's just him."

"And that's enough," Nebula says darkly.

You enter the building last with Steve and Natasha, your finger hovering over the trigger as the barrel of your gun automatically finds Thanos' head. You take in the scene, the gauntlet is on the floor, still attached to Thanos' arm. Based on the blood dripping of Stormbreaker, you had to assume Thor was the culprit. Good. You hoped it hurt.

You watch with a calm satisfaction as Rocket walks over to it and kicks it over. For a second you can't breathe as you take in the empty hollows in the surface of the metal. The stones were gone.

"Where are they?" Steve demands.

"Answer the question!" Danvers shouts. You can't take your eyes off of the gauntlet.

"The universe required correction," Thanos responds, "After that the stones served no purpose beyond temptation."

"You murdered trillions!" Bruce pushes him to the ground, powered by the Hulkbuster armor.

"You should be grateful," Thanos says before Bruce's fist hits the side of his face. That snaps you out of it.

"That doesn't answer the question," Your voice is quiet compared to Bruce's shouts, "Where are the stones?"

"Gone. Reduced to atoms." The anger that had been pulsating beneath your skin seems to jump into overdrive, and you have to clench your fists to keep yourself stationary. He had to be lying. You had to find the stones.

"You used them two days ago," Bruce cries.

"I used the stones to destroy the stones," Thanos explains, "It nearly killed me. But my work is done. It always will be. I am... inevitable."

"We have to tear this place apart," An edge of panic is creeping into Rhodie's voice, "He-he has to be lying."

"My father is many things," Nebula says, "A liar is not one of them."

"Ah, thank you daughter," Thanos says quietly, "Perhaps I treated you too harshly."

The certainty that you had implodes and suddenly you know how deluded you had been. There was no fixing this. There was no fixing anything. The stones were gone. _He was gone_. The anger you had been fighting to keep down explodes out of you in a guttural scream and you lurch forward, pulling your short sword from its holster as you move. "(Y/n), no!" You hear Steve shout faintly, but you only have eyes for the purple titan.

Steve hits you hard from the side, knocking you to the ground. You scramble to grab your sword but Steve's on top of you in an instant, knee pressing into your back. And he doesn't stand a chance of stopping Thor as he summons his axe and charges forward, slicing Thanos' head off with a single blow. The head lands on the floor, inches from yours and a cry of triumph rips through your throat.

"What...What did you do?" Rocket demands, horrified.

You stare into Thanos' dead eyes as Thor responds, voice thick, "I went for the head."

You hear his footsteps retreat and a numbness slowly seeps into you, replacing the all encompassing anger. "Let me up Steve," You say softly, "It's over."


	37. Chapter 37

"(Y/n)?" A soft knocking comes from your door. You don't open your eyes. You don't respond. After a second you hear a sigh. Outside Steve leans against your door. "Please, (Y/n). It's been days. Just eat something at the very least. I...I could really use someone right now, and I think you could too." You bite your lip to keep from calling out to him. Steve sighs again and takes a step back from the door. When you hear him turn to walk away you slip from your bed and cross the room with silent footsteps. Your hand hesitates on the knob and then you turn it.

Steve turns back around, a plate in one hand, his eyes wide with surprise. You avoid his gaze as you return to your bed, leaving the door open behind you. After a second he follows.

He settles on the edge of your bed, watching as you hesitantly take a bite of the sandwich he had brought. You wonder how bad you look. You don't particularly care.

After you take a few bites he clears his throat. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No," You say immediately, the word coming out harsher than you intended it. You weren't even sure if that was true. You take another bite without tasting it, chewing slowly. "Maybe," You relent, "I don't know." He doesn't say anything, just watches you, and suddenly the words that you had been holding in rush out, "It's just not fair after everything. Things were finally…We were finally happy."

You drop the remains of your sandwich onto the plate and shove it away from you. "I know everyone lost people but…"

He nods, "It seems like you and Buck got really close during your time in Wakanda." The sound of his name threatens to break you. You can see a shadow of your own pain reflected in Steve's eyes and it unlocks something in you, to your horror your lower lip begins to tremble.

"I was in love with him" The last word comes out a broken sob and you tear your eyes away from Steve, shame flooding you, "And I never told him. I should have told him…" You trail off, a tear sliding down your cheek as you stare at your hands folded in your lap.

"I'm sure he knew," Steve says, "I did. I'm glad he had you. And you had him. I always blamed myself for what HYDRA did to him, but at least it gave you each other."

This time you embraced the anger that flooded you at his words, anything to take away the numbness you had been floating in since Thanos' death. "For what?" You ask bitterly, "For this? This is bullshit Steve. This isn't how it's supposed to work. Outer space and magic stones?" The plate leaves your hand and shatters against the wall. You weren't even aware of having picked it up. You look at the broken porcelain with wide eyes. "I-please leave," You say suddenly, "I need to be alone right now. Please."

You cut off the cry that escapes your lips the second you awake, sweat heavy on your face. You wait for a moment, but no one approaches your room; they were used to your nightmares at this point. Shrugging out of the blanket, you head towards the kitchen, your bare feet silent as you make your way through the darkened abandoned corridors. There's a light on in the living area so you peek your head in; Rocket is sitting on the sofa, an open bottle of vodka on the table next to him.

Target acquired, you walk past, snagging the bottle before sitting down on the other end of the sofa. You down half the bottle in one chug, savoring the burn as it slides down your throat.

"Can't sleep?" The raccoon asks offhandedly. You shoot him a glare and take another swig. It doesn't deter him. "You lost someone right? That guy you were with-the one with the arm." You let the clench of your jaw answer for you, but Rocket just nods, "Yeah. I lost someone too."

Your eyes soften a little at that, and you tip the bottle, letting a fair amount fall into his empty glass. "Someone's gonna have to make a run," You sigh and finish off the bottle. "This is the last of my stash. I think Steve and Natasha have been dumping it when I'm not around."

"Well seeing that on this planet I'm something called a _rahoon_, that'd probably be a job for you," Rocket kicks back the rest of his glass and climbs down from the sofa.

"It's-" You start to correct him and think better of it, "Never mind."

He nods and heads towards the door before calling back over his shoulder, "And get some chips!"

"Chips," You mutter, shaking your head once he's gone. "Talking racoon. I'll never get used to it."

You glance up as Rocket comes in. After spending most nights together drinking for the past month or so, you were used to his appearance, though you hadn't seen him in a few days and never this early. Your hands, bloodied from the punching bags once more were wrapped around another bottle, this one whiskey.

"What's up Rocky?" You offer the bottle and he shakes his head.

"Nah, I just wanted to say goodbye," Rocket climbs up onto the sofa, "I'm headed out on a mission."

"Seriously?" You snort, "What's the point?"

"The point is maybe having something to do will take my mind off of the current situation," Rocket sighs, "Maybe you should try it."

"I really doubt it would help," You narrow your eyes, "But have fun, or whatever."

Rocket sighs, "You can't keep doing this. I like you (Y/n), but you need to pull yourself together," He moves his paw and sets it on your knee, "You're a mess."

You let out a bitter laugh and rise to your feet, swaying slightly, "Right. Yeah. Let me just take advice from a goddamn raccoon," You take a swig from your bottle, "Hope your little mission makes everything better for you buddy."

You stumble through the door to your room and almost trip over the two empty bottles on the floor. You try to do a mental count-was this really your third one today? It was only three o'clock. Maybe Rocket had a point. Usually the alcohol was enough to soothe the fiery temper that always seemed to be on a hairpin trigger with you lately, but not today. You throw the empty bottle in your hand against the wall with as much force as you can muster, watching the shards fall into the expensive carpeting. A small sob escapes your lips and you slide down the door, burying your face into your hands.

You needed to pull yourself together.


	38. Chapter 38

You lay on your side facing the window that looks out over Brooklyn. When Steve had told you he was getting an apartment in the city you had jumped at the opportunity for a change of scenery. But on days like today you often regretted your decision. "Come on (Y/n)!" Steve pounds on your door, "We made a deal."

You roll your eyes and climb out of the bed, slipping into the flip flops by the door. When you swing the door open he's still standing there, hand poised to knock again. "Yeah, I get it dude." You shuffle past him, "You leave me alone, I go to some stupid meeting for sad people."

"It's a group for people like us," Steve says passionately, "People who lost people. People who yeah, are sad I guess."

"Well I'm not sad Steve," You tell him, mashing the button for the elevator, "I'm fucking pissed. You got a group for that? Because all of you, every single one of you has just given up. It makes me fucking sick."

"Oh yeah? Have you been searching for answers this whole time?" Steve snaps, "I don't think you're going to find them at the bottom of a bottle." Your mouth closes with an audible snap and Steve looks at you sheepishly, "Sorry. I didn't mean that."

"You did."

"I shouldn't have said it then," Steve scratches the back of his head, "I know you're-"

"Cut the shit Steve," You push open the door to the cafe, "Let's just get this over with."

"So I uh… Went on a date the other day," The man across from you says, "First time in five years, you know? Sit there… Dinner… I didn't know what to talk about."

Your eyes don't move from the poster on the wall as the man talks. "What did you talk about?" Steve asks.

"Same old crap, you know? How things have changed and… My job… His job… How much we miss the Mets. Then things get quiet. He cried as they were serving the salads.

'Where do we go, now that they're gone?' The poster asks.

"How about you?" Another member of the circle asks.

"I cried just before dessert. But I'm seeing him tomorrow so…"

"That's great," Steve says, "You did the hardest part. You took the jump, you didn't know where you were gonna come down, And that's it…"

Suddenly it's like somebody turned down the volume. You know Steve's still talking but you can't make out a single word. All you knew is that you couldn't be here one more second. You can't sit here in this abandoned cafe staring at this bullshit poster while listening to another Steve Rogers pep talk. You stand abruptly, the chair squealing against the linoleum as it's pushed back.

"(Y/n)?" Steve asks, but you're already at the door pushing it open. The glass shatters when it slams behind you. Outside in the city wasn't much better. New York is much too quiet. There's no hustle or bustle. It makes your skin crawl.

You sprint back to the apartment at full speed ignoring the shocked looks people give your inhuman speed. You couldn't care less what they thought. You're pretty sure you're going to lose it if you have to go back into the apartment so you just break the window of your car sitting on the street and have it hotwired in seconds.

With no destination in mind you just start driving. If there was one thing Thanos' snap did it was help traffic. It's not until you're almost there that you realize you had driven upstate and you pull into the Avengers' garage mostly on automatic. When you get inside Natasha is waiting for you, leaning against the wall with crossed arms. Steve must have called her.

"You look terrible," She tells you, "(Y/n), you gotta pull it together."

"Please don't," You grumble, "I've heard it all from Stars and Stripes already, alright? I just want to be left alone."

"That's a lie," Natasha says and you raise an eyebrow, "You could have gone anywhere in the world. No shortage of room these days. But you came here." Maybe she was right, maybe she wasn't. You weren't even sure yourself. So you settle for a sad half shrug and start towards your old room. "(Y/n), wait," Natasha grabs your arm. "I haven't seen a human being that isn't a hologram in weeks. Let's do something, we could watch a movie or-"

You shake her off. "Not right now," You tell her without turning around. "I'm tired," you lie before continuing up to your room. You can feel her eyes on your back until you turn the corner. A few seconds later you hear her talking to Steve but you're too far away to make out the words. Not that you particularly care what they're saying about you, and you could probably guess most of it already.

You were tired but you crawl into bed anyway, pulling the blankets up over your face to block out the light. Leaving the city didn't give you the relief you were looking for. At this point it felt like nothing would.


	39. Chapter 39

You're only half listening to the group call as you sit alone by the window, your cheek pressed against the glass as you absentmindedly watch the clouds overhead. An uneaten sandwich sits on the table next to you along with a glass of water and a bottle of aspirin. For your hangover, Natasha had said offhandedly.

Familiar footsteps coming down the hall grab your attention and you look up in time to see Natasha end the call before wiping tears from her face. Steve pops in a second later, "You know, I'd offer to cook you dinner but you seem pretty miserable already," he tries to joke.

"You here to do your laundry," Natasha retorts, a small smile playing on her lips.

"To see some friends," Steve glances in your direction and you turn to look back out the window. You hadn't spoken to him since your abrupt departure from the city.

"Clearly your friends are fine." You wonder if Natasha would have said the same thing if you weren't in the room. From Steve's expression you doubt he believes her offhand remark.

"You know, I saw a pod of whales when I was coming up the bridge," Steve says conversationally. You don't look up.

"In the Hudson?" Natasha asks, surprised.

"There's fewer ships," Steve explains, "Cleaner water."

"You know if you're about to tell me to look on the bright side, I'm about to hit you in the head with a peanut butter sandwich," Natasha threatens, but you can tell from the sound of her voice that she's smiling.

"Sorry," Steve tosses his jacket on a chair and sits down, "Force of habit."

You start to stand up, leaving your untouched food on the table so Steve can ask Natasha about you without you hearing when a soft crackle grabs your attention. You pause midstep, turning towards Steve and Natasha with your eyebrows raised.

"Uh..Oh! Hi. Hi! Is anyone home? This is Scott Lang. We met a few years ago at the airport? In Germany? I got really big, and I had my mask on. You wouldn't recognize me."

"What the hell?" You slip past Steve to get a look at the security footage. "What is this?"

"Is this an old message?" Steve demands.

"It's the front gate," Natasha says, rising to her own feet.

"Ant-Man? Ant-Man. I know you know that," Lang continues, "I need to talk to you guys." As if in a dream Natasha slowly presses the door release button, and after a moment of surprise you all watch Lang enter.

You had had a tenuous grip on your anger all day, and Scott's arrival pushes you over the edge. You stride forward when he enters the room, your face inches from his. "So what's the fucking deal?" You're aware of Steve and Natasha's eyes on you and it only spurs you on, "We had an all hands on deck situation here, you know?" The words tear out of your throat like razor blades, leaving a bitter pain behind but also a modicum of relief, "And you just show up five fucking years later and you need to 'talk to us'?"

"(Y/n)!" Steve grabs your shoulder, yanking you away from the surprised man. You twist out of his grip easily. "Do you want to give him a chance to talk or do you just want to jump down his throat without any information?"

"I just want a fucking explanation!" You snarl rounding on him now, "I just want some fucking answers!" Without thinking you slam your fist into the wall next to you; you barely even feel it as your knuckles re-split for what has to be the hundredth time. Shame floods you as you see the expressions on the faces around you. Chest heaving, you fall into the nearest chair facing away from your companions.

"I-" Steve sighs, "Things have been tough here Scott, she didn't mean-"

"No, it's totally fine," Scott says quickly. "I totally get it."

"So what's up?" Natasha cuts in. This seems to remind Scott why he was there in the first place and he begins pacing in the center of the floor. You turn slightly in your seat to watch.

"Scott," Steve's brow furrows, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Scott keeps pacing for a moment before stopping. "Have you ever studied quantum physics?"

"Only to make conversation," Nat quips.

"Alright. So… Five years ago. Right before Thanos. I was in a place called the Quantum Realm. The Quantum Realm is like its own microscopic universe. To get in there you have to be incredibly small. Hope, she's my… She was my…" Scott swallows thickly, "She was supposed to pull me out. And then Thanos happened, and I got stuck in there."

The bitter taste of guilt starts to burn at the back of your throat and you're forced to look away again.

"I'm sorry," Nat tells him, "That must have been a very long five years."

"Yeah, but that's just it," Scott exclaims, "For me it was five _hours_. See the rules of the Quantum Realm aren't like they are up here. Everything is unpredictable. Is that anybody's sandwich? I'm starving."

"Scott, what are you talking about?" Steve asks as Scott grabs Natasha's half eaten sandwich.

"What I'm saying is, time works differently in the Quantum Realm. The only problem is right now we don't have a way to navigate it. But what if we did?" Scott asks, "I can't stop thinking about it. What if we could somehow control the chaos and we could navigate it? What if there was a way to enter the Quantum Realm at a certain point in time but then exit at another point in time? Like… Like before Thanos?"

"Wait," Steve frowns, "Are you talking about a time machine?"

"No! No. Of course not. No, not a time machine. It's more like a…" Scott struggles to find another word to describe it, "Yeah. A time machine. I know it's crazy. But I can't stop thinking about it. There's gotta be some way. There's gotta be… It's crazy."

"I get emails from a raccoon so nothing sounds crazy anymore," Natasha tells him.

"So who do we talk to about this?" Scott asks, and you finally let out the breath you had been holding.

"Right. So you want to solve the mystery of time travel," You say, rising to your feet. Scott eyes you nervously. "Okay. I'll buy it. Why not? And then what? We go get our asses kicked a second time? Go through this fucking _hell_ a second time? Because, I know you weren't there, but it wasn't a close fight. Not the one I was in. We didn't almost win. We got fucking decimated. I don't need an instant replay of that."

"It's an idea," Steve sighs, "That's more than we had before."


	40. Chapter 40

You're hesitant as you climb out of the car, unsure what Tony's reaction to seeing you again will be. He stands on the porch, his face resigned as he sends a little girl into the house.

You can't help but watch his face as Tony listens to Lang's plan, and you know by the end of it he'll refuse.

"Now, we know what it sounds like.." Lang tacks on at the end, noticing Tony's expression.

"Tony, after everything you've seen, is anything really impossible?" Steve asks gently.

Tony looks at him for a moment before his gaze lands on Lang, "Quantum fluctuation messes with the Planck scale," Tony says, "Which then triggers the Deutsch proposition. Can we agree on that?"

None of you answer, satisfied, Tony walks into the house for a moment before returning with a platter of drinks. You avoid his eyes as you take the glass, too nervous to find out what you would see in them. "In Layman's terms," Tony continues, "It means you're not coming home."

"I did," Scott argues.

"No, you accidentally survived," Tony tells him firmly, "It's a billion to one cosmic fluke. And now you want to pull off a… What do you call it?"

"A time heist?" Scott sounds hesitant, knowing it was all going to go downhill from here you kick back your drink. It's too sweet; you try to remember the last time you had something that wasn't straight liquor.

"Yeah, a time heist," Tony says, "Of course, why didn't we think of this before? Oh, because it's laughable? Because it's a pipedream?"

"The stones are in the past," Lang argues, "We can go back and get them."

"We can snap our own fingers," Natasha adds, "We can bring everyone back."

"Or screw it up worse than he already has, right?" Tony snaps.

"I don't believe we would," Steve says gently.

"Gotta say, sometimes I miss that giddy optimism," Stark says, "However high hopes won't help if there's no logical, tangible way for me to safely execute said time heist. I believe the most likely outcome would be our collective demise."

"Not if we strictly follow the rules of time travel," Lang explains, "That means no talking to our past selves, no betting on sporting events-"

"I'm gonna stop you right there Scott," Tony cuts in, "Are you seriously telling me that your plan to save the universe is based on _Back to the Future_?"

"No," Lang says, face flushed.

"Good," Tony says, "You had me worried there. 'Cause that'd be horse shit. That's not how quantum physics works."

"Tony… We have to take a stand," Nat tells him.

"We did stand," Tony says cooly, "And yet here we are. You're quiet," Tony's eyes finally shift over to you, "Nothing to add? No inspiration? No high hopes?"

"No," You say simply. Steve shoots you a look that you pointedly ignore.

"I know you got a lot on the line," Lang interrupts, "You got a wife, a daughter. But I lost someone very important to me. A lot of people did. And now, now we have a chance to bring her back. Bring everyone back. And you're telling me that you won't even-"

"That's right Scott," Tony cuts in, "I won't even. I got a kid."

As if on cue, the young girl runs into the room to her dad, who scoops her into his arms.

"Mommy told me to come and save you," She tells him.

"Good job, I'm saved," Tony turns back to look at you all, "I wish you'd come here to ask me something else. Anything else. Honestly I… I missed you guys, it was… Oh, and table's set for seven."

"Tony, I get it," Steve tries one more time, "And I'm happy for you. I really am. But this is a second chance."

"I got my second chance right here," Tony tells him, "Cap, I can't roll the dice again. If you don't talk shop you can stay for lunch."

As the others walk back to the car you linger behind for a moment, hesitantly. "Tony, I-"

"Save it kid," He tells you, "I know. I'm sorry too. I was out of line."

"Oh," You say surprised, "I wasn't expecting that."

"Yeah well," Tony sighs, running a hand through his hair. You can tell your visit has rattled him. "So tell me, what do you think of this plan?'

You shrug, "Seems impossible. I'm not going to waste any time on false hope. I can't. I can't bet on the impossible."

"Yeah," Tony hesitates, then wraps his arms around you, "Take care of yourself."

"You too," You look around one last time, "You got a good thing here Tony, take care of it."

Everyone's waiting in the car, and you climb into the backseat with Lang. Despite what you had said, a small part of you felt like it was shriveling up. If Tony would have only said it was possible…

"Thanks for all your support back there," Steve says through a clenched jaw, "You really helped out."

"What, do you want me to lie to the man?" You snap, "I'm here, aren't I?"

"I don't think that's good enough anymore," Steve says cooly, "We're going to see Banner. Are you with us, or should I drop you off somewhere?"

"Let's go see Banner," You sigh and close the door behind you.


	41. Chapter 41

You can't help but stare at Bruce from across the table as he slams down a plate of eggs. You take a sip of your coffee for something to do. It feels delightful on your empty stomach so you take another and then rest it back on the table.

"Come on, I feel like I'm the only one eating," Bruce pushes a plate forward with one large green hand, "Try some of that. Have some eggs."

"I'm so confused," Lang says finally.

"These are confusing times," Banner tells him sagely.

"Right," Lang agrees, and then shakes his head, "No, no, that's not what I meant."

"No, I get it," Bruce laughs, "I'm kidding! I know. It's crazy. I'm wearing shirts now."

"Yeah! How? Why?" Lang asks.

"Five years ago, we got our asses beaten. Except it was worse for me. Because I lost twice. First Hulk lost, then Banner lost. Then we all lost."

"No one blamed you Bruce," Nat tells him.

"I did, for years. I've been treating the Hulk like he's some kind of disease, something to get rid of. But then I started looking at him as the cure,' Bruce explains, "Eighteen months in a gamma lab. I put the brains and the brawn together. And now look at me. Best of both worlds."

"I like it," You tell him "It works. You look great."

"Thank you (Y/n)," Bruce says pointedly, giving everyone else a look, "You look good too. Tired, maybe. Hungry. Have some eggs."

"Excuse me, Mr. Hulk?" A young girl asks, saving Bruce from the biting retort on your lips. "Can we get a photo?"

"100% little person. Come on, step up," Bruce holds the phone out to Lang, "You mind?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Thanks. Say 'green'," He tells the children before Lang snaps the photo, "Did you get that?"

Lang nods, handing the phone back over, "Don't you wanna grab one with me? I'm Ant-Man." The kids shake their head, "They're Hulk fans, they don't know Ant-Man," Lang explains quickly, "No one does."

"Wait, no no, he feels bad. No, he wants you to… He wants to…" Bruce looks at one of the boys, "You want to take a picture with him right?" The boy shakes his head vigorously.

"Alright, I'm sure Lang's ego will heal," You interrupt, "Can we, you know, focus here?"

"Right. The Hulk time travel do-over?" Bruce clarifies, "Guys, it's outside my area of expertise."

"Well you pulled this off," Nat smiles, "I remember a time when that seemed pretty impossible too."

"Alright, alright. I'll give it a shot," Bruce grins, "Yeah, you're right. I've totally got this."

You had a sinking feeling that he totally didn't have this.


	42. Chapter 42

"Okay, here we go," Bruce announces. You all sit outside while Bruce stands in front of a panel and Lang stands in front of his van in the Ant-Man suit. "Time travel test number one. Scott, fire up the uhhh… the van thing."

"Breakers are set," Steve says, "Emergency generators are on standby."

"Good. 'Cause if we blow the grid I don't wanna lose tiny here in the 1950's," Bruce says casually. You all look up at him, slightly alarmed.

"Excuse me?" Lang asks.

"He's kidding!" Nat says quickly, and then in a more hushed tone to Bruce, "You can't say things like that."

"Just… It was a bad joke," Bruce tells him.

"You were kidding right?" Natasha continues, and you look at Bruce.

"I have no idea," Bruce whispers back, "We're talking about time travel here. Either it's all a joke, or none of it is," He shoots Scott a thumbs up, "We're good! Get your helmet on. Scott, I'm gonna send you back a week, let you walk around for an hour, then bring you back in 10 seconds. Makes sense?"

"Perfectly not confusing," Lang responds.

"Good luck Scott," Steve tells him, "You got this."

"You're right I do, Captain America," Lang sounds proud. You wonder idly if he's about to die. Bruce presses a button and Scott disappears.

"On the count of three," Bruce tells you all, "3...2...1!" He presses a button and Lang's back, but when he opens the mask a teenager is standing inside.

"Huh," You mutter, "That's odd."

"Uh guys," Lang says, "This… This doesn't feel right."

"What is this?" Steve demands.

"What's going on?" Bruce asks, and you almost groan.

"That… Who is that?" Nat asks while Bruce hits another couple of buttons.

"Hold on," Bruce tells you, trying to hide the panic in his voice.

"Is that Scott?" Nat asks.

"Yes, it's Scott!" The teenage Scott exclaims before he's sucked back into the Quantum tunnel and is pulled back. This time an old man stands in the suit.

"Oh Jesus," You turn to Bruce, "Do you have any idea what you're doing?"

"Ow! My back!" Old-man Lang cries out before Bruce sends him back.

"What is this?" Steve asks Bruce, closing in now.

"Can I get a little space here?" Bruce says nervously.

"Yeah," Steve says, "Yeah. Can you bring him back?"

"I'm working on it!" Bruce exclaims. He hits another set of buttons and Lang comes back a third time, this time a baby.

"It's a baby," Steve deadpans.

"It's Scott," Bruce tells him seriously.

"As a baby!" Steve argues.

"He'll grow," Bruce points out.

"He's kind of cute," You offer, "I think I like him better this way."

"Bring Scott back!" Steve exclaims. Once more Scott is sucked into the Quantum Tunnel, and Bruce motions Nat over.

"When I say kill the power, kill the power," Bruce tells her.

"Oh my god," Nat says weakly, rushing over to the generator.

"And…" Bruce pauses, "Kill it!"

Nat pulls the lever and everything shuts down. After a brief second Scott tumbles out of the tunnel looking more or less how he had originally.

"Somebody peed my pants," Lang says immediately.

"Oh thank god," Nat breathes.

"But I don't know if it was baby me or old me," Lang continues, "Or just...me...me."

Bruce throws his hands up into the air enthusiastically, "Time travel!"

Steve looks at him for a moment, before shaking his head and walking away. "What?" Bruce calls after him, "I see this as an absolute win!"

You give Bruce a disarming smile, clapping your hand onto his shoulder, "I think you killed it bud," You tell him, "Three stars for time travel, but five for entertainment."

You find Steve sitting in front of the compound dejectedly, his eyes focused on the ground. You sit down next to him with a sigh. "Well, it wasn't perfect," You start and he looks at you exasperated, "What? Did you think time travel was going to be easy?"

"So now you want to think positively?" Steve smiles, but you know there's something broiling underneath.

"I just can't have you give up Steve," You tell him seriously, "Not you."

The roar of an engine breaks the silence, and you both look up to see a black car speeding towards you. The car skids to a stop a few feet from you, and then backs up to close the distance. The window rolls down and Tony's face looks out at you. "Why the long faces?" Tony asks, "Let me guess. He turned into a baby."

"Among other things, yeah," Steve tells him, "What are you doing here?"

Tony gets out of the car and walks around to the trunk, ignoring Steve's question. "That's the EPR paradox. Instead of pushing Lang through time you might've wound up pushing time through Lang. It's tricky. Dangerous. Somebody should have cautioned you against it."

"You did," Steve says warily.

"Oh did I?" Tony asks, "Thank god I'm here. Regardless, I fixed it," He holds up his right hand with some kind of device on it, "A fully functioning Time-Space GPS. I just want peace," He flashes a peace sign to illustrate his point, "Turns out resentment is corrosive, and I hate it."

"Me too," Steve says.

"We got a shot at getting these stones, but I gotta tell you my priorities," Tony tells him, "Bring back what we lost? I hope, yes. Keep what I got? I have to, at all costs. And… Maybe not dying trying will be nice."

"Sounds like a deal," Steve tells him, shaking his hand. Tony reaches into the trunk and pulls out Steve's shield before holding it out to him. "Tony…" Steve starts.

"Why?" Tony cuts him off, "He made it for you. Plus, honestly, I have to get it out of the garage before Morgan takes it sledding."

"Thank you Tony," Steve says, fitting the shield onto his arm.

"Will you keep that a little quiet? Didn't bring one from the whole team, sorry kid," Tony says giving you a small smile, and his next words are hesitant, "We are getting the whole team, yeah?"

"We're working on that right now," Steve tells him.

"But we're so happy to have you," You tell Tony warmly. If the plan could get even Stark to change his mind maybe there _was _a chance.


	43. Chapter 43

It was strange having the compound so full as the team started to arrive. With just you and Natasha in the compound it had been easy to avoid seeing anyone for days at a time. Now you had to tread carefully, lest you run into Steve and his pitying glances. You were silently making your way to your room after a long stretch in the gym when you hear your name. You slow and then come to a full stop, listening intently outside the kitchen.

"What are we going to do about (Y/n)?" Nat asks quietly, followed by Steve's heavy sigh.

"What do you mean?" Tony demands, "She's gonna do her part, same as all of us. Do you really think she's going to sit this out? We need all the help we can get."

"(Y/n)'s been…" You can't see but you can picture Steve running his fingers through his hair, "A mess honestly."

"She's volatile," Nat clarifies, "And this situation is too volatile as is."

"So you think benching one uf us is the best move?" Bruce asks, "She's emotional. Invested. That could be good."

"_Could_ be, being the key phrase," Steve says, "I'm not saying she shouldn't fight. I'm just saying this is just the beginning and maybe she should sit this part out."

Your hands clench at your sides and you fight the urge to burst in the door and slam your fist into Steve's face.

"I don't like it," Tony tells him, "And if she's really as volatile as you think this could go the opposite way of what you want. She could leave."

"She could've left at anypoint," Natasha disagrees, "Even when she took off on Steve she still came here."

"How about this," Bruce tries, "Rocket and I are going to Norway to get Thor. We'll take (Y/n) with us. See how she does. Maybe a change of scenery will help."

"We need Thor," Steve stresses, "This is important."

"Yeah, well," Tony says, "We'll need her too."

"You look like shit," Rocket tells you as you climb in the back of the truck, "More than usual, that is."

You ignore him as you settle in across from Bruce. You stare blankly over Bruce's shoulder, trying to ignore the furtive glances Rocket was giving you. "If you give me one more concerned look I'm going to cut off your fucking tail," You tell the racoon darkly. The conversation you had overheard had left you not only livid but hurt as well. Add that on to the talk Steve had given you, telling you to let Rocket and Bruce take the lead on recruiting Thor, and you were in a foul mood.

You barely take in the Norwegian countryside as you roll through, in fact you're surprised as you pass the small sign labelled 'New Asgard'. It had only felt like minutes since your ship had landed.

"Well, this is it," Bruce says mildly as you pull to a stop, around the small town people mill about, working and socializing.

"Kind of a step down from a golden palace for an Avenger highness and whatnot," Rocket says, his nose wrinkling.

"Have a little compassion pal," Bruce responds, "First they've lost Asgard, then half their people. They're probably just happy to have a home."

You follow Bruce as he approaches someone who exclaims, "You shouldn't have come!"

"Aah, Valkyrie!" Bruce grins, "Great to see you angry girl!"

The woman's eyes narrow, "I think I liked you better either of the other ways."

"This is (Y/n)," Bruce says, ignoring her comment, "And Rocket."

"How you doin'?" Rocket asks.

Valkyrie eyes him warily a moment before turning back to Bruce, "He won't see you."

"That bad huh?" Bruce asks.

"We only see him once a month," Valkyrie explains, "When he comes for…" Her eyes drift to a pile of empty kegs, "...Supplies."

"It's that bad," Rocket confirms.

"Yeah," Banner sighs.

"Well too fucking bad," You tell them, stomping in the direction of Thor's home while the other two follow you nervously. "It's time to man up."

"What the-Woo! Something died in here," Rocket says as he steps in behind you, "Hello? Thor?"

"Are you here about the cable?" Thor's voice calls from another room, and you can feel your anger bubbling just below the surface, hot and soothing.

"Cable," Your lips mouth the words and the edges of your vision actually start to go red until you feel Rocket's small hand on your thigh. You glance down and he shakes his head at you. You follow the sound of Thor's voice as he prattles on about the cable until you enter a living area.

"I take what I said back," Rocket says quietly, "_He_ looks like shit."

"Boys! (Y/n)!" Thor exclaims, "Oh my god! Where have you been?" He holds his arms out, looking at Rocket, "Come here you little rascal!"

"No, I'm good. I'm good," Rocket backs away, "That's not necessary."

"Hulk, you know my friends, Miek, Korg, right?" The pair are sitting on the couch holding playstation controllers, a bowl of chips between them.

"Hey, long time no see," Banner greets them.

"Hey guys, beer's on the bucket. Feel free to long onto the Wi-Fi. No password, obviously," One of them, Miek or Korg says before turning back to the game, "Thor, he's back. The kid on the TV that called me a dickhead, again."

"Noobmaster?" Thor asks, and you glance at Rocket, your mouth hardening into a tight line as Thor gets on the mic and begins threatening a child. "So you guys want a drink? What are you drinking? We have beer, tequila, all sorts of things," Thor offers. You break from the group and grab the bottle of tequila off the table, popping it open as you fall into the empty armchair and take a long swig. "That's the spirit!" Thor exclaims, using his axe to open his own bottle of beer.

Bruce claps one hand onto Thor's shoulder, a frown on his face, "Buddy, you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine!" Thor exclaims, "Why? Don't I look alright?"

"You look like melted ice cream," Rocket tells him.

Thor laughs off the comment, "So what's up?"

"We need your help," Bruce says, "There might be a chance we could fix everything."

"What, like the cable?" Thor burps, "'Cause that's been driving me bananas for weeks."

"Like Thanos," Bruce responds.

You watch as the smile leaks from Thor's lips and he puts one shaking hand on Bruce's shoulder, the other one pointed at his face, "Don't you say that name."

One of Thor's friends stands up and takes off his headphones, "Um, yeah. We don't actually say that name in here."

"Please take your hand off of me," Bruce says calmly before brushing Thor's hand away from his face, "Now, I know that… Guy might scare you."

"Why would I be? Why would-Why would I be scared of that guy?" Thor demands, "I'm the one who killed that guy, remember? Anyone else here kill that guy? Nope. Didn't think so. Korg, why don't you tell everyone who chopped Thanos' big head off?"

"Umm… Stormbreaker?" The one who must be Korg answers.

"Now who's swingin' Stormbreaker?" Thor asks.

"I get it," Bruce interrupts, "You're in a rough spot, okay? I've been there myself. You wanna know who helped me out of it?"

"I don't know, is it Natasha?" Thor guesses.

"It was you," Bruce tells him, "You helped me."

Thor crosses the room and looks out the window before pointing with the hand not holding the beer, "Why don't you ask the Asgardians down there how much my help was worth," He falls down onto the couch, "The ones that are left anyway."

"I think we can bring them back," Bruce says simply.

"Stop!" Thor suddenly shouts, "Just… Stop. I know you think I'm down here wallowing in my own self-pity-"

"I'm sorry, is that now what you're doing?" You suddenly snap, unable to keep the words from spilling from your lips despite your promise to everyone to keep your cool. Thor avoids your gaze, and that only spurs you onwards, "Because that's sure as hell what it looks like to me. Look me in the eyes and tell me that's not what this is. Look at me!" You scream the last words, the now empty tequila bottle leaving your hand and smashing into the wall behind him.

"(Y/n)!" Bruce intercepts, "Calm down."

"You're a fucking coward," You continue, barely hearing him, "You can sit there and call it whatever you want, but that's what it comes down to. You're a fucking coward." His jaw clenches, but he only turns his head further away from you, arms crossed. You let out a bitter laugh. "That's what I fucking thought. I'm out of here," You grab the bottle of vodka on the way out, throwing the cap over your shoulder before the door slams behind you.

You're leaning against the hood of the car, a quarter of the way through the vodka when a few minutes later Rocket comes out. He climbs onto the hood, sitting next to you. "Wow, you can really charm a guy," He says looking up at you, "I can't believe he's not begging to join the team."

"Yeah, well," You take a swig of vodka and fall silent.

"Come on. What's going on in that thick human head of yours?"

"It's just… How can he stand there and choose not to act when there's even the slightest chance it could work? This whole thing… I don't even think it's going to work. I don't. Too many variables. Too much to chance. But we owe it to everyone to at least try. Right?" You glance over at Rocket, eyes glassy with unshed tears.

Rocket looks up into your face and then over to the shoreline. "Yeah," He says finally, "Yeah, we do. He's coming," Rocket adds, "And I don't know, I kinda think it might work."


	44. Chapter 44

"Okay so the 'how' works," Steve says from the front of the room, 'Now we gotta figure out the when and the where. Almost all of us have had an encounter with at least one of the six infinity stones."

"Well, I'd substitute the word 'encounter' for damn well near been killed by one of the six infinity stones," Tony reminds him.

"I haven't," Lang cuts in, "I don't even know what the hell you're all talking about."

"Shocker," You mutter lowly, earning a dirty look from Steve and a laugh from Rhodey and Rocket.

"Regardless we only have enough Pym Particles for one round trip each," Bruce explains, "And these stones have been in a lot of different places throughout history."

"Our history," Tony says, "So not a lot of convenient spots to just drop in."

"Which means we have to pick our targets," Clint adds.

"Correct."

"Let's start with the Aether," Steve says, "Thor, what do you know?"

Thor's leaning back in his chair, sunglasses on his face. "Is he asleep?" Nat asks.

"No," Rhodey says, "I'm pretty sure he's dead."

"Where to start? Thor says suddenly, "Umm… The Aether. First, it's not a stone. Someone called it a stone before. It's more of a… angry sludge thing so someone's gonna need to amend that. Here's an interesting story though, many years ago my grandfather had to hide the stones from the Dark Eles," He wiggles his fingers dramatically, "Woo, scary beings. So Jane," He looks up as an image of Jane Foster appears on the screen, "Oh, there she is. That's Jane. She's… An old flame of mine. She stuck her hand inside a rock this one time and then the Aether stuck itself inside her and she became very, very sick. So I had to take her to Asgard which is where I'm from. And we had to try and fix her. We were dating at the time you see, I got to introduce her to my mother, who's dead," You lay your head down in your arms as Thor begins to tear up, "And oh, you know, Jane and I aren't even dating anymore. These things happen though you know, nothing last forever." Tony starts to push Thor towards his chair, "I'm not done yet," Thor tells him, "The only thing permanent in life is impermanence."

Finally getting Thor to sit down, Tony looks around, "Awesome. Eggs? Breakfast?"

"I'd like a Bloody Mary, thank you," Thor tells him.

"Jesus christ," You mutter, "Make it two."

With breakfast sorted out, you start up again. Rocket climbs on the table as you sip your drink, "Quill said he stole the power stone from Morag."

"Is that a person?" Lang asks.

"Morag's a planet," Rocket clarifies, "Quill was a person."

"A planet? Like in outer space?"

"Oh, look. It's like a little puppy, all happy and everything," Rocket mocks, "Do you wanna go to space? You wanna go to space puppy? I'll get you to space."

"Alright Rocket," Steve interrupts, "What about the Soul Stone?"

"Thanos found the Soul Stone on Vormir," Nebula says.

"What is Vormir?" Natasha asks, pausing in the notes she had been writing.

"A dominion of death," Nebula says, "At the very center of Celestial existence. It's where Thanos murdered my sister."

Nat looks up and silence falls over the group as she writes what Nebula had said. "Noted," Lang says, breaking the quiet.

Hours later you still hadn't gotten anywhere. Half formed plans were scattered everywhere, and you were all exhausted. You were pretty sure Thor was asleep in his chair again, while Bruce was lying on the floor.

"That Time Stone guy…" Natasha starts.

"Doctor Strange," Bruce offers.

"Yeah, what kind of doctor was he?"

"Nerostuff meets rabbit from a hat," Tony tells her.

"Nice place in the village though," Bruce reminices.

"Yeah, Sullivan Street," Tony says.

"Hmm… Bleecker."

"Wait, he lived in New York?" Nat demands.

"No. He lived in Toronto."

"Why does it matter where he lived Nat?" You ask, lounging back in your chair.

"Because if you pick the right year there are three stones in New York."

"What?" You ask leaning forward.

Bruce sits up in surprise, "Shut the front door."

Nat starts messing with the holograms until they display the different locations: The Soul Stone in Vormir and the Power stones on Morag in 2014. The Reality Stone in Asgard in 2012. And the Space, Mind, and Time Stones in New York City in 2012.

"So we split up, someone can take the Soul Stone, someone can head to Asgard, and then someone can grab the last three in New York in one go," You say casually, but your heart is beating wildly. For the first time in forever you had a plan. You were on the move. And maybe… Just maybe you had hope. "Seems simple enough."

"All right, we have a plan," Steve announces, "Six stones, three teams. One shot."

You slip on your Quantum Suit, running your fingers over the unfamiliar fabric. You turn at a knock at your door.

"Come in," You call lightly. You watch Steve come in from the mirror in front of you. "I know you didn't want me on this," You tell him without prompting, "I'm alright. I'm steady."

"You heard us," Steve sighs, "I'm sorry."

"You're only thinking of what's best," You turn around to face him, "I know I've been… Well… You know."

"Spiraling?" Steve offers and you give him a tight smile.

"Something like that," You say wrly, "But I know how important this is. I won't let you down."

"You ready?"

"As I'll ever be," You tell him.

The two of you fall into step with the others as you all head towards the Quantum Time machine. Steve walks to the front, addressing the group. "Five years ago, we lost. All of us. We lost friends. We lost family. We lost a part of ourselves. Today we have a chance to take it all back. You know your teams, you know your missions. Get the stones, get them back. One round trip each. No mistakes. No do-overs. Most of us are going somewhere we know. But it doesn't mean we should know what to expect. Be careful. Look out for each other. This is the fight of our lives, and we're gonna win," Tony looks up at Steve, "Whatever it takes. Good luck."

"He's pretty good at that," Rocket murmurs.

"Right?" Lang says looking excited.

"All right. You heard the man," Tony says, "Stroke those jets, Jolly Green."

"Tractors engaged," Bruce says.

Rocket looks at the shrunken Benatar in Clint's hand, "You promise to bring that back in one piece, right?"

"Yeah, yeah yeah. Okay, I'll do my best," Clint tells him.

"As promises go, that was pretty lame," Rocket says.

"Don't worry," You tell him with a small excited smile of your own, "Besides yours truly, Clint's the best pilot I know."

Natasha looks over at him, a smile on her own lips, "See you in a minute."

You stand on the surface of Morag, arms crossed as you wait for Nebula to finish setting the coordinates for Nat and Clint to head to Vormir. "Guys, chop-chop," Nat says, "Come on. We're on a clock."

"All that is really helpful," Rhodey tells her, giving her a hug, "Take care, okay?"

"Yeah," Nat agrees.

"Take that stone and come back. No messing around."

"Hey," Clint tells Rhodey, "You got this."

"Let's get it done," Rhodey says, "Yes sir."

Nat and Clint head toward the ship, "See you back," Nat calls.

"You guys watch each other's six," Rhodey calls after them.

"The coordinates for Vormir are laid in," Nebula says as the ship speeds off, "All they have to do is not fall out."

"I'm not worried about them getting there," You frown, "I'm worried about what comes after."

"Well let's worry about us for right now," Rhodey says, "So what do we do? Just wait around for this Quill guy to show up and then he leads us to the Power Stone, is that it?"

Nebula looks around, "Let's take cover. We're not the only ones in 2014 looking for the stones."

"Wait a minute, what are you talking about right now? Who else is looking for these stones?"

"My father, my sister…" Nebula hesitates, "Me."

"And you? Where are you right now?" Rhodey asks.

"She's not here, we know that much," You interrupt, "Come on, let's go."

The three of you watch from your hiding spot as the one Rocket called Quill dances across the cavern to unheard music.

"So, he's an idiot?" Rhodey asks quietly.

"Yeah," Nebula responds.

"(Y/n), you wanna…"

"All you big man," You gesture towards Quill and Rhodey knocks him unconscious. Nebula rummages through his pockets and withdraws a tool.

"What's that?" Rhodey asks.

"The tool of a thief," Nebula says simply. She uses the tool to open the door, before Rhodey stops her.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," He says, "This is the part where spikes come out with skeletons on the end and everything…"

"What are you talking about? Nebula asks, confused.

"When you break into a place called the 'Temple of the Power Stone', there's gonna be a bunch of boobytraps-"

Nebula shakes her head and walks in and you smile. "I can tell you from experience that doesn't happen much in real life Rhodes," You tell him.

"Okay. Alright. Go ahead," Rhodey mumbles. You watch as Nebula forces her hand into the forcefield and grabs the orb before tossing it to you.

"I wasn't always like this," Nebula says, looking down at her hand where the forcefield had melted off some of the plating.

"Me either," Rhodey tells her, "But we work with what we got, right?"

"That's all we can do," You agree, looking at the orb in your hand.

"Sync up," Rhodey says, and the three of you suit up, "Three… Two… One…"

You reappear at the Avenger's compound, present day, looking around with wide eyes, the orb containing the power stone clutched in your hand.

"Did we get them all?" Bruce asks.

"You telling me this'll actually work?" Rhodey exclaims. You look around, confused.

"Clint, where's Nat?" Bruce asks. Clint's face says everything there is to say. Your chest tightens as Bruce falls to his knees, pounding the ground, his pain palpable in the air.

A silence falls over the group as you all consider how much more was lost if the rest of the plan didn't work, and how much was lost even if it did.

You sit on a log beside the lake with Tony, Steve, Thor, Clint and Bruce, staring at the still water with damp cheeks.

"Do we know if she had family? Tony asks, breaking the silence.

"Yeah," Steve nods, "Us."

"What?" Thor asks, confused.

"I just asked him a question…" Tony tells him.

"Yeah, you're acting like she's dead," Thor says, "Why are we acting like she's dead? We have the stones right? As long as we have the stones Cap, we can bring her back, isn't that right? So stop this shit. We're the Avengers. Get it together."

"We can't get her back," Clint says with finality.

"What?" Thor demands.

"It can't be undone," Clint says, "It can't."

Thor laughs bitterly, "I'm sorry. No offense but you're a very Earthly being. Okay? We're talking about space magin. And 'can't' seems very definitive don't you think?"

"Look, I know that I'm way outside my paygrade here," Clint tells him, "But she still isn't here, is she?"

"Now that's my point-" Thor starts.

"-It can't. Be undone," Clint repeats, "Or that's at least what the, great floating guy had to say," Clint rises to his feet, face red with anger, "Maybe you wanna go talk to him? Okay? Go grab your hammer, and you go fly and talk to him." Clint falls back into his seat, his eyes filling with tears as his anger leaves him, "It was supposed to be me. She sacrificed her life for that goddamn stone. She bet her life on it."

"If the stone could have brought someone who sacrificed themselves for the stone back Thanos would have brought his daughter back," You tell Thor gently.

"How do we know he didn't?" Thor demands.

Suddenly Bruce grabs the bench and hurls it across the lake. After several heaving breaths he turns back to look at you all, "She's not coming back. We have to make it worth it. We have to."

"We will," Steve tells him.

You head back to your room, a bottle of Tequila you had requisitioned from Thor in one hand. You slow as you pass Natasha's door; you glance behind you and then push the door open. Despite the impeccable neatness that greeted you on the other side it still felt homey. An unfinished book sat open on the nightstand next to the bed. On the bookshelf sat several pictures. One of her and Clint in mission gear laughing together. Another of her and the team, her arms slung over Sam and Steve's shoulders. You set down the bottle on the shelf and pick up the photo; you couldn't believe the difference between Steve's easy going smile in this photo against the broken smiles he had been giving you since Thanos' snap.

"I'm sorry," You whisper the words to the photograph, "I'm sorry I couldn't have been there for you. I'm sorry I couldn't have taken your place on Voramir," A tear drips onto the photo, beading on the glass, "I'm sorry I wasn't better."

You set the picture down and retreat from the room leaving the bottle behind.


	45. Chapter 45

"All right. The glove's ready. Question is, who's gonna snap their freaking fingers?" Rocket asks.

"I'll do it," Thor says immediately.

"Excuse me?" Scott asks.

"It's okay." Thor tells him. Everyone starts talking at once, until Steve chimes in.

"Wait, wait, wait," He calls above the noise, "Thor, just wait. We haven't decided who's gonna put that on yet."

"Oh, I'm sorry. What, were you just sitting around waiting for the right opportunity?" Thor demands.

"We should at least discuss it," Scott argues.

"Look, us sitting there staring at that thing is not gonna bring everybody back. I'm the strongest Avenger, okay? So this responsibility falls upon me. It's my duty."

"It's not that…" Tony tries, but Thor quickly interrupts him, "It's-Stop it! Just let me," Thor's eyes are glazed when he looks up, "Just let me do it. Just let me do something good. Something great."

"That is exactly why we need to discuss it," You add in, pushing off from against the wall you were leaning against.

"Oh, she speaks," Thor says, "I was under the impression you were in some kind of permanent time out."

"We may only have one chance to set things right," You continue, ignoring him, "We can't let ourselves be ruled by emotion here."

"What do you think is coursing through my veins right now?" Thor demands.

"Cheez Whiz?" Rhodey offers.

"Lightning." Thor says.

"Yeah," Tony says.

"Lightning won't help you pal," Bruce tells him gently, "It's gotta be me."

"What?" You demand, "No."

"You saw what those stones did to Thanos. It almost killed him. None of you could survive," Bruce tells you.

"How do we know you will?" Steve asks.

"We don't," Bruce says, "But the radiation's mostly gamma. It's like I was made for this."

"Good to go, yeah?" Tony asks him.

"Let's do it," Bruce says.

"You remember… everyone Thanos snapped away five years ago, and just bringing them back to now, today. Don't change anything from the last five years."

"Got it," Bruce says.

After suiting back up, you meet back up.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y., do me a favor and activate Protocol 8," Tony says.

"Yes, boss."

Around you, the facility goes on lockdown.

"Everybody comes home," Bruce says, pulling on the gauntlet. Immediately he falls to his knees, groaning in pain.

"Take it off," Thor shouts, "Take it off!"

"No, wait," Steve kneels down, "Bruce, are you okay?"

"Talk to me Banner," Tony calls.

"I'm okay," Bruce says, "I'm okay."

You can see it overwhelming him though and he lets out a scream. Finally, he manages to snap his fingers. "Bruce!" You call out as he slides to the ground, the gauntlet falling from his arm; Clint kicks it away.

"Bruce!" Steve runs over.

"Don't move him!" Tony tells him.

Bruce reaches up to grab Steve's arm, "Did it work?"

"Worth a shot. It's over," Thor tells him, "It's okay."

Suddenly Clint's phone rings, and he pulls it out with shaking hands, "Honey," He breaths, tears sliding down his face, "Honey."

"Guys!" Scott exclaims, "I think it worked!"

The elation that fills you is almost overwhelming, and for a moment you forget how to breath. You meet Steve's eyes, "Steve," Your voice comes out a whisper, and then you throw yourself into his arms, "Steve, you did it."

"We did it," He whispers back in your ear, wrapping his arms around you.

"Guys-" You barely hear Bruce's warning before the first missile hits the ground less than ten feet from where you're standing. Steve's on top of you in an instance, shielding the two of you with his shield. The explosions that echo around you are deafening and just when you think it might be over you feel a deep rumble in the ground beneath you. You have about half a second to brace yourself before the ground collapses underneath you and you're in free fall.

You hit something solid and pain explodes across the right side of your face. Smoke and dust and dirt swirl through the air around you and you scramble up into a sitting position, pressing your hand against your cheek. It comes away drenched in blood which you wipe onto your pants.

"Mayday-may-" Your comm crackles to life, "Does-copy? Flood-"

"Please repeat," You say into the speaker, "The signal-"

"-Drowning-copy?"

"Shit!" You climb to your feet, stumbling when a wave of dizziness hits you.

"(Y/n)?" A voice calls, and you squint through the smoke.

"Tony?" You call back, and a moment later he emerges, looking much worse for the wear.

"Ooh," He says looking at your face, "You're gonna wanna get that looked at."

"Yeah yeah, kind of got more pressing matters at the moment. Have you seen Steve?"

"Not yet, come on," He starts forward and you follow him. You find his shield first and then a few feet later you see him, lying on the ground.

"Steve," You breathe, dropping painfully to your knees beside him while Tony kneels down on the other side.

"Come on buddy, wake up," Steve's eyelids flutter, "That's my man," Tony holds up the shield, "You lose this again, I'm keeping it."

"What happened?" Steve asks.

"We messed with time. It tends to mess back," Tony says grimly, "You'll see."

Above ground you look around with wide eyes at the decimation around you. "Jesus," You breathe as you recognize Thanos sitting in the distance, a massive sword in his hands. You find Thor standing nearby, watching Thanos.

"What's he been doing?" Tony asks.

"Absolutely nothing," Thor says, his eyes not leaving Thanos.

"Where are the stones?" Steve demands.

"Somewhere under all this," Tony waves to the destruction behind you, "All I know is he doesn't have them."

"So we keep it that way," Steve says firmly.

"You know it's a trap, right?" Thor says mildly.

"Yeah, and I don't much care," Steve tells him.

"Not like we have much choice," You add, your fingers brushing the grips of your guns.

"Good," Thor says, "As long as we're in agreement." He holds out both hands, summoning both Stormbreaker and Mjolnir, "Let's kill him properly this time."

With your companions at your side you stride forward, the four of you stopping in front of Thanos' hulking form. "You could not live with your own failure," Thanos says matter-of-factly as he looks down on all of you, "And where did that bring you? Back to me. I thought by eliminating half of life, the other half would thrive. But you've shown me that's impossible. And as long as there are those that remember what was, there will always be those that are unable to accept what can be. They will resist."

"Yep," Tony says, "We're all kinds of stubborn."

"I'm thankful," Thanos continues, "Because now I know what I must do," He rises to his feet, "I will shred this universe down to its last atom," Thanos pulls on a helmet, "And then… With the stones you collected for me… Create a new one. Teeming with life that knows not what it has lost but only what it has been given. A grateful universe."

"Born out of blood," Steve says in disgust.

"They'll never know it," Thanos reminds him, "Because you won't be alive to tell them."

"Okay, Thor," Tony says, "Hit me."

Thor bangs his axe and hammer together and lightning shoots out. Tony's suit sucks up the energy, and he holds out his hands as the energy shoots out of his body and hands, hitting Thanos. Thor flies at Thanos, Mjolnir in hand but at the last second Thanos grabs Tony, using him as a shield.

Steve runs at Thanos and you leap into action as well, pulling your short sword from your back. Thanos blocks Steve's attack effortlessly and then grabs you around your neck with one large hand. Your fingers dig into his flesh as you struggle for air. Thor's large form enters your rapidly dissipating field of view and Thanos is forced to drop you to block Thor's attack with his shield. You hit the ground with a painful thud and you gasp for air as Thanos grabs Thor, punching him. Thor tries to summon Stormbreaker but Thanos grabs the axe himself. Suddenly Steve runs past you, Mjolnir in one hand.

"I knew it!" Thor shouts, before Thanos kicks him to the ground next to you. The battle between Steve and Thanos is fierce but Thanos quickly gains the upper hand. You find your footing once again as Thanos destroys Steve's shield with his sword before throwing him across the battlefield.

"In all my years of conquest… Violence… Slaughter," Thanos says looking at each one of you, "It was never personal. But I'll tell you now, what I'm about to do to your stubborn, annoying little planet? I'm going to enjoy it very, very much."

Your heart sinks as Thanos' army descends around you. After everything it was going to end the same way it had before, but this time all of you were going down. Half the world had been spared, but thanks to you and the Avengers, they were all doomed as well.

You limp towards Steve as he tightens his broken shield to his arm and turns to face the army with a grim determination. Ignoring the pain radiating through your own body, you join him and he gives you a small nod.

"Well Steve," You say softly, "It's been a pleasure."

"Thanks for being here," He tells you as you stand together, the two remaining soldiers in an impossible battle.


	46. Chapter 46

As Thanos' troops descend you reach out your hand to Steve's, briefly intertwining your fingers. Suddenly a crackling erupts from your communicator, "Cap, you hear me?" Steve looks at you with wide eyes, "Cap, it's Sam, can you hear me? On your left." A low warble sounds from behind you and you turn around to see a yellow portal forming in the air behind you. Okoye, Shuri, and T'Challa climb out of it, and you have to fight to keep your knees from giving out at the sight. Sam flies in from above, and as you look around portals begin to spring up everywhere, dumping familiar faces onto the field. Behind you there's the sound of falling stone and you turn to see Scott, giant again, emerging from the rubble of the facility with Bruce, Rhodey and Rocket.

Steve meets your eyes, his bright with hope, "Avengers!" He shouts, holding out his hand which Mjolnir flies readily into, "Assemble!"

Thor lets out a shout of glee and then you're running towards the oncoming soldiers fearlessly, guns in hand.

Beside you Steve and Thor fight against the horde side by side. Steve catches Stormbreaker, "No, give me that," Thor says flying by, "You have the little one," He passes over Mjolnir and takes back Stormbreaker. Steve gives him an amused look before lightning crackles through the hammer and he's back in the action.

"Hey gorgeous," Sam swoops over head, shooting into the horde, "Miss me?"

"More than you know!" You call back, a wide smile on your face. You fight ruthlessly, funneling all of your emotions, the anger, the pain, the loss into your deadly accuracy and instincts, but part of you is endlessly searching for Bucky. Where was he?

"Anyone see an ugly brown van up there?" Steve asks over the comm. You look around with no luck.

"Yes!" A slightly familiar voice says suddenly, "But you're not going to like where it's parked!"

T'Challa runs past with the gauntlet, and then you see Thanos' sword boomerang, cutting him off. Thanos grabs the sword and charges, and then Wanda is there, sending debris towards Thanos. You dart past, hands up like a receiver and T'Challa throws the gauntlet to you. You make your way across the battlefield, ducking out of lines of fire and shooting anything there is to shoot.

"I've got the gauntlet," You say into your comm, "Headed towards the van now-Shit," You curse as some kind of large alien steps into your path.

"(Y/n)?" Steve asks.

"Yeah… Might be a minute-" It swings a large hammer in your direction, forcing you to duck, "I got a-thing." A familiar red suit catches your eye, "Hey-Spiderkid! Catch!" You throw the gauntlet and he catches it.

"I got it!" He announces, "Activate Instant Kill!"

"Alright big guy," You mutter, "Let's go." You dodge his attacks easily, his size made him slow and wait for your opening. He brings the hammer down, striking the ground where you had been moments before and you jump onto the head, running up the handle. When you reach the top you launch yourself upward, flipping over his head and using your short sword to remove the previously mentioned body part from his shoulders. You land nearly on the ground and flick the blood from the blade before returning it to your holster.

Overhead you see Danvers arrive, scooping up the gauntlet. You grab your rifle and start taking out a hoard of nearby chitauri soldiers. "Fuck!" You let out a snarl as a stray bullet tears through your hip, leaving a deep groove in the skin. You spin on the spot, shooting in the direction it had come from, taking out another handful of enemy shoulders. One of the alien dogs tackles you from the side and you're barely able to turn so you land on your back and are able to defend yourself. With one hand you hold the thing's neck while the other reaches for your dropped gun. Suddenly it's weight starts to disappear, and you watch, stunned, as it starts to disintegrate on top of you. You climb to your feet, looking around as the enemy army begins to turn to dust across the battlefield.

And that's when you see _him_. He's about fifty feet away, looking around with a similarly dazed expression. Your gun tumbles from your hand and you're running towards him, shoving half dissolved enemies out of your way.

"(Y/n)? What's going on?" Sam asks as you sprint past him. Bucky turns at your approach, and then you reach him, jumping into his half raised arms and sobbing into his neck.

"Hey, hey," You can feel his lips against your hair, "It's okay, I'm here. I'm here doll."

Steve finds you not long after, looking battered but quite alive. His expression however is not one who just unexpectedly won the battle of a lifetime. You scramble to your feet, wincing against the pain of the bullet wound and limp towards him. "What happened?" You ask, gripping his army to steady yourself.

"It's Tony," His face crumples, and a sharp pain radiates from your chest outwards, "He… He used the stones. He saved us but…"

He can't say the words so you nod, swallowing thickly, "Does… Does Pepper know?"

"She was with him when…" Bucky comes up beside you, wrapping his metal arm around your waist. "Hey Buck," Steve says lifelessly, "Good to have you back." Steve's eyes trail from your blood smeared face to Bucky's arm and the gash in your leg, "Come on," He says finally, "Let's go home."


	47. Chapter 47

You scarcely remember the trip back to Steve's Brooklyn apartment. No one says much, Sam lets Wanda have the front seat, and you take the spot between Sam and Bucky in the back. The apartment you had sometimes shared with Steve wasn't large enough for the four of you, but those living at the compound before had nowhere else to go. And maybe after everything none of you wanted to be alone.

You head to your bedroom and Bucky comes in a moment later, first aid kit in hand. "Gotta patch you up doll," He tells you.

"Thanks," You tell him as he gently washes the blood from your face, "How bad is it?"

"Pretty gruesome," He admits, "But I think you'll survive. This isn't too bad either," Bucky gestures to your leg, "You're lucky."

"Yeah," You agree quickly, "I missed you."

"It's over," Bucky tells you, "I'm sorry about your friend."

"Me too," You pull your knees up to your chin, hugging your legs.

"So livin' with Stevie huh?" Bucky asks, "How's that?"

"Only sometimes," You tell him with a small smile, "When it got to be too much at the compound I'd come here. And then when it got to be too much here I went right back. It was quiet there I guess. Mostly it was just Natasha unless the others stopped in. They didn't much. They were all out helping people," The words tumble from your lips, "I didn't help anyone Buck, I sat here, there, wherever and I drank whatever I could find. For months. Years," A tear runs down your cheek and falls from your chin, "I was so goddamn angry. So helpless. I've never felt like that. After everything I've been through, everything _they _did to me, all the pain, misery, _fear_. I've never been paralyzed like I was. Lost."

You look up at him with glassy eyes and without saying anything he slips his hand into yours. He runs his fingers over the criss-crossing scars on your knuckles and then pulls you to him, letting your tears soak into the fabric of his shirt.

Your hands tremble imperceptibly as Pepper carries a wreath out of her and Tony's cottage. You catch a glimpse as she walks past, on top of the wreath lies the arc reactor, and you just make out the words "Proof that Tony Stark has a heart," before she passes you by. Everyone is there, proving Tony Stark had all your hearts as well.

After the funeral there's a series of goodbyes. Bucky stands off to the side as Thor approaches you, his expression grim but lighter than you had seen it in ages. "(Y/n)," He says, "I wanted to thank you for your words at my home. I see now that it was the truth. Only you had the courage to confront me about my cowardice, and for that you have my respect."

"I had no right," You tell him, "I was doing the exact same thing and I took it out on you. I should be apologizing to you."

"Well it's all water under the bridge now," Thor waves one large hand, "What is next for you now?"

You pause for a moment, then smile, "I don't know," You admit, "Isn't that weird? For the first time in my life I don't have a mission. How about you?"

"Well-"

"Will you hurry up?" Rocket interrupts, coming up behind Thor, "Ship's leaving buddy, you're either on it or you ain't."

"I'm going to travel with these morons for awhile," Thor gestures back towards where the Benetar is parked. "Impatient morons."

"Yeah, yeah," Rocket rolls his eyes, "Get a move on pal."

Thor smiles and wraps you in a bone crushing hug, "I'm sure we'll meet again on the path of life."

Rocket looks up at you as Thor walks to the ship, "You know, you're not bad, for a human."

"I'm gonna miss you too Rocket," You tell him honestly, "If you're ever in this quadrant of the galaxy…"

"Yeah, don't count on it," He says, but smiles, "You sure don't want to sell that arm? I'll give you a good price."

"I think I'll hold onto it," Bucky replies.

"Fine," Rocket sighs, "Alright. See ya meatbags."

"That's a raccoon," Bucky says warily as Rocket walks away, "Kind of thought I hallucinated it the first time, to be honest."

"Tried to buy your arm twice now," You remind him.

"So what is next?" Bucky asks you," You have any idea?"

"Well, getting out of Steve's place is probably step one," You run your hand through your hair, "I don't know. This is nice," You gesture towards the cottage behind you, "Maybe a little house upstate? I could retire I guess. The quiet life." Bucky looks at you with something close to surprise and you laugh, "Okay, maybe not retirement."

"I just can't picture you drinking lemonade on a porch," Bucky shakes his head.

"I _am_ retirement age," You remind him, "But no, you're right. I don't know," You say finally, "Isn't that funny?" You can see Steve and Sam approaching and you smile, "I guess I'll start with getting these stones back and see where life takes me. How about you?"

Bucky looks visibly confused, his forehead wrinkling, "What do you mean? Do you not want… I thought we… I guess it's been a long time since Wakanda for you. If things are different now, I understand."

"What?" You ask, before what he said had set in, "_No_. I just-we never talked about," You cringe, Sam and Steve were almost to you now, so you drop your voice, "_us_, before everything happened. I didn't know if you-" You cut yourself off, taking a deep breath, "As far as I'm concerned Buck, I'm with ya-till the end of the line."

Bucky smiles at the familiar line and intertwines his fingers with yours as you turn to face Steve.

"Remember, you have to return the stones to the exact moment you got them," Bruce tells Steve, "Or you're gonna open up a bunch of nasty alternative realities."

"Don't worry Bruce," Steve assures him, "Clip all the branches."

"You know, I tried," Bruce says suddenly, "When I had the gauntlet, the stones, I really tried to bring her back. I miss them, man."

"Me too," Steve tells him.

"We all do," You add, smiling sadly at Bruce.

"You know, if you want I can come with you," Sam tells Steve.

"We all would," You frown, turning to Steve, "I don't understand why this has to be a solo trip."

"I know," Steve responds, "This one's on me though." Steve turns to Bucky, "Don't do anything stupid until I get back."

"How can I?" Bucky asks, "You're taking all the stupid with you." Steve wraps him in a hug. "Gonna miss you, buddy."

"It's gonna be okay Buck," Steve tells him, before giving you the same treatment. Steve goes over to the Quantum portal.

"How long is this gonna take?" Sam asks.

"For him? As long as he needs." Bruce says, "For us? Five seconds." Steve picks up Mjolnir, "Ready Cap? Alright. We'll meet you back here, okay?"

"You bet."

"Going quantum in three… Two… One…" Steve disappears, and you look up at Bucky, a small frown on your lips.

"He's not coming back, is he?" You ask him quietly so Sam and Bruce can't hear. Bucky doesn't respond but you can see it in his eyes.

"And returning in three… Two… One…" Steve doesn't appear on the pad. Bruce looks around in confusion.

"Where is he?" Sam demands.

"I don't know. He blew right by his time stamp," Bruce exclaims, "He should be here."

"Well get him back!" Sam says.

"I'm trying," Bruce tells him.

"Get him the hell back!" Sam shouts.

"Hey, I said I'm trying!"

"Sam," Bucky calls. Sam looks over and he nods towards a bench where an elderly gentleman sits. The three of you walk towards him, and then Bucky motions Sam forward, "Go ahead."

Bucky wraps his arm around you as they talk, tuning out the quiet words that float over to you. When Steve hands Sam his shield, Sam looks over at Bucky who gives him a solemn nod. When Sam walks away you leave Bucky's side and sit down next to Steve.

"You finally look your age," You tell him, "If you didn't I would kick your ass right now Rogers." He just smiles, "And now I have to find you a nursing home. You're really putting me in a spot here."

"I'm sorry."

You bite your lip, "Just tell me it was worth it."

"That I can do," Steve smiles again, "So many wonderful years."

"Okay," You give him a look, "We would've come, you know? Buck and I."

"I know. But I think this world could still use you two," Steve smiles, "Just a hunch."

"I still need you," You tell him quietly, trying to hold back the tears that had sprung to your eyes.

"No," Steve shakes his head, "You don't."

You press your lips to his cheek as a tear rolls down yours and get to your feet. When you reach Bucky he wraps his arm around your waist. You look up at him with a small smile.

"Time for our happy ending," Bucky tells you quietly and presses a kiss to the top of your head.


End file.
